You Smell Jokes
135 you smell jokes and hilarious you smell puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about you smell that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest You Smell Short Jokes
Short you smell jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The you smell humour may include short smell jokes also.
- This girl I met on Tinder had a tattoo of a seashell on her innerthigh If you put your ear against it and listened closely, you could smell the sea.
- My girlfriend got a tattoo of a shell on her thigh Every time I lay my ear on it I can smell the sea.
- I happily dad joked my fiancé While on her way to work, she texted me saying she only put deodorant on one side.
To which I replied, "At least you won't smell half bad!" - I once met a girl with a tattoo of a conch on her inner thigh When I put my ear to it I could smell the sea
- I like the smell of mothballs. But it can sometimes be hard getting their little legs apart.
- Why did Dwayne 'the rock' Johnson's family get tested for COVID-19 They couldn't smell what the rock was cooking.
- My girlfriend got a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh… When I hold my ear up to it I can smell the ocean!
- I stopped showering or changing my clothes, as a precaution against COVID-19. If anybody gets within six feet of me, I know they must have lost their sense of smell.
- People shouldn't be shamed for their kinks. Me, I get really turned on when someone smells like musty sweat and coal. But I always get called a monster when I admit to being attracted to miners.
- I knew a girl with a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh She said if you put your ear up to it, you could smell the ocean.
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You Smell One Liners
Which you smell one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with you smell? I can suggest the ones about smells like and sense smell.
- New Teslas don't come with a new car smell They come with an Elon Musk.
- I like my women like I like my coffee I've never had coffee but it smells really nice
- Did you know Teslas don't have that new car smell? They have more of an Elon Musk.
- Teslas do not have New Car smell… They have an Elon Musk
- I love the smell of my f5 key... It is very refreshing
- What do you call new car smell in a Tesla? Elon's Musk
- Why does Piglet smell so bad? Because he plays with Pooh
- Why are people with foot fetishes always losers? They love the smell of defeat.
- What do you call a rapper that smells nice? Post Cologne
- What does a new tesla car smells like? Elon Musk
- What's blue and smells like red paint?
blue paint. - Today I got slapped for telling a girl her hair smelled nice. I hate being a dwarf.
- What's got no teeth and smells? The gearbox in the wife's car...
- What's blue and smells like red paint? Blue Paint.
- ps5 candle joke PS5 smells like you are not getting one !
You Smell Like Jokes
Here is a list of funny you smell like jokes and even better you smell like puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How is a gynecologist like a pizza delivery boy? They both get close enough to smell it, but if they eat it, they'll be fired.
- Why is a pizza delivery guy like a gynecologist? They're allowed to smell it, but they get in trouble if they eat it.
Teehee - What is green and smells like bacon? Kermit's fingers
- Two Snowmen are in a field... ...and one turns to the other and says "Yeah, you're right, it DOES smell like carrots."
My favorite joke - short, hysterical, and perfect for any occasion. - What does the Illuminati smell like? New World Odor
- I've always wondered what mothballs smelled like. But I could never get their tiny legs apart to find out.
- What is green and smells like a pig? Kermit the frog's finger
- What do Popeye's fingers smell like? Olive oil.
- I told a Chinese guy that they always smell like Chinese food. He said "aw that's lo, mein."
- What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit Farts
You Smell Bad Jokes
Here is a list of funny you smell bad jokes and even better you smell bad puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why do French ghosts smell so bad? Zay are, ow you say, "covered in sheet".
- Why do Farts Smell so Bad? So the deaf can enjoy them too.
- Why do black people smell bad? So blind people can hate them too
- What do you give a house that smells bad? A basemint
- My apartment was starting to smell bad so I bought myself a candle. It just makes scents.
- What do you call a fairy that smells bad Stinkerbell!
- Why does it smell so bad in Moscow? The prime minister has been Putin since 1999
- Why do farts smell so bad? So deaf people can appreciate them too
- Why did the Earth smell so bad after the meteor hit it? Because afterwards the dinosaurs were all egg stink.
- Why do girls wear make up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.
(Hopefully no one said that joke on here. I heard it from South Park a while ago)
Hilarious Fun You Smell Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter
What funny jokes about you smell you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean you stink jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make you smell pranks.
A Scotsman
A Scotsman and his wife walk past a swanky new restaurant. Did you smell that? she asked her husband. It smells absolutely incredible! Being a kind-hearted Scotsman, he thought what the h**...…I'll treat her!
So, they walked past the place again!
My wife has a tattoo of a shell on the inside of her thigh...
It's a really weird thing, when you lay your ear on it you smell the sea.
- I hope it came off right, thats an old joke they tell in my country
The Bacon Tree
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States, wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says...
"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell? Ees bacon, I theenk."
"Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. "
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon... Every imaginable kind of cured pork.
"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."
"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."
"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like
bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."
And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath;
"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"
"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it? "
"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees
Ees
Ees
Ees
Ees a ham bush...."
Two parrots were sitting on a perch
One says to the other... Do you smell fish?
The Bacon tree
Two Mexican brothers are lost in the desert.
They're hungry and thirsty, and have been walking for miles on end.
Suddenly, Jose yells at his brother. "Brother! Do you smell that? It smells like bacon!"
He rushes ahead, and sure enough, over the next dune, he sees it. A bacon tree. Glorious strips of crispy bacon, glistening in the sun, waiting to be eaten.
Jose runs head long at the tree, just as his brother climbs the dune behind him. Suddenly two machine guns pop out of the bacon tree and cut him down!
He turns to his brother, and with his last breath he yells out
"Brother! Is not a Bacon Tree!"
"Is..."
"Is a..."
"Is a Hambush..."
Scotsman and a new restaurant
A Scotsman and his wife walked past a swanky new restaurant.
"Did you smell that food?" she asked. "Wonderful!"
Being the 'kind-hearted Scotsman', he thought, "What the h**..., I'll treat her."
... So they walked past it again.
One snowman says to the other snowman,
"do you smell carrots?"
Two snowmen are talking
One says to the other, "Do you smell carrots?"
What do you smell if you (accidentally) burn a cat?
Purr-fume...
No cats were harmed in the making of this joke!
Two birds are sat on a perch.
Two birds are sat on a perch.
One turns to the other and says "Can you smell fish?"
I got slapped at the club the other day
I went dancing at a local club, hoping to get a little action since it's been a while. I met this gorgeous girl and asked her to dance, a little emboldened by the alcohol. After the first song with her body so close to mine, she leans in and says "You smell good! Whatcha got on?"
I said, "Well, I have a hard-on but I didn't know you could smell it."
Two birds are sitting on a perch.....
one looks to the other and says "Do you smell something fishy??"
A woman site down next to a man in a bar and says, "You smell good, What do you have on?"
The man says, "I have a hard on but I didn't know you could smell it."
5 penny joke
Place the first penny on the table..."Can you smell that....that's a scent."
Place the second penny...."Can you see any fruit....that's a pair"
Place the third penny...."Can you see any cars? Three Lincolns."
Place the fourth down..."Can you see any snakes? Four copperheads.
Place the fifth down..."Can you see any p**...?"
Scoop them all up..."Not for five cents you can't."
A new supermarket opened near me a few weeks ago.
They're trying a new thing: immersion! For example, when you stop by the deli you can smell fresh grass and hear cows mooing, at the fish section you smell sea salt and feel a small bit of spray on your face, and at the fruit stall you can see mist on the apples, and smell fields of oranges and pears.
I don't get toilet roll there anymore.
Now that I have quit smoking i see more and more each day how its like an old relationship...
You smell her perfume, see her out with another man
and all you can think of is the good times and
not how she took part of your life away.
You smell like trash..... Can I take you out?
I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on?
I said I've got a hard on but I didn't know you could smell it..
You know if you smell feet and your nose is running
Then you just might be upside down
Smoking a cigarette
Have you ever smoked a cigarette in your car and tried to throw it out the window and a minute later you smell something and turn around to find your grandma f**... herself in the back seat?
Two dyslexic kids
Two dyslexic kids were sitting on a sofa. One asks the other "can you smell gas?" The other replies "Seriously dude? I can't even smell my own name".
A Man and Wife in Church
Wife: I've just made a silent f**...... can you smell it, what should we do?
Husband: Turn up your hearing aid!
Two snowmen in a garden,
one says to the other, "can you smell carrots?".
A man and a woman were sitting next to each other in bar.
They were having a casual conversation when she suddenly leaned over and asked him, "You smell amazing, what do you have on?"
The man smiled an impish grin and replied, "I have a hard-on but I didn't know you could smell it!"
Two dogs are sitting in a field.
First dog turns to the second dog and says d**... man you smell like s**...! Have you been rolling in s**...?
Yep.
Wow. That is foul. Is it like a compulsive behavior?
Nope.
Do you do it to cover your scent up, like to ward off predators?
Nope.
Is it some weird f**... that gets you off?
Nope.
Then why would you roll in such pungent p**...!?
So I can sit in peace and not be bothered. Figures it wouldn't work on a German Shepherd
The smell of rain
Every loves the smell of rain. So fresh, so clean. But in actuality you can't actually smell rain. What you smell is the world around you.
Way back in the day humans used to have to actually hunt their food. So if you were chasing down a deer and it started to rain you could easily lose the scent. So humans evolved to smell better in the rain.
And that is why your farts smell worse in the shower.
How do you smell once you get of bed?
Like sheet.
Can you smell mothballs? I can't.
I can never get their legs far enough apart.
On a date, she said "You smell nice. What have you got on?"
"I've got a hard on. But I didn't know you could smell it."
Two snowmen are standing next to each other in a field when one looks over to the other and asks:
"Do you smell carrots?"
What's it called when you make sure you smell real good before getting a camera shoved up your bbutt?
Cologne-oscopy
Two snowmen are standing in a snowy field...
And after 3 hours of complete silence, one turns to the other and asks
"Can you smell carrots?"
Two dyslexics are sitting in a room
One says Can you smell gas?
The other replies Smell gas?! I can't even smell my own name!
You know that mouth-watering sensation you get when you smell a steak cooking on the grill?
Is that what happens to vegans when they mow the grass?
My girlfriend and I walked passed a "swanky" new restaurant last night...
"Did you smell that food" she asked, "incredible." being the gentleman that I am I thought "what the heck, I'll treat her, so we walked passed it again....
My wife has a seashell tattooed on the inside of her leg
if you lay your ear on it, you smell the sea
Two birds are sitting on a perch...
The first one says, "Hey... do you smell fish?"
What did one snowman say to the other snow man?
Do you smell carrot
Two birds on a perch
One turns to the other and asks,
Can you smell fish?
How to freak her out
I love walking up to women I barely know, hug them and sniff loudly followed by me saying, "You smell so much better when you are awake."
*sniff...sniff* Guy: "Honey! Do you smell that?"
Girl: "No babe."
Guy: "Yeah me neither, start cooking."
Darling, do you smell anything?
SO: no?
Me: me neither. Start cooking.....
Wow you smell nice today Jim, what did you put on?
Clean underwear
Sitting at a bar and a friend leans quite close to me as she get up to go to the washroom. Jees, Bill you smell good. What have you go on?
Actually, I have a hard on but I didn't know you could smell it!
My Crush and I on our first date, and this happens:
He: You smell good!
Me, being the nervous fool I am: Thanks, *I use both my nostrils. *
Two snowmen
Two snowmen are walking through a field when one turns to the other one and asks, "do you smell carrots?"
Why is a dog man's best friend and not a wife?
Because the later you come home, the more excited the dog gets to see you.
Because if you smell like another women, the dog gets curious.
Don't believe me? Lock the dog and the wife in the garage for an hour and see for yourself.
so these two snowmen are standing next to each other....
first snowman turns to the other one and says, "do you smell carrots?"
Teacher: can you see god
student: no
teacher: can you feel god
student no
teacher: can you smell god
student: no
teacher so god isn't real
*hand goes up*
Student" can you see your brain
teacher no
student can you feel your brain
teacher no
student: can you smell your brain
teacher: no
student: so you have no brain
Post your pickup lines. I'll start: Girl, you smell like....
Girl, you smell like an encouraging note my 3rd grade teacher wrote with a purple gelpen in the front of my Goosebumps book! Can I get your number?
The wife asked, "why do you smell like vanilla?"
I don't know, the stripper smelled like orange.
AXE products claim if you smell good, women will be all over you, but that can't be right
I've never had any problems with my nose and I'm still single.
Being a janitor doesn't leave you smelling great
It adds a whole new meaning to eau de toilette
2 snowmen in a field
one turns to the other and says, "Do you smell carrots?"
What does an Italian say to you when they suddenly realize you smell bad?
EUREKA!
Daam gurl r you a Christmas tree?
'Cause you never leave.
And you smell.
have you smelled my new seeded aftershave?
The birds love it.
So I was at my local dyslexia meeting...
And my friend turned to me and said, "can you smell gas?"
I replied, "are you kidding? I can't even smell my own name."
Two birds are sat on a perch, when one says to the other..
"Do you smell fish?"
A woman walks up to a man at the bar...
A woman walks up to a man at the bar and says "You smell lovely, what do you have on?" he replies " I have a hard on, but I didn't think you could smell that."
What's step one to wooing a geologist?
Make sure you smell gneiss
Two parrots are sat on a perch...
..one turns to the other and says, 'is it just me, or can you smell fish'?
What does the rock say when he goes down on his woman?
IF YOU SMELLALALALALA
Do you smell gas?
A plumber and his apprentice are working on a house when the plumber turns and says
"do you smell gas?"
The apprentice replies - "no, I can't even smell my own name"
Two snowmen were standing in a field, and one said to the other 'Can you smell carrot?' The second replied, 'No, but I can taste coal.'
One snowman said to another,
"By any chance, do you smell carrots?"
You know its a bad lbm when.
You smell the sound.
s**... random OC
Yesterday as usual we brushed our teeth and I kissed my wife good night. After the kiss..
Wife: Are you an ox?
Me: What?
Wife: You smell "Oxy" Clean
:|
if you smell rat among yourselves..
that's because you can smell yourself
What's the easiest way to get to Texas from Tenessee?
Go west till you smell it.
And south till you step in it.
2 dyslexic men driving along the motorway
The driver says to the passenger: "can you smell petrol?"
The passenger says: "smell petrol? I can hardly smell my own name"
Hear about the dyslexic chefs?
One said " can you smell gas?"
"Very funny" said the other,
"You know I can't even smell my own name!"
If you smell burnt toast, you may be having a s**......
But if you also smell bacon then you're probably having breakfast.
Was out a drive with my dyslexic mate...
I notice there's something not right.
"Can you smell petrol?" I say
"Smell petrol?! I can't even smell my name"
9 Clowns in an elevator, one of them silently farts.
One leans over to another and wispers..."You smell something funny?".
A snowman tells another snowman.
Snowman 1: Guess what?
Snowman 2: What?
Snowman 1: You smell like carrots
ps. not sure if this joke has been posted before
A dog is better than a wife.
A dog finds it interesting when you smell of another dog. A dog thinks it's funny if you come home drunk. Still not convinced? Lock your dog and your wife in the shed for an hour and note, when you let them out, which is most pleased to see you.
Two mexicans are walking in a desert....
and are extremely thirsty and hungry, and are out of food and water. As they continue on their journey to reach their homeland, Carlos says to Juan in broken english, "I don't think we es going to make it, Juan." Juan replies, "We must keep trying Carlos, we es got no choice."
As Carlos and Juan approach a big hill of sand in the desert, Carlos immediately smells bacon. "Juan!!! You smell that? Smells like.... Bacon!!!!" Carlos replies reluctantly, "How could you just, smell bacon out here? Make no sense Juan." Juan replies, "Es a bacon tree! I can tell!" Carlos replies, "No Juan, es a mirage!! Es messing with your mind!"
Juan would not listen. "Ok Carlos, your choice." Juan proceeded to climb the hill, while Carlos waited down at the bottom for him, knowing that this was way to good to be true.
As Juan disappeared from Carlos's view, Carlos heard many gunshots. Terrified and confused, he didn't know what to do. Slowly, he saw Juan climb, with gunshot wounds, over the edge of the hill. "Carlos, don't go up there!!"
"Es no bacon tree." "Es a.... Es a hambush."
Two dyslectic fellas sat in the kitchen...
Fella 1: "Ere, can you smell gas?"
Fella 2: "Who me? No... I can't even smell my own name!"
What did the Lesbian say to the Fish?
You smell familiar.
What do you call it when you smell your own f**...?
A smellfie.
If you smell like stale beer,chicken nuggets, and farts
You might be a white supremenist!
