The Best 29 Zombie Apocalypse Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Zombie Apocalypse jokes. There are some zombie apocalypse jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these zombie apocalypse puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Zombie Apocalypse Jokes and Puns

Why is the deep south US the safest place to relocate during the zombie apocalypse?

Toothless zombies can't bite.

Where do you go during a zombie apocalypse?

The living room.

As soon as the Zombie Apocalypse hits

I'm grabbing a sledgehammer and heading down to the local cemetery for the greatest game of Whack-A-Mole ever.

If there's ever a zombie apocalypse, I really hope it starts in Vegas

Because what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

During a zombie apocalypse

Normal Zombies: BRAAINNNNSSS!!
Vegetarian Zombies: GRAAINNNNSSS!!
Body Builder Zombies: GAAINNNNSSS!!
Plumber Zombies: DRAAINNNNSSS!!
Conductor Zombies: TRAAINNNNSSS!!
Weatherman Zombies: RAAINNNNSSS!!
Gamer Zombies: GAMMMMESSS!!
Depressed Zombies: PAINNNNSSS!!
Batman Zombie: BANNNNEEE!!

Zombie Apocalypse has begun...

Man, it's hectic out there. I've killed like 6 zombies already. How's everyone else holding up? Anyone know why they all have bags of candy?

What is considered an apocalypse by a zombie?

A Necrophiliac outbreak

Imagine being in Walmart during the zombie apocalypse

On one side are lumbering, fat things with mucus coming out there nose dragging themselves across the ground and on the other side are zombies

What do you call a cripple in a zombie apocalypse?

Meals On Wheels!

It's really easy to survive a zombie apocalypse

It's a no-brainer

I asked the hotel checkout girl, "Do you provide turndown service?"

She said, "Sure. I wouldn't go out with you if you were the last guy on earth after the zombie apocalypse and your saliva contained the antidote."

You can explore zombie apocalypse reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean zombie apocalypse dad jokes. There are also zombie apocalypse puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

What do you call a zombie apocalypse in Wisconsin?


I survived a zombie apocalypse by wearing a MAGA hat

The zombies thought I had no brain to eat

Why aren't Hungarians worried about the prospect of starving in a Zombie apocalypse?

Well there will always be Ghoul hash.

Where should you go in the event of a zombie apocalypse?

Old folks home. Nobody has teeth to bite you!

Why hasn't the zombie apocalypse happened already?

Someone's really been dragging their feet on that.

Did you hear about the marine veterinarian who stopped the zombie apocalypse and operated on a terminally ill sea cow?

People say she was Hugh manatee's only hope.

I told my friend that he would probably survive a zombie apocalypse.

Only the dumbest zombies go for Brians.

I just watched a movie following a black man in a zombie apocalypse.

It was the shortest movie I've ever watched.

In the event of a zombie apocalypse, how's first to lose his job?

a necromancer

TIL that the safest place during a massive zombie apocalypse is China.

Because they have a One-Zombie policy.

The one place to should head to straight away during a zombie apocalypse on a cruise ship.

A salad bar.

During a zombie apocalypse, where is the safest place to be?

Washington DC. There aren't any brains.

If a zombie apocalypse ever happened the world would end up having only zombies

and blondes

I used to scoff at the people preparing for the zombie apocalypse, thinking they were irrational alarmists

but then I had an encounter with corporate management and I now fear it may be too late.

What do you call a disabled person during a zombie apocalypse?

Meals on wheels...

Zombie apocalypses suck.

Everything comes back to bite you!

When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.

The zombies do.

There will never be a zombie apocalypse, because when Chuck Norris bites zombies, they turn back into humans.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the zombie apocalypse jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working zombie apocalypse piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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