Yankee Jokes
45 yankee jokes and hilarious yankee puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about yankee that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking for some good old-fashioned Yankee jokes? This article will provide you with a selection of jokes poking fun at Yankee fans, Yankee candles, Yankee Red Sox, or Yankee doodles. We have carefully selected some of the best jokes to make fun of Yankee fans, and to put a smile on the faces of southerners and others. Enjoy reading some of the most hilarious and manlier jokes about the Yankee culture. Read on to get a good laugh!
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Funniest Yankee Short Jokes
Short yankee jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The yankee humour may include short baseball jokes also.
- I was visiting NYC for the first time when a black guy walked up to me and asked if the Yankees won I said, "yeah man, you're free!"
- So this black guys stopped me on the subway and asked "did the Yankees win?" I looked him in the eye and said "Yes, it's ok, you're free now"
- I was walking through Times Square the other day when a black guy came up to me and asked if the Yankees had won... ...So I said, "Yeah! You're free!!"
- My Uncle said this now that there are two popes Two popes walk into a bar with Yankee caps on.
The bartender says, "Didn't you guys use to be Cardinals?" - I was in NYC and a black guy asked me if the Yankees won. I replied, "Yeah, man, you're free."
- I was walking down the street one day in New York City when I was approached by a black guy. He asked me "Did the Yankees Win?" I said "Well yeah, you're free"
- Sing to the tune of "Yankee Doodle"... Helen Keller went to town,
A-ridin' on a pony,
Stuck a feather in her hat
and called it "Hunngunnggunufffungg" - What's the difference between a Yankee zoo and a Southern zoo? The Yankee zoo will have the name of the animal and its Latin name. The Southern zoo will have the name of the animal and a recipe.
- How many yankees fans does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They'll just stand in the dark talking about how good the old one was.
- I was looking up some baseball history, *I mean, if you know - you know* ..
But the best way to describe the lineup of the 1935 New York Yankees in one word is, 'ruthless'.
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Yankee One Liners
Which yankee one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with yankee? I can suggest the ones about north and diner.
- The New York Yankees Officially Sign Adrian Peterson They needed a good switch hitter.
- What do you call an American Drawing? A Yankee Doodle.
- What does a patriotic chicken say? Yankee doodle doo!
I'll see myself out - New York Yankees sign Adrian Peterson They were looking for a good switch hitter
- Who holds the record for most saves at Yankee Stadium? Billy Graham
- What's the name of the hat Jewish people are always seen wearing? Oh yeah a Yankees hat.
- What does a patriotic chicken say? Yankee doodle doo!
(so sorry) - Where does Yankees pitcher Luis Cessa swim? In the Cessa pool.
- I got fired from Yankee candle factory because I refused to work wick ends!
- What is Daddy Yankee's favorite outfit? Rompers, rompers, rompers
- What did Daddy Yankee order at the Italian restaurant? Reggaetoni!
- What costs more to put holes in than anything else? The Yankees' lineup!
- What is the definition of a Yankee? Same as a q**... but you do it yourself.
- What's a Yankee? It's like a q**... except you do it yourself.
- What's the definition of a Yankee? It's like a q**..., but you do it to yourself.
Yankee Doodle Jokes
Here is a list of funny yankee doodle jokes and even better yankee doodle puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Yankee doodle keep it up, Yankee doodle dandy... Yankee doodle went to town and got himself a handy.
Yankee Stadium Jokes
Here is a list of funny yankee stadium jokes and even better yankee stadium puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Did you hear that the Yankees cannot sell bottled beer in Yankee Stadium this year? They lost their opener.
Yankee Red Sox Jokes
Here is a list of funny yankee red sox jokes and even better yankee red sox puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Weird how the Red Sox went so long without a World Series win after selling Babe Ruth to the Yankees You'd think they'd have been more ruthless.
Yankee Fan Jokes
Here is a list of funny yankee fan jokes and even better yankee fan puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- For all the baseball fans.. How does a Yankee fan change a lightbulb?
They don't. They just talk about how great the past 27 were.
Laughable Yankee Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles
What funny jokes about yankee you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean quickie jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make yankee pranks.
A man is visiting friends in Alabama and decides he's needs a drink so he goes to a local bar
He walks in and orders a glass of wine. Everyone sitting around the bar looks up expecting to see a flamboyant yankee. The bartender eyes him suspiciously and asks you ain't from around here are you?
No sir, He says, I'm from Minnesota
What the h**... do you do in Minnesota the bartender asks.
Im a taxidermist! The man replies.
What the h**... is that!? The bartender asks.
The guy says nervously I umm, mount dead animals
The bartender smiles and shouts out to the whole bar it's ok fellas, he's one of us!
A guy walks into a r**... bar.
A guy walks into a r**... bar and orders a glass of wine. Everyone sitting around the bar looks up expecting to see some flamboyant Yankee. The bartender eyes him suspiciously and asks, "You ain't from around here, are you?"
"No sir," the guy says, "I'm from North Dakota."
"North Dakota?" the bartender asks. "What the h**... you do in North Dakota?"
"I'm a taxidermist," the guy replies.
"A taxidermist, what the h**... is that?" the bartender asks.
The guy says nervously, "Um, I mount dead animals."
The bartender smiles and shouts out to the whole bar, "It's okay fellas, he's one of us!"
The Pope and Hillary Clinton
The Pope and Hillary Clinton are on the same stage in Yankee Stadium in front of a huge crowd.
The Pope leans towards Hillary and said, "Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in the crowd go wild with joy? The joy will not be a momentary display , but will go deep into their hearts and they'll forever speak of this day and rejoice."
Hillary replied, "I seriously doubt that with one little wave of your hand that is possible; show me."
His Holiness then backhanded Hillary and knocked her off the stage! The crowd roared and cheered wildly and there was happiness throughout the land.
A Southern lady sits down next to a Yankee businesswoman on a plane. Trying to be friendly, the Southerner asks, "So, where ya'all from?"
The Yankee sniffs in disdain and replies, "Where I'm from, we don't end our sentences in prepositions!"
The lady, a little shocked by the rudeness says, "Aight, where ya'all from, b**...?"
A plane from J.F.K. is coming in to land at a rural airport in Arkansas at midnight.
Mouthy pilot turns to his co-pilot, winks & says "watch this"......
"Pilot to control tower......hey there h**..., guess who!!"
Control tower switches off the airport lights.....
"Control tower to pilot....... Hey there Yankee, guess *where!!*"
An American and an Indian board a plane to LAX,
Indian sits next to American.
American asks: What kind of "ian" are you?
- What?
- I said What kind of "ian" are you?
- I don't understand your question.
- s**...! Are you Cambodian, Indian or Iranian?
- Oh! I am Indian.
2 hours passed without a word.
Indian asks: What kind of "key" are you?
- What?
- Are you a monkey, donkey, or Yankee?
The Texan and the Yankee
A Texan and a y**... are walking on a beach when they come across a genie's lamp. The genie promises to grant them each a single wish. The Texan thinks and says "I want a wall two miles high and two miles deep around Texas. Nothing can get in and nothing can get out." The y**... asks the genie, "so nothing can get in or out?" "Yes," says the genie, "two miles high it stands and two miles deep."
"Fill it."
Yankee candle, known for its fragranced candle line of products has revealed it is making an odourless candle for the first time ever
It makes no scents
What's a Yankee?
The same as a q**..., only you do it yourself.
If you can read this...
India Mike November Echo Victor Echo Romeo Golf Oscar November November Alpha Golf India Victor Echo Yankee Oscar Uniform Uniform Papa November Echo Victor Echo Romeo Golf Oscar November November Alpha Lima Echo Tango Yankee Oscar Uniform Delta Oscar Whiskey November November Echo Victor Echo Romeo Golf Oscar November November Alpha Romeo Uniform November Alpha Romeo Oscar Uniform November Delta Alpha November Delta Delta Echo Sierra Echo Romeo Tango Yankee Oscar Uniform.
Yankee Doodle can use other names too
Helen Keller went to town while riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it 'UGLABERPL'
Adolf h**... went to town while riding on a pony, when someone stuck a feather in his hat, he threw it on the ground and screamed 'NIEN!'
A man is on a tour of the Yankee Candle Factory
A man was taking a tour of the Yankee Candle factory when he suddenly saw an incredibly large machine and had no idea what it was. he asked the employee giving the tour what it was, and the employee replied, Oh! That's our patented Yankee Candle Maker 5000™️! The man seemed content and said to himself, Oh, that makes scents.
Southern
A University of Alabama student was visiting a Yankee relative in Boston over the holidays. He went to a large party and met a pretty co-ed. He was attempting to start up a conversation with the line, "Where y'all go to school? " The coed, of course, was not overly impressed with his grammar or southern drawl, but did answer his question. "Yale," she replied. The Alabama student took a big, deep breath and shouted, "WHERE Y'ALL GO TO SCHOOL?? "
what do apples, dish washer soap, the muppets, a black guy, beer, yankee candels, and the keyboard on a flip phone all have in common?
they all help make a really convoluted joke.
The Knees and the key.
My roommate in college was born in China. Once, at a get-together, someone asked him, What kind of 'knees' are you?
He asked, What do you mean?
You know — Chinese, Japanese…
He said, Oh, I am Chinese. What kind of key are you?
Key? they asked.
You know — Yankee, donkey, monkey…
Whats the difference between a Yankee and Native American?
If you stick a feather in a Yankee's hat, you have to call it macaroni.
What is a yankee?
It's a q**... but by yourself.
