Following is our collection of Women jokes which are very funny. There are some women boyfriends jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these women feminist puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
I said no. I can't deal with high maintenance women
12 years old and mixed up with coke.
Disclaimer: This is just a joke, i do not condone the practice of mixing whiskey with coke.
I've never had coffee but it smells really nice
But when I got out of prison, it was totally worth it
'Mmm?'
'Not that many!'
Educated and free.
She couldn't do either!
When you're a billionaire.
Because they've been lied to about what 8 inches look like their whole lives.
Then they call me ugly and poor.
Their knees.
(Not sure if this one translates well to english)
You can explore women people reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean women feminism dad jokes. There are also women puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
1. You should find a woman that helps you with the cleaning and the chores,
2. You should find a woman that is a good cook,
3. You should find a woman that you can trust and share your feelings with,
4. You should find a woman that enjoys making love to you,
5. Last and the most important thing is that these 4 women should never meet.
They had obviously been drinking a lot, and were speaking loudly with heavy accents. After an hour he becomes annoyed with the noise, walks over to them and asks, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but are you two ladies from Scotland?"
"Wales, you idiot!", shouts the fattest one.
"I'm sorry," he says. "Are you two whales from Scotland?"
A man with a very small head walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "Why is your head so small?"
He replies, "I was stuck on this island and there was nothing but beautiful women there who had never seen a man before. So I had sex with all of them. Their leader, who was the most beautiful of all, had the power to grant anybody one wish, so I asked her to have sex with me. She said she would grant me anything but that, so I said, "Would a little head be out of the question?"
And says "ladies, is anything ok?"
Man:"Why did you make women so beautiful?"
God:"So you would love her."
Man:"Then why did you make her so dumb?"
God:"So she would love you."
The Trump card.
On my lap.
Turned on.
Virus free.
I support killing babies, but I don't support giving women a choice.
Hot, clean, and she'll kill any baby I put inside her.
Today i asked a pretty young homeless women if i could take her home, and she said yes with a big smile.
The look on her face soon changed when i walked off with her cardboard box.
And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
But now that I'm out of prison I can honestly say that it was worth it.
But not my Sister.
I laughed and replied, "Don't be silly, he gave us women."
Wedding cake
Men are so polite, they only look at the covered parts.
So we can think about a solution in silence.
My girlfriend asked me to name all the women I've slept with.
I probably should've stopped when I got to her.
Because Jewish women won't touch anything that's not 10% off
There's only one iron.
They're like, "Hey, what's your friends name?" Never works on me ladies.
Roman 1: you won't believe how many women I've slept with
Roman 2: mmm?
Roman 1: don't be ridiculous, not that many
If you count the women
Because Jewish women refuse to touch anything that isn't at least 10% off
Nothing, they're fine.
So if you're a good driver watch out.
but it's a lot harder to **deter gents**.
Friends.
Round and irrational.
Happy Pi Day everyone!
...I only look at the covered parts.
So men may think on a solution in silence
Turns out it's consent.
The Trump card.
Even in the afterlife, XXX is still beating women
That's because women like to kill one man slowly over many many years.
I ask her: I have lost my wife, can I talk to you?
She replies: Why?
I say: You will see in 20 seconds.
She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walked behind their husbands, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime and women seemed happy to maintain the old custom.
Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you still abide by an old custom, that you once tried so desperately to change?"
The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, "Land mines."
She asked why I broke up with the last girl and I said
"It didn't work out."
She told me to be more specific so I said
"I just told you, she didn't exercise."
The Frenchman says, They must be French, they're naked and they're eating fruit.
The Englishman says, Clearly, they're English; observe how politely the women is offering fruit to the man.
The Soviet replies, No, they are Russian communists, of course. They have no house, nothing to wear, little to eat, and they think they are in Paradise.
Because for the last 200 years they've been told that three inches are actually six.
I said no; I can't deal with high maintenance women.
Trying to sound cool, I told her I like my coffee like I like my women. And that's when she told me "That's cute honey, but the coffee's free. You don't have to pay for it here!"
She said "I'm Alexa you moron."
Short and insecure
It'd be a pain in the ass.
It's the pastryarchy.
He starts to introduce himself before the woman cuts him off.
"Before you talk to me I want you to agree to follow Schwarzenegger's rule." She says.
The man asks, "What's Schwarzenegger's rule?" To which the woman responds:
"If you spoke to Arnold Schwarzenegger the way some men speak to women you'd get your ass kicked, so don't say anything to me that you wouldn't say to him."
The man pauses for a moment before proudly proclaiming, "you've got a NICE chest."
A blonde woman heard that milk baths would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.
The milkman read the note, and thought there must be a mistake. He asked the women if she meant 2.5 gallons.
The blonde woman said, "No, I want 25 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath so I can look young and beautiful again."
The milkman asked, "Do you want the milk to be pasteurized?"
The blonde said, "No, just up to my boobs. I can splash it on my eyes."
Strong.
You thought I was gonna say black didn't you, ya son of a bitch
A young, beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to an old woman and says arrogantly, "Giorgio Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!"
Another young, beautiful woman gets onto the elevator and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to the old woman and says, "Chanel No. 5, $150 dollars an ounce!"
About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both of the women in the eyes, farts, and says, "Broccoli, 49 cents a pound!"
The rest of us would be happier if women wore nothing.
He goes back to get it, stops halfway and turns back.
"What's up?" asks his mate.
"Well, you see those two women at the tee. One's my wife, and she's playing with my mistress."
His mate laughs and says, "No worries, I'll go get it for you."
He stops halfway, comes back, looks at his mate and says "Small world."
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the women women and hockey jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working women women with big breasts piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.