Zodiac Jokes

Funniest Zodiac Short Jokes

Short zodiac jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The zodiac humour may include short horoscope jokes also.

1. Started smoking for this girl who told me she was into people with cancer Turns out she was talking about zodiacs. Anyway I've got three months to live.
2. What is your zodiac sign? Doctor: What is your zodiac sign?
   Patient: Cancer.
   Doctor: What a coincidence...
3. I had a friend whose zodiac sign was cancer. The way he died was very ironic... He got was eaten by a giant crab.
4. The zodiac sign of a friend of mine was cancer, which was very ironic because of how he died. He was eaten by a large crab.
5. Break up My boyfriend just broke up with me, he was sick and tired of my constant zodiac puns.
   It Taurus apart.
   I'm in Pisces typing this
6. Every Zodiac sign has a haircut . . . Except Cancer (in honor of my dad who lost his hair to chemo!)
7. Historians have proved that people with every zodiac sign survived the sinking of the Titanic... Except Leo
8. My barber is big into astrology, and told me that every zodiac sign corresponds to a certain hairstyle, except for one Cancer.
9. My wife died last week It's ironic because her zodiac symbol was cancer. She was killed by a giant crab
10. Last week I found out what my Zodiac was Apparently I'm a Cancer. I was devestated at first, because I was hoping to get Capricorn, but its really started to grow on me!

Share These Zodiac Jokes With Friends

Zodiac One Liners

Which zodiac one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with zodiac? I can suggest the ones about astrology and astrological sign.

1. Did you know that every zodiac sign has different hair? Well, besides cancer.
2. I believe every Zodiac sign has its own signature hairstyle. Except Cancer.
3. My wife left me because of my constant zodiac puns. It finally Taurus apart.
4. The real Zodiac Killer is... Cancer.
5. I'm cancer free! Now I'm dating a girl with different zodiac sign.
6. What were the Zodiac Killer's Plans for Vacation? To take a Cruz.
7. What zodiac sign doesn't have hair Cancer
8. Today my dad beat cancer. By the way what is your mom's zodiac sign?
9. What do the zodiac signs use to pay for coffee? Starbucks
10. I don't believe in zodiac signs... But that's only because I am a Taurus.
11. My grandmother was a Cancer zodiac, and ironically...
12. "what zodiac sign are you?" "dinosaur"
    "but this doesn't exist".
    "neither do others"
13. Thanos zodiac sign Libra, since he likes "balanced" things
14. I figured out the zodiac killer case It was cancer.
15. Did you know my grandma's zodiac is cancer Ironically she was killed by a giant crab

Signs Of The Zodiac Jokes

Here is a list of funny signs of the zodiac jokes and even better signs of the zodiac puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• The only two things that Zodiac signs get right: 1.Some people are twins
  2.Some people are cancer
• -What's your zodiac sign? -Tyrannosaurus.
  -But that's not even a real sign.
  -None of the zodiac signs are real.
• By asking 4 questions i can tell what your zodiac sign is 1. What's your favorite color?
  2. What's your mother's maiden name?
  3. What's your social security number?
  4. What's your birthday?
• One of my friends dates men based on their Zodiac sign. I told her that she must be a Cancer.
• Dark humour \- Doctor, what has the workup shown?
  \- What zodiac sign are you?
  \- Сancer
  \- Coincidence...
  ​
• Have you heard about the new Web MD zodiac? All the signs say Cancer.
• I'm sorry Madam, your child has cancer... ...as his zodiac sign.
• How do you speak to a deaf Ted Cruz? Use zodiac signs
• My wife's zodiac sign was cancer.. ..and it's quite ironic how she died really.
  She was executed
• How can you ask a Mexican if their zodiac sign is leo? Julio

Zodiac Cancer Jokes

Here is a list of funny zodiac cancer jokes and even better zodiac cancer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I believe in the Zodiac I'm a Pisces, by far my favorite type of fairy. Something a bit tragic, my grandmother was a Cancer, and she was actually killed by a giant tumor.

Zodiac Sign Jokes

Here is a list of funny zodiac sign jokes and even better zodiac sign puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• You are so sweet... ...is your zodiac sign caries?

Charming Humor Zodiac Jokes with Loads of Fun

What funny jokes about zodiac you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean star sign jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make zodiac pranks.