Worldwide Jokes
59 worldwide jokes and hilarious worldwide puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about worldwide that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Worldwide Short Jokes
Short worldwide jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The worldwide humour may include short world wide jokes also.
- A recent worldwide survey showed that out of 2,146,703,436 people, 94% were too lazy to actually read that number.
- Wonder Woman earned $300 million worldwide in first week. "Wonder Man" earned $400 million for doing the same job.
- After a flood of forged financial documents from a small eastern european country, an urgent warning was issued by banks worldwide CHECK CZECH CHEQUES
- Olympic Sailing results are in! denmark have taken gold
Finland have taken silver
Somalia have taken a middle aged couple who were on a worldwide cruise - Deer nuts are always the same price worldwide.... Always under a buck! lol
My 11 year old son told me this joke today and thought I'd share with everyone. - A recent worldwide survey showed... A recent worldwide survey showed that out of 7,146,703,436 people, 94% were too lazy to actually read that number.
- Analysts are now predicting an exact worldwide repeat of the COVID-19 spread 18 months from now and there is nothing we can do to prevent it It will be 2022.
- There must be flat-earthers at Microsoft. Or why would one call a browser for the worldwide web Edge?
- With all the negativity world-wide lately, it's nice to see Charlie Sheen has announced something positive
- My friend runs a very successful business making prosthetic limbs and exporting them worldwide. He is an International Arms dealer.
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Worldwide One Liners
Which worldwide one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with worldwide? I can suggest the ones about world wide web and global.
- TIL The U.S is #18 in mathematics worldwide. At least we're in the top 10.
- Yo momma so fat she doesn't need the web.
She's world-wide. - How did God respond to worldwide declining birth rates? Sending thots and players.
- Yo mama so fat. She don't need the internet, she already worldwide.
- Why do feminists hate the Worldwide Postal System? Because it is a mail focused system
- Your mom is so fat That she doesn't need the internet because she's already worldwide
- Bee population worldwide is exploding. What a time to be a hive.
- What would you call a worldwide gathering of male athletes who have ED? The Olympdicks.
- Which artist would be most suitable to be Santa Claus? Mr Worldwide.
- Pitbulls momma is so fat. They call her Mrs. Worldwide
- We Call her Ms. Worldwide She's got a figure like the globe
- A Worldwide Survey Was Conducted by the UN...
- It's better to be a worldwide alcoholic, than an Alcoholic Anonymous.
- Yo mamma is so fat she doesn't need the intenet to be worldwide.
- What is the most common cause of blindness worldwide? Love.
Uproarious Worldwide Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about worldwide you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean overseas jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make worldwide pranks.
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With the decline of newspapers worldwide, staff in-house have been referring to the obituaries
as the Subscriber Countdown
UN Food Survey Fails...
UN Phone Survey
Last month, a world-wide telephone survey was conducted by the UN.
The only question asked was:
"Would you please give your honest opinion about possible solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"
The survey was a complete failure because:
In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.
In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.
In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.
In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.
In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.
In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.
In the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.
And in Australia , New Zealand and Britain everyone hung up as soon as they heard the Indian accent.
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The United Nations world-wide survey
The United Nations sent out a survey to all the nations in the different continents of the world.
The survey went like this:
"We want your honest opinion on how to find a solution to the food shortage in the rest of the world"
The survey of course, turned out to be a total and abject failure:
The People in western Europe didn't know what the word 'shortage' meant. The people in eastern Europe had no idea what the expression 'honest' was supposed to mean. In china no one knew what 'opinion' was. In Africa they didn't know what 'food' was. In the middle east no one could figure out what 'solution' was; and in america they had no idea what 'the rest of the world' meant.
The #1 cause of death worldwide is s**... transmitted and carries a 100% fatality rate.
Its called conception
How to stop p**... worldwide?
Kill all the children.
A worldwide chickpea shortage has caused Humus makers to add more lemon to the recipe
Retailers are expecting sales to fall and are prepared for a sharp dip.
Data gathered from over 10,000 prisoners worldwide suggests that the most common side effect is...
...cell-ulite.
Honestly, im glad Trump became president, crime dropped his first day on the job.
Real estate fraud worldwide dropped within 24 hours
The UN decided to do a worldwide survey...
The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge flop. In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant. In Eastern Europe, they didn't know what "honest" meant. In Western Europe, they didn't know what "shortage" meant. In China, they didn't know what "opinion" meant. In the Middle East, they didn't know what "solution" meant. In South America, they didn't know what "please" meant. And in the USA, they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.
What's the difference between climate change and obesity?
One's a worldwide problem.
The other's a wideworld problem.
What's the difference between Switzerland 70 years ago and Switzerland now?
They are completely avoiding events in Europe that could or could not lead to chaos worldwide.
Worldwide, millions die from alcohol a**... each year....
It truly is a horrible ginocide.
Do you ever wonder what happens to your luggage once you checked it in?
So does British Airways.
160 Destinations, Over 90 Countries Worldwide.
Could be in any one of them.
Why is the worldwide online payment supergiant called Paypal?
Because you still gotta pay, pal.
The government swore to shut down Fortnite due to claims of the video game aggravating children and teens worldwide.
Two weeks later, Fortnight was finished.
It's a sport that is played worldwide. It has four letters starting with a 'T'. What is it?
GOLF!
I accidentally started a worldwide t**... organization.
I just didn't expect it to blow up so much
The following ran on Internet Explorer's Facebook pad yesterday:
We have finally made a vaccine! Thanks to the hundreds of brilliant scientists worldwide working tirelessly on a vaccine, we have finally found a vaccine.
It is reported that mass production of the newly discovered smallpox vaccine will begin from next week.
It was revealing when Americans bought toilet paper at the start of the COVID-19 Crisis
It goes to show in the midst of a worldwide pandemic, The Average American only cares about his own a**....
A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN.
The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge failure. In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant. In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant. In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant. In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant. In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant. In South America they didn't know what "please" meant. And in the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.
A couple of good covid jokes I've heard
1. I dont know anything about Coronavirus other than if you have it; you get an undeniable urge to go the airport.
2. By the point most of the world has been exposed to covid 19, but the people in Wuhan got it right of the bat.
3. You know why I think coronavirus wont last for more than a year.
WHY?
coz it's made in China.
4. I dont think anyone saw a worldwide pandemic happening this year. I guess most people don't have 2020 vision.
A worldwide survey has been carried out with the following question:
*"PLEASE, GIVE US YOUR OPINION ON THE LACK OF FOOD IN THE REST OF THE World"* No result was achieved, since the following problems were facedduring the survey's implementation:
1. In Western Europe no one knew what is "lack"
2. In Africa no one knew what is "food"
3. In Eastern Europe no one knew what is "opinion"
4. In South America no one knew what is "please"
5. In the USA no one knew what is "rest of the world"
A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN.
The only question asked was:
'Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world? The survey was a failure.
In Africa they didn't know what 'food' meant;
in India they didn't know what 'honest' meant;
in Europe they didn't know what 'shortage' meant;
in China they didn't know what 'opinion' meant;
in the Middle East they didn't know what 'solution' meant;
in South America they didn't know what 'please' meant;
in the USA they didn't know what 'the rest of the world' meant.
