The Best 14 Working Carpenter Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Working Carpenter jokes. There are some working carpenter sweatshop jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these working carpenter working from home puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Working Carpenter Jokes and Puns

A good zinger that my friend carpenter used on a doctor

So this Dr hired my friend (who's a carpenter) to do some work around the house, the doc was curiously looking over my friends shoulder as he was putting a piece of molding to cover his uneven cut. The doc said with a cavalier attitude "that's an easy way to hide your mistakes!" and without thinking, my friend replied "yeah, to hide my mistakes I don't need 6 feet of soil!"

My friend decided to take up wood working and he heard this joke at his new work place

A joiner makes sure that what he makes fits with the rest down to the tenth of a millimeter.

A carpenter makes sure it fits down to a millimeter.

A mason makes sure it fits down to the centimeter.

If the painter makes it to the right address, it's a good thing.

How do lesbian carpenters work?

No studs. All tongue in groove.

Working Carpenter joke, How do lesbian carpenters work?

New Old House

While carpenters were busy working outside the old house I just bought, I busied myself with indoor cleaning. I had just finished washing the floor when one of the workers came in and asked to use the washroom. I looked at his muddy boots and said "Just wait a second, Ill grab some newspapers"

"That's alright lady," he responded, "I'm already trained."

My wife has been keeping secrets from me.

I just built a fence and put down some paving. Turns out not only is she a master carpenter she's also an expert brick layer. If only I had known earlier I could have sought her advice before I did the work. It would have saved me from making all the obvious mistakes she pointed out after the work was done.


What's a gay carpenter's favorite hobby?

I don't know. It's a toss up between woodworking and working wood.

Why was Mary a virgin?

Because Joseph the Carpenter worked his own wood.

Working Carpenter joke, Why was Mary a virgin?

My friend was working on gluing two pieces of wood together and wondered to me how carpenters manage it so easily.

So I offered, "some add vise." ^^^Sorry ^^^for ^^^the ^^^pun, ^^^it's ^^^one ^^^of ^^^my ^^^vices

Two Carpenters

Two carpenters were working on a house. One older one and one newer to the job. They were both working on one side of the house. After a few hours of working the older guy noticed the young guy looking at every nail, then dropping about half. The older one exclaimed about this and asked. Why are you wasting those perfectly good nails? the second guy answered
They're facing the wrong direction!
You idiot! The older man exclaimed. They're for the other side of the house!

A carpenter sent me her bill for installing a skylight in my windowless bathroom.

I only paid her half the bill. She called and asked why. I said, It doesn't work at night.

I'm a carpenter by trade and told my wife how much I hate doing repetitious work. She said well you would hate having a desk job.

I think she's right, I wouldn't like building desks all day either.

You can explore working carpenter workman reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean working carpenter handyman dad jokes. There are also working carpenter puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A carpenter tries his hand at building a car

It was a work of wood that wooden work.

Jesus vs other carpenters

Usually those who've had construction work done on their house get this immediately:

Q: How is Jesus different from other carpenters?

A: Jesus may actually return some day.

Wood working can be really dangerous

Look at the most famous carpenter ever. Dead, nailed to a cross...

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the working carpenter working out jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working working carpenter karen carpenter piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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