The Best 35 You Fat Jokes

Following is our collection of funny You Fat jokes. There are some you fat jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these you fat puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest You Fat Jokes and Puns

Call a girl beautiful 1,000 times and she won't think twice...

Call a girl fat once and she'll always remember.

Because elephants never forget

Your mom is so fat she starts the alphabet with the letter "O"...

O B C D...

If someone calls you Fat, just ignore them.

You are bigger than that!

"I love you lots snuggles" said my girlfriend

"And I love you tons" I replied.
"Wow fine, you don't have a nickname for me?" She said angrily.
Sometimes I swear the fat cunt's going deaf.

Why is Japan the healthiest country in the world?

Because last time they had a fat man 80,000 people died


I went to the pub last night and saw a fat chick dancing on a table.

I said, "Nice legs."

The girl giggled and said with a smile, "Do you really think so."

I said "Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."

Yo mama's so fat

she went out in high heels and came back in flip flops

Yo mama so fat. . .

I swerved my car to avoid hitting her and ran out of gas.

I wish I could see what it was like to be fat for just one day.

I'm tired of being fat every day.

How can you tell if your girlfriend is getting too fat?

If she fits in your wife's clothes.

Yo mama so fat

Thanos had to snap twice.

You can explore you fat reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean you fat dad jokes. There are also you fat puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Speaking of a big fat butt!

A girl takes her big fat cat to the vet.

"My cat is very fat, she says.

"Alright," says the vet. "I will look at him."

The vet picks up the cat and examines its teeth. Then she looks at its eyes. Then into its ears.

Finally, she turns to the girl and says, I'm very sorry. I'm going to have to put your cat down."

"Oh no! Because he's so fat?"

"Yes, says the doctor. My arms are very tired."

What do you get when you eat 3.14 slices of cake?

Fat. You get fat.

What? Like I would make a pie joke on my cake day?

Amy Schumer gets mad when people describe her as fat, slutty, and disgusting..

because she doesn't like when people steal her material.

Yo mama so fat...

Yo mama so fat she has her own gravity

But she so ugly people are still repelled by her

Two fat ladies walk into a bar

They order drinks, in a thick accent.

"You two ladies from Ireland?" asks the bartender.

Offended, one of them replies "Wales!"

"Oh I'm so sorry," says the bartender, "Are you two whales from Ireland?"

Women say their number one fear of online dating is the guy will be a serial killer. Men say their number one fear is the woman will be fat.

Sir, I think we have a case of human traficking

An American flight attendant sees a suspicious looking couple on board and reports it to the captain.
"Sir, I think we have a case of human traficking! There is an extremely sexy female passenger on board, who looks quite frightened, almost like she has no idea what is going to happen next. The man she is with is a fat old slob and old enough to be her father. He's very sleazy, very sullen and although he speaks English, it is impossible to make out what he's trying to say."

The captain sighed and replied, "look Susan, we've been through this many times before, this is Air Force One..."

Stop bullying fat people, it isn't funny

They have enough on their plate anyway.


Never make fun of a fat girl with a lisp, she's probably thick and tired of it.

Don't make fun of fat people with lisps...

They're thick and tired of it

What does Tumblr and KFC's chicken have in common?

They both contain high amounts of trans fats.

Why is Japan afraid of Kim Jong-un?

because they remember what the last fat man did to them

How to be insulting

A man goes to a bar and sees a fat girl dancing on a table.

He walks over to her and says, "Wow, nice legs!"

She is flattered and replies, "You really think so?"

The man says, "Oh definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."

Finally my winter fat is gone

Now I have spring rolls

I went to the doctors with hearing problems...

He said "Can you describe the symptoms?"
So I replied "Homers fat, and Marge has blue hair"

For health reasons, my doctor says I should avoid trans fats

I'm gonna miss tumblr

Yo momma is so fat ...

She took a jump in the pool, they found water on Mars.

Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times and she won't believe you.

Tell a woman she's fat once and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.

I bought a pug for my wife.

Despite the bulging eyes, wrinkles and layers of fat, the pug seemed to like her.

What do you call a fat psychic?

A four chin teller.

Fat shaming is wrong.

They have enough on their plate already

My friend told me about a wonder food that he discovered that contains protein, fiber, and good fats

"That's nuts!" I exclaimed.

My 7 Year Old Cousin just told me this

yo mamas so fat when she fell down no one was laughing but the ground was cracking up

Yo momma is so vegan and fat...

..that she ate a meal and got arrested for deforestation.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the you fat jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working you fat piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes