JokoJokes

Wood Shed Jokes

10 wood shed jokes and hilarious wood shed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about wood shed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Share These Wood Shed Jokes With Friends




Wood Shed Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.

What is a good wood shed joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

FBI Investigation.

The phone rings at the FBI headquarters.
"Hello? I'm calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding m**... inside his firewood!"
"Thank you very much for the call, Sir."
The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes the they bust open every piece of wood, but finds no m**.... They swear at the neighbors and leave. The phone rings at the neighbors house.
"Hey Clifford, did the FBI come?"
"Yep"
"Did they chop the wood?"
"Yep"
"Great, now it's your turn to call. i need my garden plowed."

Who said r**... aren't real smart?

"Hello, is this here the Sheriff's Office?"
"Yes. What can I do for you?"
"I'm calling to report my neighbor, Virgil Smith. He's drillin' holes in his farwood and hiding m**... inside!"
"Thank you very much for the call, sir."
The next day, the Sheriff & his deputies descend on Virgil's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept.
Using axes, they split every piece of wood, but find no m**.... They sneer at Virgil and leave.
The phone rings at Virgil's house. "Hey, Virgil! This here is Floyd. Did the Sheriff come?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they split yer farwood?"
"Yep!"
"Happy Birthday, buddy!"

Ivan and Piotr are drinking in a shack out in the woods...

They've been drinking for three days straight and have finally run completely out of booze.
Piotr turns to Ivan and says, "Vanya, go look in the shed out back, see if there's anything to drink there."
Ivan stumbles back with a bottle of methanol in his hand. "Well, we could drink this, but we'd go blind."
Piotr looks around the shack, stares out the window a moment, and says, "I think I've seen enough."

w**... in wood

'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?'
'Yes What can I do for you?'
'I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith....He's
hidin' m**... inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs , but he's hidin' it there.'
'Thank you very much for the call, sir.'
The next day, the Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no m**....
They sneer at Virgil and leave.
Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house.
'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd... did the Sheriff come?'
'Yeah!'
'Did they chop your firewood?'

'Yep!'
'Happy Birthday, buddy!'

The phone rings at FBI headquarters.

"Hello?"
"Hello, is this FBI?"
"Yes. What do you want?"
"I'm calling to report my neighbour Tom. He is hiding m**... in his firewood."
"This will be noted."
Next day, the FBI comes over to Tom's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept, break every piece of wood, find no m**..., swear at Tom and leave.
The phone rings at Tom's house.
"Hey, Tom! Did the FBI come?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they chop your firewood?"
"Yeah they did."
"Okay, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."

r**... git-n-er done!

"Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?"
"Yes. What can I do you for?"
"I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith... He's hidin' m**... inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs, be he's hidin' it there."
"Thank you very much for the call, sir."
The next day the Sheriff and his deputies descend on Virgil's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no m**.... They sneer at Virgil and leave. Shortly, after the phone rings at Virgil's house.
"Hey, Virgil, this here is Flloyd... Did the Sheriff come?
"Yeah!"
"Did they chop your firewood for the winter?"
"Yep!"
"Happy Birthday, buddy!"

The worst stash spot

At the back woods b**...-duck county police station the phone rings...
'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?'
'Yes. What can I do for you?'
'Ah'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Mr. Virgil Smith....ya see sir, he's hidin' m**... inside all his firewood pieces! Don't quite know how he gets it inside dem logs, but he's a-hidin' it there.'
'Thank you very much for the call, sir.'
The next day, the Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They searched the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no sign of any m**.... They sneer at Virgil and leave.
Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house.
'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd....Did the Sheriff come?'
'Yup sure did!'
'Did they chop all-a ya'all firewood?'
'Yup!'
'Happy Birthday, buddy!'

Oh, Floyd!

Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?''
''Yes, what can I do for you?''
''I'm calling to report my neighbor Virgil Smith. He's hiding m**... inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs, but he's hidin' it there.''
''Thank you very much for the call, sir.''
The next day, the Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood... only to find no m**.... They sneer at Virgil and leave. Shortly the phone rings at Virgil's house.
''Hey, Virgil, This here's Floyd... Did the Sheriff come by?''
''Yeah!''
'' Did they chop your firewood for the winter?'' ''Yep!''
Merry Christmas, buddy!''

m**...-Filled Firewood

At the back woods b**...-duck county police station the phone rings...
'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?'
'Yes. What can I do for you?'
'Ah'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Mr. Virgil Smith....ya see sir, he's hidin' m**... inside all his firewood pieces! Don't quite know how he gets it inside dem logs, but he's a-hidin' it there.'
'Thank you very much for the call, sir.'
The next day, the Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They searched the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no sign of any m**.... They sneer at Virgil and leave.
Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house.
'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd....Did the Sheriff come?'
'Yup sure did!'
'Did they chop all-a ya'all firewood?'
'Yup!'
'Happy Birthday, buddy!'
by mid_nite_poet

The phone rings at Federal Drug Enforcement Agency headquarters.


"Hello?"
"Hello, is this the Federal Drug Enforcement Agency?"
"Yes. What can we do for you?"
"I’m calling to report my neighbor Tom. He is hiding c**... in his firewood."
"Thank you, this will be noted."
Next day, the Drug Enforcement agents come over to Tom’s house.
They search the shed where the firewood is kept, break every piece of wood, find no c**..., swear at Tom and leave.
The phone rings at Tom’s house.
"Hey, Tom! Did the Federal Drug Enforcement guys come by?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they chop your firewood for you?"
"Yeah, they did."
"Okay, now it’s YOUR turn to call. I need my garden plowed."

Share These Wood Shed Jokes With Friends