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Wrestling Jokes

88 wrestling jokes and hilarious wrestling puns to laugh out loud. Read sport jokes about wrestling that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Discover funny wrestling jokes about gladiators, wrestlers, and arm wrestling! Read about kid wrestlers, high school wrestling matches, and championship gladiators! Enjoy hilarious one-liners and Rorschach jokes sure to make everyone laugh!

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Funniest Wrestling Short Jokes

Short wrestling jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The wrestling humour may include short wrestler jokes also.

  1. Superman once arm wrestled Chuck Norris loser had to wear their underwear outside their pants.
  2. I just made my new wrestling name. My name is Off In Church... Because no one beats off in church
  3. My son walked in on me and my wife "wrestling" on the bed. We call it "wrestling" because he can't pronounce jiu-jitsu.
  4. For my late grandfather, his favorite joke. "My wife, she can't wrestle..." "But you should see her box!"
    And he'd laugh. And laugh. And laugh.
  5. What's the difference between US Politics and WWE? one is a predetermined charade that takes a tremendous amount of willingness to suspend disbelief
    the other is pro wrestling.
  6. The waitress asked me if I wanted a box for our leftovers. I said no but I'll wrestle you for it.
  7. If I had to wrestle Satan and was allowed to pick a partner, I'd pick Bob Ross He always knew how to beat the devil.
  8. Chuck Norris and Superman once had an arm wrestling contest Loser has to wear his underwear above his pants.
  9. John Cena gets knocked out during a wrestling match 3 hours later he wakes up in a hospital
    John: (slowly) Where am I?
    Nurse: I. C. U
    John: No you can't!!
  10. I went through three magazines on a train yesterday. I'd killed a dozen people by the time they wrestled the gun off me.

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Wrestling One Liners

Which wrestling one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with wrestling? I can suggest the ones about professional wrestler and martial arts.

  1. Why do sumo wrestles shave their legs? So that you can tell them apart from feminists
  2. Two silk worms are in a wrestling match It ended in a tie.
  3. What's better than watching a woman wrestle? Seeing her box.
  4. My friend used to be addicted to mud wrestling... He's 6 months clean now.
  5. Who decided to call it "Dwayne Johnson's Wrestling Career" instead of... Classic Rock?
  6. Q: How did the cannibal get caught at the wrestling match? A: He yelled "Food fight!"
  7. Wrestling... A sport where people without pants fight for a belt.
  8. My wife can't wrestle.. But you should see her box.
  9. Midget wrestling... ...seems like it would be a pretty short career.
  10. No wrestling event is ever sold out they always have a couple extra seats under the ring
  11. What's better than seeing a girl wrestle?... Seeing her box.
  12. I'm not saying that I am unfit... But I just tried mud wrestling and the mud won.
  13. What's a wrestling chef's signature move? A *soup*-plex.
  14. Did you watch that movie about wrestling? I heard it was very Cenamatic.
  15. If Apple Saudi Arabia made a Wrestling Game, it would be called... iSlam.

Wrestling Match Jokes

Here is a list of funny wrestling match jokes and even better wrestling match puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Have you ever seen a wrestling match? Of course you haven't, matches can't wrestle if they come in boxes
  • My friend and I got in an argument, so we settled it with an arm wrestling match. I guess you could call it an armed conflict.
  • Did you hear about the guy who lost the wrestling match? Turns out he's a sore loser.
  • Why did the straw win in the wrestling match? Because he was so 'straw'ng
  • My wife compared our s**... to a wrestling match She said it was no holes barred
  • Did you hear that the saucepan beat the p**... in a wrestling match? It was a real boil over.

Arm Wrestling Jokes

Here is a list of funny arm wrestling jokes and even better arm wrestling puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Chuck Norris and Superman arm wrestled... Loser had to wear his underwear over his pants till the rest of his life.
  • Why did Neil Armstrong get to set foot on the moon before Buzz Aldrin? They wrestled over it. Neil had the stronger arm.
  • Two books arm wrestle. One ruptures is appendix, the other helps him rebind it.
  • There was no Big Bang.
    Chuck Norris arm wrestled himself and the energy produced created the universe.
  • There was a competition of arm wrestling between Chuck Norris and Superman.
    And guess what, the loser had to wear his u**... over his pants!
Wrestling joke

Sumo Wrestling Jokes

Here is a list of funny sumo wrestling jokes and even better sumo wrestling puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I heard your mom won a gold medal! I didn't even know they had sumo wrestling at the Olympics!
  • Yo mamma is so fat that when she showed up to watch a sumo wrestling tournament, they gave her the trophy.
  • Did you hear the Japanese sumo wrestling team lost to a group of prison inmates? I guess the cons outweighed the pros.
  • What is Sunday & Monday's favorite sport? SuMo Wrestling
  • I asked one of my sumo-wrestling friends whether he wanted some sushi for dinner He just replied "No thanks, I'm not a big Japanese guy"
  • This fat guy came up to me and said "do you want to fight!" I said no in not into sumo wrestling.

Wrestling Kid Jokes

Here is a list of funny wrestling kid jokes and even better wrestling kid puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • When I was a kid, my parents told me the noise from their bedroom at night was them wrestling. I didn't believe them so I snuck in one night... ...and got taken out by an RKO out of nowhere.
  • If video games make kids violent Why do priests always win their wrestling fights with them?
  • Who do blind kids boo at wrestling events? John Cena.
  • I came from an abusive family When I was a kid, my parents always wrestled with each other n**....
Wrestling joke, I came from an abusive family

Cheerful Fun Wrestling Jokes for Lovely Laughter

What funny jokes about wrestling you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean boxing match jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make wrestling pranks.

I walked in the pub last night to see 2 big blokes in there 20s arm wrestling with a huge crowd cheering around them.

I walked over and said to them, "I could beat either of you two in arm wrestle, hands down."
"Dont make me laugh," one of them said. "You're about 60 years old."
"I may be," I replied. "But I'm also a v**...."

Norwegians like to joke about the inferior intellect of our Swedish neighbors. This is my favorite joke:

A Norwegian is sitting at the bar and enjoying a nice drink. He turns to the large muscle man sitting by his side and asks: "Do you wan't to hear a joke about the swedes?"
The man replies: "Well, buddy, before you tell that joke I'd like you to know this: I am the current Swedish heavy weight boxing champion. The guy next to me won the Swedish wrestling championship five times and the guy sitting next to him represented Sweden in the Olympic games as a weight lifter. Are you absolutely sure you wan't to tell that joke?"
The Norwegian thinks for a few seconds and replies: "Meh, Not if I have to explain the joke THREE times."

Why is wrestling s**...??

It's a bunch of guy's without pants fighting for a belt....

I once was wrestling a guy and had him in a lock but couldn't make him tap out.

Sorry for the bad submission.

Yesterday I took l**... and I wrestled with a grass snake for three hours.

On a side note, our garden hose is completely wrecked.

I met an amputee in a bar

Everyone in the joint called him 'E'. He had been drinking there for a few years every single one of the locals knew him. Apparently he used to be the strongest guy in the town
"Ya know, I can still arm wrestle with the best of them" E said.
To which I replied
"you and what arm, E?"

Play wrestling that turns into s**...,

is the reason i hate wrestling with my dad

Arguing with strangers online is like wrestling sharks

Even if you win, it was a really s**... thing to do.

Wrestling is s**...

Men without pants fighting over a belt.

Ever had to force your dog into taking their medication?

It's the worst, right? You try to cover it with peanut butter, even then they know you're up to something. So it gets kinda physical, have to get in there with both hands and hold them open and push it in with your finger, hoping they don't bite you. Turns into a wrestling match, sometimes. But as it turns out, the trick was we were just using the wrong peanut butter. Ever since we switched to creamy, those suppositories just pop right in.

A blind man walks into a bar...

A blind man walks into a bar, without know its a lesbian bar, and says to the bartender:
"I have the world's best blonde joke. You wanna hear it?"
The bartender says "Hey, just so you know, I'm the world champion in wrestling. The girl next to you is the world champion in taekwondo and that girl over there is the world champion in kickboxing, and we're all blonde. Are you sure you still want to tell that joke?"
The guy replies "Haha, no thanks. I don't really feel like explaining the joke three times over."

An East Indian fellow has moved in next door. He has travelled the world, has swam with sharks, has wrestled bears and climbed the highest mountain. It came as no surprise to learn his name was...

Bindair Dundat

A man lines up for food in Soviet Russia...

After two hours of waiting he gets his turn and offers his bowl.
Out of soup. says the officer in charge and waves him aside.
The man refuses to leave. He tosses the bowl on the table and curses the regime for failing his starving family.
The officer motions to the guards and they wrestle the ranting man away. As they shove him outside, one says to the man:
Back then we could've shot you in the snow, comrade.
The man goes back home to his wife. She sees him looking glum as he walks in and asks:
Ran out of soup again?
Even worse, he replied. They ran out of bullets.

Waitress walks over to the table

Waitress - You guys all finished?
Me - Yes
Waitress - You wanna box for your leftovers?
Me - No, but I'll wrestle you for them.

My Dad actually said this is a Denver area Pizza Hut.

A group of maybe 6\-8 of us were finishing up our meal when a rather large woman \(our waitress\) came over and asked my dad if "we wanna box for our left over pizza?" Without skipping a beat, my dad looks her right in the eye and says "no, but I'll wrestle ya for it!". The look on her face was priceless!

Since the success of The Rock, fans suggest more wrestlers should participate in acting.

They are. It's called wrestling.

The first night in prison and not sleeping next to my wife, I wrestled uncontrollably with a large and throbbing e**....

I just wish it had been mine.

My friend made fun of me for being a wrestling fan. He said, "You know that stuff is fake right?"

I said, "So, are your wife's b**..., but I still enjoy them for three hours every Monday night."

Wrestling is so s**...;

men with no pants, fighting for a belt.

I auditioned for the WWE a few years ago

I auditioned for the WWE a few years ago under the wrestling name 'Paperman'.
I failed to get in though.
At the time Dwayne Johnson was the champion, and the bosses didn't want me beating him.

What's a comedians favorite wrestling move??¿?

The Knee s**...

A regular family dinner

Son: Mama, I saw Papa in the maids bedroom today
Pa: H-Hey now you just be quiet and eat your dinner son
Ma: Go on son...
Son: Papa took off his clothes and the maid did the same!!!
Pa: Now listen here you lying little sh--
Ma: Finish the story Son!
Son: Then Papa got on top of the maid, and wrestled each other the same way you and Uncle Jeff did!!!
Ma: Now listen here you lying little sh--

A dying kid makes a wish to meet Dwayne Johnson

Dwayne sits at the side of the hospital bed and asks the kid if he was a fan of wrestling.
The kid says yeah, and that he knows his only weakness.
Dwayne looks puzzled, and asks what it is.
"Come closer" says the kid.
Dwayne leans in, and the kid shows him his open palm. Dwayne looks confused, and the next second the kid slaps him full power across the face.
"Paper beats rock."

I saw a woman at the gas station pumping gas and trying to light a cigarette

I went inside to pay and saw two policemen in the store. I said "Did you guys see that woman out there?" They looked outside and suddenly darted out the door. I turn and see she caught her arm on fire
The policemen threw a blanket around her and wrestled her to the ground and put out the fire. Then they gave her a ticket!
After they came inside I asked why they gave her a ticket. Turns out that firearm wasn't registered

A drunk man walks into a bar

After a really good party a man walks into a bar and orders a drink. Already drunk and delirious, the man turns to the person sitting next to him and says, "You wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The person replies, "I am 240 pounds, world kickboxing champion and a natural blonde. My friend is 190 pounds, world judo champion and is a natural blonde. And my other friend is 200 pounds, world arm wrestling champion and is also a natural blonde. Do you still want to tell me that blonde joke?"
The man thinks for a while and replies, "Not if I have to explain it three times."

Wrestling is s**......

Some guys with no pants fight for a belt.

Costco cashier - "You want a box for your groceries?"

Me - "No, but I'll wrestle you for them"

My dog decided to join the Mexican Wrestling circuit.

I guess it was his dream to become a Puchador.

Yesterday I took l**... and I wrestled with a grass snake for three hours.

On an unrelated note, my mum needs a new garden hose.

A man goes to Spain on vacation

While he's there he goes to a restaurant and the waiter gives him an additional side dish along with his meal
The man loves the side dish and when he asks the waiter what it is, he says "A bull died in a bull wrestling show and these were its t**..."
The next day the man asks for the same side dish but notices that its tiny compared to the ones yesterday
He asks the waiter why they're so small and the waiter says "Sometimes the bull wins"

What is the Roman Empire?

In the heart of the bustling Roman Empire, there was a philosopher known for his wisdom, humor, and the ability to make light of the most complex issues. One day, a curious citizen confronted him, asking "What exactly is the Roman Empire?"
The philosopher paused for a moment before saying, "Imagine a man trying to wrestle a lion. The man is strong and well-prepared, but he is, after all, merely a man. The lion is wild, ferocious, and barely within his control. Yet, the man does not back down; he dives headfirst into the tangle, figuring out how to tackle it as he goes along. That, my friend, is the Roman Empire."
The citizen blinked and asked, "So, we're the man in this scenario, right? Struggling against the fierce lion that is the vast world?"
"No, not exactly," chuckled the philosopher. "You see, the man is the Roman Empire, always seeking to overcome, control, and rule, even when the odds seem overwhelming. The lion, rather, represents the infinite sea of cultures, lands, and people that the Empire constantly tangles with."
"But what if the lion eventually wins?" queried the citizen, now intrigued.
"Well," the philosopher answered with a mischievous glint in his eye, "Then the joke's on us, isn't it?"
The gathered crowd erupted into laughter, appreciating the wit and wisdom tied into the punchline. After all, understanding the Roman Empire didn't just involve historical facts and figures; sometimes, it was just about appreciating the irony!

Wrestling joke, What is the Roman Empire?

jokes about wrestling