The Best 30 Yahweh Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Yahweh jokes. There are some yahweh buddha jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these yahweh god puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Yahweh Jokes and Puns

I told my buddy that Jewish people call god by a different name

He was like, "No way!"

I was like, "Yahweh"

A Jehovah's Witness knocks on a Jew's door.

Jew: "Can I help you?"

Witness: "Hello sir, I'm here to tell you about the great Lord Jehovah!"

Jew: "Is that what you call him? You know, we have a name for him too..."

Witness: "No way?!"

Jew: "Yahweh."

I told my friend that Jewish people call God by a different name.

He said, "No way!", to which I replied, "Yahweh".

Yahweh joke, I told my friend that Jewish people call God by a different name.

Joseph decides it's time to tell Jesus the truth....

Since Jesus is a teenager, Joseph thinks he can handle it. He tells Jesus that he's not really his father, in a technical sense.

Jesus is incredulous. He can't believe it. He asks who his father really is.

Joseph explains to Jesus that he's the son of god. Jesus can't even comprehend this. He can only manage to stammer out "No way"

Joseph looks at him and says "Yahweh..."

How do you measure the mass of God?

Yahweh it of course.


A Jewish man was talking to a Hindu man

Jew: Yeah, so in my religion we only believe in one God.

Hindu: No way!

Jew: Yahweh

Two surfer dudes are sitting in church

One turns to the other and says, "DUDE! Did you know God has a name?"

"Dude, NO WAY!!!"

"Yahweh!"

Yahweh joke, Two surfer dudes are sitting in church

I'm an atheist but…

If I found out God was real I'd be like No way . And then God would be like Yahweh

I told my friend that I talked to God.

He said, "Pfft...No way."

I said "Yahweh."

"Did you know that there's another, Hebrew name for God?"

"No way!"

"Yahweh."

Is there a god?

1. No way
2. Yahweh

You can explore yahweh jehovah reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean yahweh savior dad jokes. There are also yahweh puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Jesus sits down at the Last Supper with his disciples.

He rises and addresses them: "I'm the son of God."
"No way!" they say.
"Yahweh."

A man invites his Jewish friend out for lunch

Upon arriving at the restaurant, his friend says "I'm not sure I can eat here. Is Burger King kosher?" The man waved his hand dismissively and says "Don't worry, it's Burger King: Have it Yahweh."

What do you believe in?

I believe in God

No way!

Yahweh.

Moses came down

Moses came down from Mount Sinai and announced to the people, "I just got done speaking with God." "No way!" the townspeople shouted. "Yahweh."

What is the slogan for Burger King in Israel?

Have it Yahweh

Yahweh joke, What is the slogan for Burger King in Israel?

Two stoners are talking about religion, "Dude. Did you know that like, uh, God, he has a name?" The other replies, "Really dude? No way!"

The first answers, "Yahweh!"

I said I was the son of God

They said No way!
I said Yahweh!

I asked my very religious mother for the new iPhone...

And she said she'd get me a smartphone, but I had a choice. If I start going to church, I would get the iPhone I wanted. If I didn't go to church, I would get a crappy low end android.

She said it was Yahweh or the Huawei.


Jesus was talking with the 12 apostles..

He said Hey Guys, I can walk on water!
They responded No way
And he said back Yahweh!

Some high schoolers are on the playground.

A new kid walks up. They say whats your name? He says God. They say "NO way!!! He says Yahweh

Bad religious joke I created.

One day Jesus is talking to god and says,

"Hey dad, guess what I did today?"

God: "What?"

Jesus: "I walked on water."

God: "No way."

Jesus: "Yahweh!"

Badum, tss

What did the Egyptians say to Moses when he parted the Red Sea?

No way!!!

What did Moses say?

Yahweh.

As a Jew I told my pagan friend that I only had one God.

Him: No way
Me: Yahweh!

Didn't know so many Hispanic guys were Jewish

But I keep hearing them say Yahweh

How do you find out how heavy God is?

Yahweh him.

When Jesus rose from the dead, everyone said No way

Jesus responded Yahweh

Jesus to the Jews:

I am the son of God.
Jews: No way...
Jesus: Yahweh.

What's the slogan of Jewish proselytizers?

Yahweh or the highway.

Classic joke at my Catholic High School

I went up to a man and said "Jesus is the messiah"

He said "No way"

I said "Yah-weh"

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the yahweh hasidic jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working yahweh forgiveness piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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