wrestler Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious wrestler puns

A blind man walks into a bar

A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him and says, "Hey, wanna hear a blond joke?"
The man said to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blond. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler, and he's blond. The bouncer is blond. The man sitting over to your left is also blond. Still wanna tell that blond joke?"
The blind man was silent for a moment and then said, "Nah, I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."

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Three women sat discussing their husbands and their sex lives.

"My husband's a wrestler," said the first. "He's really strong and aggressive in bed."

"My husband's an artist," said the second. "He's really gentle and sensitive."

"My husband's an IBM salesman," said the third. "He sits on the edge of the bed and tells me how good it's going to be when I finally get it."

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Wrestling Match

A Ukrainian and a Newfoundland wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic Gold medal.
Before the final match, the Newfie wrestler's trainer came to him and said,
"Now, don't forget all the research we've done on this Ukie. He's never lost a match, because of this pretzel hold he has. So, whatever you do, do not let him get you in that hold!! If he does, you're finished !!"
The Newfie nodded in acknowledgment........
As the match started, the Newfie and the Ukrainian circled each other several times, looking for an opening.
All of a sudden, the Ukie lunged forward,......... grabbing the Newfie and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold. A sigh of disappointment arose from the crowd and the trainer buried his face in his hands, for he knew all was lost.
He couldn't bare to watch the inevitable happen.....
Suddenly, there was a scream, then a cheer from the crowd and the trainer raised his eyes just in time to watch the Ukrainian go flying up in the air.
His back hit the mat with a thud and the Newfoundlander collapsed on top of him, making the pin and winning the match.
The trainer was astounded !!..........
When he finally got his wrestler alone, he asked:
"How the hell did you ever get out of that hold?? No one has ever done it before!!...."
The wrestler answered: "Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold
but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair of testicles, right in front of my face. I had nothing to lose, so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could !!"
The trainer exclaimed: "So, THAT'S what finished him off !!...." "Not really"............. replied the Newfie....... . . . . . . . . . . . . "You'd be amazed how strong you get, when you bite your own nuts !!"...

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"Dress for the job you want, not the job you have." --career advancement program at my job

Then they fired me for violating the dress code at the bank. Hypocrites. How am I ever going to become a sumo wrestler now?

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My wife isn't much of a wrestler

But man you should see her box.

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If wrestlers have biceps, and bodybuilders have triceps, what do surgeons have?

Forceps
(I hate my shit life)

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Did you hear about the wrestler who was beaten by a vampire?

He was down for the count

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BLIND, BLOND & BALLSY

A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him and says, "Hey, wanna hear a blond joke?"
The man said to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blond. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler, and he's blond. The bouncer is blond. The man sitting over to your left is also blond. Still wanna tell that blond joke?"
The blind man was silent for a moment and then said, "Nah, I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."

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Blind man and a blonde joke

A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him and says, "Hey, wanna hear a blond joke?"

The man said to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blond. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler, and he's blond. The bouncer is blond. The man sitting over to your left is also blond. Still wanna tell that blond joke?"

The blind man was silent for a moment and then said, "Nah, I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."

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What do you call a Mexican wrestler that only fights during his 12:00 break?

A lunchador.

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One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus and drove off along the route:

No problems for the first few stops.
A few people got on, a few got off and things went generally well.

At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on.

Six foot eight, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground.

He glared at the driver and said. "Big John doesn't pay!" And sat down at the back.

Did I mention that the driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek?
Well, he was.

Naturally, he didn't argue with Big John, but he wasn't happy about it.

The next day the same thing happened...
Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down.

And the next day and the one after that, and so forth.

This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him.

Finally he could stand it no longer.

He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo and all that good stuff.

By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself.

So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said. "Big John doesn't pay!"

The driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed. "And why not?"

With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied. "Big John has a bus pass!"

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If a wrestler pins you while having sex with your wife...

Is that a cuckhold?

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What's the difference between a WWE wrestler and a soccer player?

A WWE wrestler will get up after faking an injury.

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What's the worst thing about being a professional alligator wrestler?

You have to start off by being an amateur alligator wrestler.

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A blind man walks into a bar and sits on a stool. He orders a drink and says "hey, wanna here a good blonde joke"...

The barmaid says "before you do, I should tell you my name is big Bertha, I'm the landlady and an ex wrestler and I'm a blonde. Two feet away is big Brenda, she's a karate teacher and could squish you flat in a second, she's also a blonde, and in the corner over there is big Belinda, she's a shot putter by profession and also a blonde. Are you sure you wanna tell this joke?"

The blind man sighs and says "no I don't think I'll bother, I don't want to have to explain the damn thing three times over"

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(Joke my 7 ear old brother made) What does a wrestler say when someone tells a bad joke?

You gotta work on your punchline.

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Hank Hill should become a wrestler.

He's all about pro-pain.

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You guys hear about that badass wrestler that loves ice cream?

They call him Coldstone Steve Austin.

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How do wrestlers enter the arena?

Through the Luchadoor.

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A blind man walks into a bar, taps the man next him and says,

"Hey, wanna hear a blond joke?"
The man said to the blind man, "Look buddy, I'm blond. The man behind me is a 400-pound professional wrestler, and he's blond. The bouncer is blond. The man sitting over to your left is also blond. Still wanna tell that blond joke?"
The blind man was silent for a moment and then said, "Nah, I wouldn't want to have to explain it five times."

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A boy is asking santa for a heavy sweater for christmas present

so santa send him a sumo wrestler

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Which wrestler has the finisher that stings the most?

Stone Cold Steve Irwin.

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What is the difference between a gay porn star and a male wrestler?

A gay porn star beats off men for other men to watch. A male wrestler beats on men for other men to watch

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A scary thing to do to your girlfriend on Halloween...

is ask her if she's going as a sumo wrestler.
Spooky!

Shout out to my friend Ryan Smith for this joke

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What do you call a dead Australian Wrestler?

Stone Cold Steve Irwin

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What's the difference between a wrestler and a porn star?

One has a finisher and the other one finishes in her

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They say Ronda Rousey isn't much of a wrestler...

But you'll be amazed when you see her box.

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Why did the wrestler always carry an umbrella on him?

Because he was the raining champ.

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Who is the best Warrior Princess wrestler?

John Xena!

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My wife got stolen by a wrestler the other day.

he used his finishing move. The Cuckhold

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what's a wrestlers least favorite snack?

A pretzel

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I want to become a Christian pro wrestler and my name will be...

god slam it.

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Who's Gordon Ramsay's favorite wrestler?

It's FOCKING STONE COLD

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How does a Mexican wrestler enter a room?

Through the Lucha-door.

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What do you call a Muslim Wrestler?

I-SLAM!!!

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What are the most funny Wrestler jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Wrestler? Well, here are the best Wrestler dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Wrestler pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes