Women Rights Jokes
101 women rights jokes and hilarious women rights puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about women rights that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Women Rights Short Jokes
Short women rights jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The women rights humour may include short womans rights jokes also.
- I got fired from my job at the library... Apparently the book on women's rights doesn't belong in the fiction section.
- Ray rice doesn't believe in giving women rights. However, he has no problem giving them a couple lefts
- I got kicked out of the library today I got kicked out of the library for putting the women's rights book in the fiction section
- When God created women... He told them: "Women from all the corners of the world should have equal rights to men."
Ironically he made the Earth round. - Lads if you are bored! Phone up women's rights groups... And ask to speak to the man in charge.
- Survey gone wrong.. or right?? On a survey for 'which conditioner you use?' 99% of the womens said 'aaahhhhhh.....get out of my shower!!!!'
- You wanna know why I got kicked out of the library? I moved all of the women's rights books to the fiction section.
- A women at a women's right protest got mad at me because I told her that women sometimes can't do the jobs that men can do She then got her boyfriend to beat me up
- I don't understand women... I thought opening the door was the right thing to do, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane...
- My dads a women's rights activist. Your dad? Not your mum?
No, dad wouldn't allow that.
*Courtesy of u/hihellow*
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Women Rights One Liners
Which women rights one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with women rights? I can suggest the ones about human rights and gender equality.
- What do you call a girl that raps about women rights? Feminem.
- What does the r in women stand for? Rights
- I like my women how I like my stock images... Rights free
- Why did the cow cross the road? To get to her Women's Rights meeting
- Many Saudi women are fans of the Second Amendment. They would like a right to bare arms.
- Q: Why do some women look at blank paper?
A: They like to read their rights. - Gonna start rapping about women's rights... Call me Feminem.
- My dad told me "women are always right". He then told me that he was wrong; he was right.
- You know what I hate about abortion clinics? Women get the right to make a choice.
- Women's rights in Saudi Arabia Are just a stone's throw away.
- When women talk about equal rights.
- Want to hear something funny? Women's rights
- Women's Rights here come the feminists
- Women's Rights... ...
- Why do women always ask questions that have no right answers?
Cheerful Women Rights Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What funny jokes about women rights you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean womens health jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make women rights pranks.
We are all God's children right? And Jesus is God's only son, right? So aren't we all women?
A mother was teaching her three year old daughter The Lord’s Prayer.
For several evenings at bedtime, she repeated it after her mother.
One night she said she was ready to solo.
The mother listened with pride, as she carefully said each word right up to the end…
"And lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."
A government employee sat in his office, and out of boredom, decided to see what was inside his old filing cabinet.
He poked through the contents and came across an old brass lamp.
"This will look good on my mantel," he said, and took it home with him.
While polishing the lamp, a genie appeared and, as usual, granted him three wishes.
"I would like an ice-cold Coke right now."
He gets his Coke and drinks it.
Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish.
"I wish to be on an island with beautiful women, who find me irresistible."
Suddenly, he's on an island with gorgeous women eyeing him lustfully.
He tells the genie his third and last wish.
"I wish I'd never have to work again."
Instantly, he was back in his government office.
A woman is very overweight and goes to see a weight therapist.
The woman asks for some good advices.
The therapist answers like this: "Well you just need to turn your head to the right and to the left when someone asks you if you want to eat at McDonalds."
Husband: "Right now, for this Women's Day, I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world!"
Wife: "Oh dear, I will miss you!"
I always wanted to marry Mrs. Right, but I didn't know her first name was "Always".
Q: Why do manly ghosts have so much trouble dating?
A: Women can see right through them!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Liberals are acting like Trump is going to kill all the g**..., make slavery legal again, and take away women's rights....
Like he's a Muslim or something.
I don't get why pro athletes feel the need to hit women...
...just reply to the next one in your DMs if she isn't acting right.
Why is Saudi Arabia so late to givng rights to women?
Because they have been living under Iraq.
Please settle an argument regarding this joke: why is it funny?
>What is the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
>30 pounds.
This joke has been the source of debate among my peers. I know I'm right, but I need evidence/validation. Why is this joke funny? What is the punch line implying?
----
A women gets pulled over.
Attempting to get out of a ticket, she tries, as the cop is walking to her car, to try flirting.
"Hi," she says seductively.
"Hi," he replies.
"I thought you didn't give pretty ladies tickets?" She pouts.
"You're right, we don't. Here's your ticket, have a nice day."
You wanna hear a joke?
Women's rights (Said flatly)
sexist, but even my close girlfriend's love it
A women goes to a dentist
She sits down and spreads her legs. "Im not sure im the right person for this" the dentist says. The women replies " I know, but you put my husbands dentures in and now your gonna take them out".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Russian drunk in a streetcar
Another Russian joke. A drunk boards a streetcar, and says out loud:
"All the women to the left of me are idiots, and all the women to the right are w**...."
A woman to the right stands up and says, "I've been married for 15 years, and I've always been faithful to my husband, so there."
"Then move to the left."
A women goes to the doctors office...
The doctor comes in and asks whats wrong.
Women: "Well have been having really loud farts lately, and I don't know what to do, and it is quite embarrassing."
Doctor: "Well does it smell?"
Women: "No, Just really loud."
All of a sudden, she cuts one right in front of the the doctor.
Doctor: "Ah, I see. I will schedule you for surgery right away."
Women: "For my stomach?"
Doctor: "No for your nose."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A little Johnny...
One day in math class little Johnny's teacher asked him to look out the window, where three birds were sitting on a fence. She then asks "Johnny, if I shoot one of those birds how many are left?" Johnny replies "None, they would all have flown away when they heard the gun shot." The teacher smiles and says "The correct answer was two, but I like the way you think."
Johnny looks at the teacher and says "I have a question for you." "There are three women in an ice cream shop and they all have an ice cream cone, one is l**... it, one is biting it, and one is s**... it, which one is married?" The teach thinks about it a bit and says "The one s**... it." Johnny looks at her and say "The right answer was the one wearing the wedding ring, but I like the way you think."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A farmer has a new handsome assistant
A farmer has a new handsome assistant. One morning they want to go out into the fields to work. At the garden gate the farmer sees that the roads are muddy and realizes that he forgot his rubber boots (Wellingtons for the Brits ;)
He tells his assistant to go get the boots from the house. The assistant returns and finds the farmers very pretty wife, along with the equally pretty daughter sitting in the kitchen. He tells them: "The farmer just said it would be alright if I had s**... with you right now!" The women look sceptical, so the assistant opens the window and shouts to the farmer: "Both?"
Farmer: "Of course both of them, what do you think?!"
Women Think Differently
Husband's Text Message by cell phone:
"Honey, got hit by car when I was out of office. Paula brought me to Hospital. They're doing tests and X-rays now. Blow to my head very strong, fortunately it didn't cause serious injury, but I have three broken ribs, a compound fracture in left leg, and they may have to amputate right foot.
Wife's Text Response by Cell Phone:
"Who's Paula?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The difference between men and women.
Women only have two knees. Men have three, left knee, right knee, and a w**....
The Way Women Think
Husband's Message (by text):
"Darling, I got hit by a car outside the office. Paula brought me to the hospital. They have been doing tests and taking X-rays. The blow to my head though very strong, should not have any serious or lasting effect but, I have three broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture of the left leg and they may have to amputate my right foot. Fingers crossed!"
Wife's Response:
"Who's Paula?"
My dad was a very active advocate for women's rights...
My mom wanted to be as well, but my dad wouldn't allow it.
Only possible with the mind of a 7th grader...
My brother comes home from school one day and tells me his friend was held after school.
I asked him what for.
He said he moved all the women's rights books in the library into the fiction department.
Now Its the Father Problem
Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.
One day a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?"
Fred replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them."
His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who's just like your mother."
A few months later they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?"
With a frown on his face, Fred answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much."
The friend said, "Then what's the problem?"
Fred replied, "My father doesn't like her."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man walks into a bar and sees h**......
A man walks into a bar and sees h**....
"Hey, is that h**...?" he asks the bartender.
"Yeah that's Adolf and his right hand man. Have a cold beer and go introduce yourself!"
The man gets a nice cold bottle from the bartender and makes his way over to h**....
"Hello Adolf."
"How are you?" Adolf asks.
"Good, what are you doing?"
h**...'s right hand man chimes in. "We are going over plans for World War III."
"Ah, what are your plans for it?" the bar visiting man asks.
"Well, we will kill 1 million Jews and 1 bicycle repair man," Adolf's right hand man answers.
"Why are you going to kill a bicycle repair man?" asks the man.
h**... becomes excited and turns to his right hand man.
"Ha! See? I told you nobody would care about the Jews."
--
The Holocaust is a terrible thing. This is a terrible joke. However, it has made people laugh, even Jewish people because it is very unexpected. I have no issue with Jewish men or women.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Had a fight with the wifey last night.
She exclaimed "Shut up, women are always right and men are always wrong." to which I replied "Yes, you are right".
What was the name of the landmark 1973 federal court decision that gave women everywhere the right to wear leather?
Roe vs. Suede
two ladies were sitting in a bar...
the one on the left was lovely, kind and beautiful
the one on the right was very attractive, smart, and attentive
both of the women were hitting on me all nite which one did i take home?
the one on the right because lefty loosy righy tighty
Not sure if this is the right place to post, but after the US election results from last night, I need help creating a new dating website. It will help desperate American men and women find love in Canada.
It'll be called ehHarmony
A girl in a car gets pulled over,
Girl: I thought you don't give tickets to pretty women?
Cop: that's right we don't. Now sign here.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Finding exactly what right women don't have in America is like transmuting iron to gold.
You can't.
Today my dad asked what I was talking to
"My imaginary friend"
"Oh what's their name?"
"Womens rights"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you destroy a feminist in a debate?
You ask "what rights do men have that women don't?"
What's a joke that was funny in early America, but is even more hilarious in the present day middle east?
"Women's rights"
*^ba-dum ^ching*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do women and floor tiles have in common?
Lay em right the first time and you can walk on them the rest of your life. (Sorry mom)
AXE products claim if you smell good, women will be all over you, but that can't be right
I've never had any problems with my nose and I'm still single.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Women are like multiple choice tests
They give you plenty of options but there's only one right answer
The BBC have a new cooking show, hosted by women who have been victims of domestic violence.
It's called "Can't Cook? Right Hook!"
Women gained the right to vote 100 years ago to the day...
yet they still can't cast a vote on what they want for dinner
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Gay marriage is sending single women right over the edge...
Now all the good men are married **AND** gay!
I like my women like...
I like my women like i like my whiskey... 7 years old and right from the cellar.
Oprah promises prosecution of all women in sleeveless dresses when she takes office
She is against the right to bare arms.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Women say all men are dogs
but fail to realize that dogs are the most loyal creatures in the world if you treat them right.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Government Employee sits in his office and out of boredom, decides to see what's in his old filing cabinet.
He pokes through the contents and comes across an old brass lamp. "This will look nice on my mantelpiece," he decides, and takes it home with him. While polishing the lamp, a genie appears and grants him three wishes. "I wish for an ice cold beer right now!" He gets his beer and drinks it. Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish. "I wish to be on an island where beautiful women reside." Suddenly he is on an island with gorgeous females eyeing him lustfully. He tells the genie his third and last wish: "I wish I'd never have to work ever again." p**...! He's back in his government office.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The reason women are responsible for more accidents at intersections....
must be because they don't have as much experience pulling out as men do.
(OC I think? Thought it up when a woman pulled out right in front of me today, and then had a s**... "what did I do wrong" look on her face when I honked at her for it.)
A cop pulls over 3 old ladies
A cop pulls over 3 old ladies doing 20 in a 65mph zone. The cop walks up to the window.
"How can I help you officer?"
"Did you realize you were doing 20 in a 65mph zone?"
"I thought we were doing the speed limit. It says so right there." The old woman pointed to a sign.
"Ma'am thats the sign saying you're on interstate 20." Just then the officer noticed the two women in back looked extremely frightened. "What's wrong with them?"
"Oh we must have just come off interstate 200."
Today I got thrown out of the library
It's because I put the "women's rights" book under fiction.
"My dad's quite the champion of women's rights and is a feminist."
"That's great. What about your mom?"
"Oh no, Dad would never allow that."
I got fired from my job as a librarian,
for putting a book on women's rights in the fiction section.
Yesterday i got kicked out of the library
Yesterday i got kicked out of the library
They said that the fiction section wasn't fitting for a book about women's rights
I went to a brewery tour and the tour guide asked what horrible thing happened in the early 1900s
Apparently women's suffrage wasn't the right answer.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Women are like clarinets.
They make a cool noise if you lick them the right way.
If women are fighting for equal rights...
Then why, as a man, do I get judged when shopping for bras?
My grandpa used to say that what women want is security, and I have to admit he was right.
That's what they yell for when I start talking to them.
My dyslexic support group held a slam poetry competition
Doug got first with a great piece about racial tensions in America.
Anna got second with a touching monologue about women's rights.
I got third by smashing an urn.
Two women are standing on a bridge...
Emily and Katy are standing on a bridge when Emily says, "Have you ever wanted to pee over the bridge like guys do?"
And Katy says, "You know what, I think I will."
So she lifts her leg over the edge of the bridge and says, "Check it out, I'm gonna pee right down into that canoe."
Emily looks at the water and says, "That's not a canoe, that's your reflection."
Two women are standing on a bridge
One woman says to the other You know.. I always wanted to pee outside the way men do
The other woman goes Go head nobody's around!
So she hikes her skirt up and squats over the water and says Come here I'm a gonna pee right there in that canoe!
She says That's not a canoe it's your reflection
My favorite food is hamburger, but that does not mean I do not enjoy steak once in a while
..That was not the right thing to say when my girlfriend asked why I'm staring at other women.
When two women are in a relationship together...
...how do they know which one is always right?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man walks in to a bar
And sees an ugly old humpback of a guy, who is constantly surrounded by women.
How to spot a millionaire, am I right? he winks and smiles at the bartender
No, Larry is a plumber, not a millionaire
Okay - so he must be extremely charming?
Larry is actually a man of very few words
Then what on earth makes him so incredibly popular with women??
I actually have no idea - every day he comes here, he just sits there quietly, drinking his beer, l**... his eyebrows..
Three women are changing at the gym when a man wearing nothing but a ski mask enters the changeroom and starts dancing in front of the women.
The first woman looks at the man and says, "I don't know who this guy is, but he isn't my husband!"
The second woman takes a closer look at the man. Then she turns to the first woman and says, "You are right. He isn't your husband."
The third woman takes an even closer look and says, "He's not even a member of this gym."
