Womens Jokes

Funniest Womens Short Jokes

Short womens jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The womens humour may include short bidet jokes also.

1. I like my women like I like my whiskey. 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
   Disclaimer: This is just a joke, i do not condone the practice of mixing whiskey with coke.
2. After my wife died I couldn't look at women for 20 years But when I got out of prison, it was totally worth it
3. A Roman soldier is bragging to his friend: 'You'll never guess with how many women I've slept!' 'Mmm?'
   'Not that many!'
4. My girlfriend told me women are better at multitasking than men. So I told her to sit down and shut up. Guess what... She couldn't do either!
5. How many trans women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, and you don't even need the lightbulb. Just tell her she's a lovely girl, and she'll brighten up the room instantly.
6. What's the difference between the Taliban and Texas? The Taliban requires women to wear mask
7. The women I meet in bars have the WORST pickup line... They're like, "Hey, what's your friends name?" Never works on me ladies.
8. Why do Jews get Circumcised? Because jewish women refuse to touch anything that isn't at least 10% off
9. What do you call the sexuality where you're attracted to men and women but neither are attracted to you? Bi-yourself.
10. Why are all Jewish men circumcised? Because Jewish women won't touch anything that's not 10% off

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Womens One Liners

Which womens one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with womens? I can suggest the ones about equality and chaps.

1. I like my women like I like my coffee I've never had coffee but it smells really nice
2. I like my women like I like my slaves Educated and free.
3. I like my women like I like my password Short and insecure
4. A lot of women actually turn into good drivers So if you're a good driver watch out.
5. If men call short women petite. What do women call short men? Friends.
6. Why do trans women go by she/her? Because if they went by her/she they'd be chocolate
7. Why are women and children evacuated first? So we can think about a solution in silence.
8. International women's day should not be used as an excuse for sexist jokes Period.
9. I like my women how I like my computer. On my lap.
   Turned on.
   Virus free.
10. What does every women in the world want? Nothing, they're fine.
11. Today I was asked to go out, by 20 girls... I was in the women's bathroom.
12. I like my women like I like my snow Heavy & wet
13. I like my women how I like my COVID 19, breathtaking, and easy to spread
14. Women have eggs and milk in them... And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
15. Why can't two women play monopoly together? There's only one iron.

Womens Day Jokes

Here is a list of funny womens day jokes and even better womens day puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I like my women like I like my mathematical constants. Round and irrational.
  Happy Pi Day everyone!
• My girlfriend said to me the other day, "Why did God give women periods with cramp pains, and men nothing?" I laughed and replied, "Don't be silly, he gave us women."
• You know why women's eyes are so noticeable these days? It's the mask era.
• Why do women talk less in february? Cause there's only 28 days
• My son was frustrated because apparently he just doesn't understand girls. I assured him saying that that'll change one day. Yes, when you get older, you won't understand women.
• I asked Siri "What do women want?" My phone has not shut up for the past three days.
• Today is International Women's Day. It was actually supposed to be held yesterday but they took too long to get ready.
• International womens day is not an excuse for low effort sexist jokes. Period.
• Why do women's prisons give out tampons on release day? Because all sentences should end with a period.
• Today is International Women's Day. It was supposed to be yesterday, but they took longer than expected to get dressed.

Womens Right Jokes

Here is a list of funny womens right jokes and even better womens right puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I got fired from my job at the library... Apparently the book on women's rights doesn't belong in the fiction section.
• What do you call a girl that raps about women rights? Feminem.
• Women say all men are dogs but fail to realize that dogs are the most loyal creatures in the world if you treat them right.
• Why did the feminist cross the road? It doesn't matter. Women have the right to cross roads without having their motives questioned.
• Ray Rice doesn't believe in giving women rights. However, he has no problem giving them a couple lefts
• I'm have mixed feelings about abortion. On one hand, I love killing babies, on the other I hate giving women rights.
• I got kicked out of the library today I got kicked out of the library for putting the women's rights book in the fiction section
• When God created women... He told them: "Women from all the corners of the world should have equal rights to men."
  Ironically he made the Earth round.
• What does the r in women stand for? Rights
• Lads if you are bored! Phone up women's rights groups... And ask to speak to the man in charge.

International Womens Day Jokes

Here is a list of funny international womens day jokes and even better international womens day puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Happy International Women's Day! Or as I like to call it, Taco Tuesday
• It's International Women's Day today. I guess I should make some sort of sexist joke. I'll have to simplify it for the women.
• In honor of international women's day.... Why are women like a hurricane?
  ​
  at first they are wet and wild, and when they leave they take your house.
• Originally, International Women's Day was celebrated on the 8 of January. However, because they had to get ready, it has since been postponed to 8 March.
• It appears international women's day was a HUGE success. Women from all over the US demonstrated their femininity by not making up their minds about whether they wanted to celebrate it or not.
• So today is International Women's Day It was supposed to be yesterday but they took too long to get ready.
  ^^stole ^^this ^^from ^^twitter, ^^sorry
• Today is "International Women's Day", but don't worry guys International Men's Day is coming April 1st.
• I'm celebrating international women's day by not having my wife make me a sandwich today. I'm going to Subway and having Rachel make it instead.
• International Women's Day is over :( Back to being International Men's day for the next 364 :)
• International women's day? Women don't need a day... They just need 5 minutes.

Womens Golf Jokes

Here is a list of funny womens golf jokes and even better womens golf puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I like my women like I like my golf scores In the mid 70's with a slight handicap
• I like my women like I like my golf game Around 80 and handicapped.
• Women playing golf goes to doctor She tells the doctor while playing golf a bee stung her between the first hole and the second hole, the doctor replies your stance is to wide
• I like my women like I like my golf game, mid-80s with a slight handicap.
• I like my women how I like my golf scores... Low 80's with a slight handicapp
• Why do women only use putters while playing golf? Because women can't drive.
• You hear they are letting women into the Augusta national golf club? They recieve green aprons instead of green jackets.
• Been watching women's golf on the TV this morning... They don't appear to be very good at driving but they're great with an iron.
• Did you see the story about the women that was blinded at the Ryder Cup? She went to see the golf with her own eyes....and then got a hole-in-one
• Golf Vs Women Why don't women play golf?
  Because they s**... at driving.

Uproarious Womens Jokes to Share with Friends

What funny jokes about womens you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean poll jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make womens pranks.