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Zoo Jokes

170 zoo jokes and hilarious zoo puns to laugh out loud. Read animal jokes about zoo that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Looking for a laugh? Check out our collection of funny zoo jokes. From silly penguin puns to hilarious lion jokes, we've got all the animal jokes you need to keep you entertained.

Best Short Zoo Jokes

Short zoo jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The zoo humour may include short petting zoo jokes also.

  1. I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in the cage Zookeeper said it was bread in captivity
  2. I met my girlfriend whilst she was working at the zoo. There she was in her uniform – straightaway I knew she was a keeper.
  3. At the zoo I noticed a slice of toast in one of the enclosures. I asked the keeper, 'How did that toast get into the cage?'
    'It was bread in captivity' she replied.
  4. My buddy took a job circumcising elephants at the zoo The money's not great but the tips are huge
  5. I have the memory of an elephant. I remember one time I went to the zoo and saw an elephant.
  6. I lost my job at the zoo recently. There was a sign that said do not feed the animals. So I didn't.
  7. I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage The sign said they were bread in captivity.
  8. What do you get when you mix Human DNA and goat DNA? A stern police warning and a lifetime ban from the petting zoo
  9. I went to the zoo today and saw a bagel locked up in a cage. Apparently it was bread in captivity.
  10. I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in a cage I guess you could say it was bread in captivity

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Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about zoo can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of zoo puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Zoo One Liners

Which zoo one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with zoo? I can suggest the ones about safari and wildlife.

  1. What do you get if you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the zoo.
  2. What do you get when you cross human DNA and goat DNA? Thrown out of the petting zoo
  3. My new girlfriend works at the Zoo. I think she is a keeper.
  4. What do you get when you inject human DNA into a sheep? ...banned from the petting zoo...
  5. What happens when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo.
  6. I have the heart of a lion, the eyes of an eagle... ..and a lifetime ban from the zoo. 😕
  7. My father has the heart of a lion... And also a lifetime ban from the zoo.
  8. A Poem Roses are red,
    Violets are blue,
    Stop memes about Harambe
    -Cincinnati Zoo
  9. I have the eye of a tiger, the heart of a lion, And a lifetime ban from the zoo.
  10. Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped. It was otter chaos.
  11. I went to a zoo one time and all they had was a dog. It was a shih tzu.
  12. What do you get when you inject human DNA into a goat? Kicked out of the petting zoo.
  13. I have the memory of an elephent. It was at the zoo.
  14. I have the heart of a lion... and a lifelong ban from the zoo.
  15. My grandfather has a heart of a tiger. He also has a lifetime ban at the zoo.

Animal Zoo Jokes

Here is a list of funny animal zoo jokes and even better animal zoo puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I got fired form the zoo. Apparently the sign "Don't feed the animals" was only meant for the visitors.
  • I went to a zoo the other day. The only animal they had was a dog It was a shitzu.
  • A man goes to a zoo and is disappointed to find it has only one animal, a dog It's a Shih Tzu.
  • I lost my kid at the zoo the other day.... I couldn't find him, so they just shot all the animals.
  • Happy Greek Easter! Which Greek God loved to collect animals? Zoos
  • A man walks into a zoo, and there's only one animal. It's a dog. It's a shitzu.
  • A family walks into a zoo and the only animal there is a dog. ...
    It was as a Shitzu
  • What's the difference between a zoo in Louisiana and a zoo anywhere else? In louisiana, next to the plaque with the animal's name, they've got a good recipe.
  • What's the difference between a Yankee zoo and a Southern zoo? The Yankee zoo will have the name of the animal and its Latin name. The Southern zoo will have the name of the animal and a recipe.
  • I visited the zoo in another town... there was only one animal.
    It was a dog.
    It was a shih tzu.

Petting Zoo Jokes

Here is a list of funny petting zoo jokes and even better petting zoo puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? Alot of dirty looks and kicked out of the petting zoo, apparently.
  • What happens if you get human DNA in a goat? You get banned from the petting zoo.
  • What do you get when you mix human and goat dna? Kicked out of the petting zoo.
  • What do you get when yo cross sheep DNA with human DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo.
  • What do you get when you put human DNA in a goat? Banned from the petting zoo.
  • A monkey escaped from the petting zoo. He rode out the gates on the back of a baby sheep.
    Authorities have stated that he is on the lamb.
  • I went to a petting zoo. When I was feeding the sheep, one began to choke. So I laid him on his back and adminstered SheePR.
    He survived, but he was in pretty ba-aa-aa-ad shape.
  • What do you get when you add human DNA with goat DNA I don't know but I was kicked out of the petting zoo..
  • Q: What do you get when you cross human and goat DNA? A: Banned from the petting zoo.
  • Did you hear about the man with a cold who went to a miniature petting zoo? He was feeling a little hoarse.

Zoo Keeper Jokes

Here is a list of funny zoo keeper jokes and even better zoo keeper puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I met my girlfriend whilst visiting the London Zoo. Straight away I knew she was a keeper.
  • I'll never forget how I met my wife at the zoo From the moment I saw her I knew she was a keeper
  • So I met this really nice girl at the zoo! She was a keeper.
  • I met my girlfriend while visiting the zoo. There she was, in her uniform... straightaway I knew she was a keeper
  • Yo mama's so fat... When she picked up a toddler the zoo keepers shot her.
  • I'm dating a guy that works at the zoo... He's a keeper!
  • An orangutan in the zoo has two books The Bible and Darwin's Origin Of Species. He's trying to figure out if he's his brother's keeper—or his keeper's brother.
  • Got sacked from my job as a zoo keeper. But as I said in my disciplinary
    "all the signs say DON'T feed the animals"
  • What's the difference between a Stormtrooper and a Zoo Keeper? The Storm Trooper would have missed harambe
  • What did the zoo keeper say when he saw the elephant wearing sunglasses? nothing, he didn't recognise him

Zoo Exhibit Jokes

Here is a list of funny zoo exhibit jokes and even better zoo exhibit puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I was at the zoo's aquatic exhibit, staring at the lone dolphin and pondering that I couldn't remember what noise they make. Then it clicked.
  • I went to a zoo but the only exhibit open was for a tiny dog. It was a Shih Tzu
  • Visitors to the zoo were not sure they liked the changes to the bear exhibit It was Polarizing
  • I went to the zoo today. They had a yaks in the wildebeest exhibit. Did they really think I would fall for fake gnus?
  • Why did the zoo close the big cat exhibit? Because they just kept lion around!
  • There was only one animal at the zoo! The only exhibit at the zoo was a lonely dog. It was a shitzu.
  • Whst do you call a zoo that only exhibits small dogs? A shitzoo.
    Another original from my 10 year old. Not happy with the language but it made me smile :)
  • I went to the African exhibit at my local zoo. I knew it was fake when I saw all of the people walking around with food.
  • Sean Connery walks into a zoo in Scotland. The only animal there on exhibit was a dog. It was a shitzu.
  • I went to the Zoo yesterday and it only had one exhibit. It was a Shih Tzu

Entertaining Zoo Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone

What funny jokes about zoo you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean nature jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make zoo prank.

This is an old joke that my teacher told me when I was little and most people probably already know it but I remember loving it.

A police officer pulls over a man who has penguins in the backseat of the car.
"Sir you can't have penguins in your car. Bring them to the zoo or something," the police officer tells the man.
The next day, the police officer sees the man again. Again, the penguins are in the backseat of the car.
"Sir, I told you to take the penguins to the zoo!"
"I did, Officer! Today I'm taking them to the movies."

I saw that our local zoo has an interesting attraction : A lion and a sheep living peacefully in the same cage.


I asked the zookeeper whether they ever fight. He said, "Rarely."
I asked what happens when they do.
"We get another sheep."

A man walks into a bar and asks for the bill

The bartender looks confused and tells the man he didn't order anything.
The man says I know, but I own the zoo down the street. I heard about the time a grizzly bear, elephant, monkey, tiger, alligator,... walked into a bar. I'm here to pay for the damages.

I met my wife at the zoo.

The moment I saw her there, dressed head to toe in khaki and covered in animal s**..., I knew she was a keeper.

3 blondes are walking in the woods.

3 blonde girls are walking in the woods when they stumble across a set of tracks, the first girl having went to a zoo last week claims that the tracks are deer tracks, the second blonde laughs,
"Caitlyn you dumb b**... those are bear tracks!"
The third blonde chimes in,
"Oh my god no you're both wrong those are rabbit tracks."
They were still arguing when the train hit them.

Letter Z getting removed Joke

After carefully considering and debating the matter for over two years, the Engwish Wanguage Centwaw Commission (EWCC) came to the concwusion that the letter Z should be remowed from the Engwish alphabet.
zero becomes xero
zoo is now xoo
visualize becomes visualise
analyze becomes analyse
zodiac is now xodiac

Carl opened a zoo.

Carl opened a zoo and made the entry fee $60. No one turned up.
Carl made the entry fee $30. Yet again, no one turned up.
So, Carl made the zoo free to enter, soon enough, it was full.
Carl shut the gates, released the lions, and made the exit fee $60.

A man was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him. The officer looked in the back of the man's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?

The man replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.
You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.
The next day, the officer saw the same guy driving down the road. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.
I did, the man replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach.

Did you know penguins scream during s**...?

Maybe not all of them?
But definitely the one I cornered at the zoo.

I took my 8 year old niece to the zoo last week...

..we were walking around the various cages and enclosures when all of a sudden she yells, Look Uncle John! It's a frickin' Elephant!
I was shocked and slightly angry, as everybody was looking at us. What did you just call it? I asked.
It's a frickin' Elephant, it says so on the picture! she said, ... and so it did, A F R I C A N Elephant.

A man named Jeff was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him.

The officer looked in the back of Jeff's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?

Jeff replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.

You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.

The next day, the officer saw Jeff driving down the road once again. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.

I did, Jeff replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach."

A man was driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back seat.

A police officer stops him and says that he can't just drive around with the penguins in the car and that he should take them to the zoo. The man agrees and drives off.
The next day the same man is driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back again. He is stopped by the same police officer who says,
"Hey! I told you to take those to the zoo."
The man replies, "I did. Today I'm taking them to the movies."

I have the memory of an elephant

When I was six, my parents took me to the zoo. There I saw an elephant.

Just back from the zoo. Saw a slice of toast lying in one of the enclosures.

It was bread in captivity.

Did you know that penguins scream during s**...?

Well, I don't think all of them do, but the ones I cornered at the zoo sure did...

A woman walking down the city sidewalk with an adult lion is confronted by a police officer

He: "Lady, you must take that animal directly to the zoo!"
She: "I will do that right away, officer."
The next day, the officer is exasperated to see her and the lion walking down the sidewalk again.
He: "I told you to get that animal to the zoo!"
She: "That was yesterday. Today we are going to the beach."

A man finds a penguin on the road...

A man finds a penguin on the road side. Thinking the penguin is lost the man takes it, drives until finding a police officer and asks what to do.
- Take it to the zoo replies the officer.
One week latter the policer officer sees the man driving with the penguin by his side.
What are you doing with that penguin ? I told you to bring him to the zoo.
I did exactly that. He loved it and now we are going to the movies .

I went to the zoo and saw a piece of toast in a cage.

The sign said "Bread in captivity".

A old man as a pet mongoose who gives birth.

Deciding he can't look after the mongoose and the pup he decides to donate them to the zoo and writes a letter to explain.
Dear zoo,
I would like to donate two ~~mongooses~~ ~~mongeeses~~ ~~mongi~~
.
.
.
Dear zoo,
I would like to donate one mongoose.
PS here is another.

So a man is walking a penguin down the street...

So a man is walking a penguin down the street on a lead. A policeman sees him and stops the man.
The policeman says, "what are you doing?! Take that penguin to the zoo!"
A week later, the policeman sees the man with the penguin again.
He says, "hey, I thought I told you to take that penguin to the zoo!"
The man replies: "I did! He loved it! We're going to the theme park tomorrow!"

FRESH HARAMBE OF BELL AIR....

In west Cincinnati I was born and raised on the zoo grounds is where I spent most of my days,Chillin out hangin out acting all cool, eating bananas out by the pool When a mom and her kid, they were up to no good, crawled over the fence into my neighborhood,I got in one little fight and my zoo keeper got scared, heard a gunshot just before I stopped breathing air.......

A blonde was visiting the zoo and reached the big cat exhibit.


"I wonder what these tigers would say if they could talk," she said to the man next to her.
He replied, "I'm pretty sure they'd say 'We are leopards.'".

Kinda corny but it did actually crack me up...

Q. What do you get if you insert human DNA into a chimpanzee?
A. Banned from the Zoo.

Monkey Business

A zookeeper notices the lonely female gorilla is feeling depressed and needs to cheer her up again. He asks the r**... janitor of the zoo if he'll have s**... with the gorilla for $500.
The r**... says that he'll do it under 2 conditions.
Ok, says the zookeeper, what are they?
I don't want anyone to ever find out.
Ok, done! What's your second condition?
The r**... says; "I'll need an extra week to come up with the five hundred dollars."

What do you get when you mix human DNA and Gorilla DNA?

Kicked out of the zoo.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue......

who killed harambe?
Cincinnati zoo

A funny story

A man had a bunch of penguins in his truck, when suddenly a police officer came and asked him what was in the truck, the man said "My penguins," The police said to take the penguins to the zoo.
The next day, the police officer came back asking where the penguins were. The man said, "They're in my truck. The police officer replied, "I thought I told you to take them to the zoo," "I did," replied the man, ''Today I'm taking them to the beach."

I once had a job with the zoo, circumsizing elephants.

It didn't pay very much, but the tips were humongous!

I took a job at a zoo performing elephant circumcisions

The benefits aren't great, but the tips are huge.

Tried translating a joke from Latvian.

John, a rural farmer, decided to visit the zoo in the capital with his family. He has a lot of fun, and comes back ecstatic. His neighbor
Tolya asks him what he saw there.
"Well, I saw a giraffe."
"What's a giraffe?"
"Well, you know horses?"
"Yeah."
"It's like a horse, but really tall and with a long neck."
"Okay, what else?"
"Zebra."
"Zebra?"
"Well, you know horses?"
"Yeah."
"It's like a horse, but with stripes."
"Okay, what else then?"
"I saw a hippo. "
"What's that?"
"You know horses?"
"Yeah?"
"Like a horse, but big and fat."
"Hm. Okay. Anything else?"
"Yes... a crocodile."
"What's a crocodile?"
"You know horses?"
"Yeah?"
"Nothing like one."

On the anniversary of Harambe's death...

the Cincinnati Zoo should have special deals all day. Discounts for Harambe.

A zookeeper wishes to buy some new animals from another wildlife park.

She writes:
Dear sir, We are a recently opened zoo and are looking to purchase 2 mooses. "No that doesn't sound right." She thinks.
We are looking to purchase 2 meese. "No that can't be right either."
Dear sir, I wish to inquire about purchasing a moose. Kind Regards.
P.S. Please send another moose along with the first.

I used to work at the zoo, where my job was to circumcise Elephants.

The pay was rubbish, but the tips were huge!

A boy sees an alligator in the zoo

A boy sees an alligator in the zoo and shouts

"Hey are you a caiman?"


"I'm alright, thanks kid!" He replies

I have the eyes of a hawk, the ears of a fox…

and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

A zoo's only gorilla dies...

so the zookeeper hires an actor to wear a gorilla costume until the zoo can get another one.
In the gorilla pen the actor makes faces, beats his chest, swings around, and soon draws a huge crowd. Encouraged, he then crawls atop a beam across the lion's enclosure, taunting the animal below. But, in horror, he lost his grip, falling into the lion's cage.
Terrified, the actor shouts, Help! Help me! Too late. The lion pounces, opens its massive jaws, and whispers urgently, Shut up! Do you want to get us both fired?!

For my summer job, I worked at the zoo, circumsizing elephants

The pay wasn't great, but the tips were enormous!

Why was the snake pressed againt the glass at the zoo?

He wanted to be a windshield viper.

I have the memory of an elephant...

One time I went to the zoo and saw an elephant.

Cop sees a blonde with a bunch of penguins in the back of her car

So he stops her and asks her what she is doing with a bunch of penguins. She says she just saw them on the road and opened the door and they got in.
"You've got to take those penguins to the zoo," he says. Next day he sees her again with the penguins still in the back of her car.
Cop: Lady I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo.
Blonde: I did and we had such a good time, today we're going to the park.

What do you get when you mix human DNA with zebra DNA?

Well, kicked out of the zoo for starters.

I have the heart of a lion...

and a lifetime ban at the zoo

I got a job at the zoo circumcising Elephants.

The pay s**... but the tips are huge.

What happens when you put a zebra in a lion cage?

You get fired from the zoo

My Grandfather has the heart of a lion!

And a ban from the cincinnati zoo

Horror at the zoo

A man is at the zoo with his family. Suddenly a flustered employee comes up and says
*Sir, sir! There's been a terrible accident!*
The man responds, *What happened?*
*Your mother-in-law fell into the alligator pool!*
The man, supremely calm, says to the worker, *Not my problem! You try to save those alligators.*

A man in Texas is driving with twenty penguins in the bed of his pickup…

…when he is stopped by a State Trooper. The trooper approaches and tells the man that he needs to take the penguins to the zoo immediately as they are non-native and not registered to the man as pets. Right away, officer, replies the man, and off he goes.
The following day, the same man is driving on the same road with the same twenty penguins in the bed of his truck. This time, however, the penguins are all wearing sunglasses and straw hats. Sure enough, the man is stopped by the same officer. After pulling the man over, the officer approaches.
What is the meaning of this? I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday, why are they still in the bed of your truck? Did you really think these disguises would fool me?
They're not disguises, officer, you see I DID take them to the zoo yesterday—in fact, we had so much fun, we're going to the beach today.

Did you hear about the baguette in the zoo?

It was bread in captivity.

A man walks into a zoo

But he finds no animals, except a dog. He finds a zookeeper and asks him, "what's so special about this dog that you guys got rid of the other animals?"
The zookeeper replies, "Nothing, it's just a shitzu."

jokes about zoo

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these zoo jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.