Winks Jokes
35 winks jokes and hilarious winks puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about winks that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Winks Short Jokes
Short winks jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The winks humour may include short winked jokes also.
- Jesus walks into a bar with his disciples... "Thirteen glasses of water, please!", Jesus said to the barman, winking at the others...
- About 4,000 years ago: God: I shall create a great plague and every living thing on Earth will die!
Fish: *Winks at God and slips him a $20 note*
God: Correction, I shall create a great flood! - I didn't sleep a wink last night because my neighbor was screaming her head off. I think she doesn't like my basement.
- When is the only time you're smiling and winking at your mother in law? When you're looking at her through a rifle scope.
- So, Jesus and the Apostles walk into a Bar... Jesus motions to the bartender, says "13 waters, please," and winks at the apostles.
- This girl winked at me and said she wanted to go somewhere quiet. So I took her to the library.
- Jesus Christ walks into bar Orders 12 glasses of water, looks at his disiples and gives them a wink.
- me trying to impress my crush me:
I heard you like bad guys only
.
.
.
well, I am bad....at everything.
*winks with both eyes* - "Hey man, the hot girl from class winked at me today!" "Really, bro?"
"Yeah, with both eyes too!" - Jesus walks into a bar with his deciples He walks up to the bartender and orders 13 waters and turns around and winks
Share These Winks Jokes With Friends
Winks One Liners
Which winks one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with winks? I can suggest the ones about wiggle and kinks.
- A cute girl winked at me She must be extra interested because she winked with both eyes.
- Jesus walks into a bar 12 glasses of water please
*winks at his disciples* - When my wife asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I winked. She bought me eye drops.
- Jesus walks into a bar. Jesus: 12 waters please! *winks at disciples.
- A girl winked at me.... With her both eyes
- Whst should a man call a wink from his wife ? Wife eye connection.
- My only problem with women breastfeeding in public is... ...they never wink back.
- How do government employees wink when they're at work? They briefly open one eye.
- How do you spell blinking with one I? Wink ;)
- Jesus walks into a bar "Just 12 waters please", while winking at his disciples.
- A hot girl just winked at me with both eyes Later virgins!
- What do you rate Megan Fox out of 10? Friend: 9
Me: 9? I'll give her one.. *wink* - Does Mike Wazowski blink or wink? He bwinks. The kids had it right all along!
- What do you call someone who thinks that the moon is winking at him? A lunatic
- The Forums wink face war ";)"
Hilarious Winks Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
What funny jokes about winks you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean wrinkles jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make winks pranks.
A white woman takes a black man she met a club home...
...She takes him by the hand to the bedroom and winks at him and says: "why don't you show me if what they say about black guys is true." So he stabs her and steals her TV.
P.S: don't worry, it's ok for me to make such jokes because I'm racist.
A man walks in to a bar
And sees an ugly old humpback of a guy, who is constantly surrounded by women.
How to spot a millionaire, am I right? he winks and smiles at the bartender
No, Larry is a plumber, not a millionaire
Okay - so he must be extremely charming?
Larry is actually a man of very few words
Then what on earth makes him so incredibly popular with women??
I actually have no idea - every day he comes here, he just sits there quietly, drinking his beer, l**... his eyebrows..
A man enters a cafetaria and is welcomed by a pretty girl behind the counter. While browsing through the menu, he notices that its last item reads: h**... - $15'.
The girl asks: 'Can I help?
'Yes,' says the man, 'the h**..., are you the one giving them?'
The lady winks and says: 'I sure am, handsome!'
The man: 'Could you then wash your hands, I'd like to order a hamburger.'
Jesus walks into a bar…
… and orders Twelve glasses of water please.
*** WINKS AT DISCIPLES ***
Kids walks in on parents having s**...
A kid walks by his parents room and sees his parents having s**.... The dad notices his son standing there so he just winks and keeps on going. The next day the dad walks by his sons room and sees his son plowing into grandma. The kids turns to his dad and says " not so funny when it's your mom is it?"
Jesus and Moses are at a lake in heaven
They both want to see if their powers still work
so moses splits the lake, walks right through, and says "alright jesus, now you try it"
So jesus tries to walk atop the waters but winks right through, and swims to the other side.
"What happened?" Moses asks, "Did you lose balance or something?"
"Well last time I didn't have holes in my feet"
A man goes to audition for an anchor position at a local tv station
A man goes to the television station auditioning for an anchor position.
He sits down in front of the camera and begins, soon it is obvious that he has a terrible stutter, and hisleft eye continuously winks.
The producer says, "Thank you for your audition, we'll let you know."
The man says, "W-w-wait a moment, I c-c-can fix this."
He opens his breifcase, and about 200 condoms fall out, he digs deeper and pulls out a bottle of aspitin.
He take a single aspirin, and then re-reads his copy perfectly, his wink having vanished.
The producer is dumbfounded, and he says, "Thanks fantastic, but what's with the condoms?"
The man says, "This is what they give you if you stutter and wink and ask for aspirin at the pharmacy.
A man walks into a bar. Upon sitting down a b**... blond waitress pours him a drink and asks if he would like some food.
He looks up at the menu above the bar. It says Hot Dog $2, Cheeseburger $5, and h**... $10.
He asks the waitress, "Miss, are you the one who gives the h**...?"
She winks and replies, "Why yes I am." He says, "Well wash your hands, I want a cheeseburger."
A plane from J.F.K. is coming in to land at a rural airport in Arkansas at midnight.
Mouthy pilot turns to his co-pilot, winks & says "watch this"......
"Pilot to control tower......hey there h**..., guess who!!"
Control tower switches off the airport lights.....
"Control tower to pilot....... Hey there Yankee, guess *where!!*"
A guy walks into a flower shop
He buys beautiful, red flowers. As he's paying for them, the cashier winks at him and says "I hope these get you laid tonight".
The guy says "I hope not ... they're for my mom"
Me and my wife are perfect for each other. She likes bad boys.
And I'm bad at everything.
**winks with both eyes*
Mary had the only bull in the village.
John decides it's time to take his cow to a bull, and so he went to Mary. As they were both watching the two animals do their thing, John looks at Mary and winks, saying "Mary, would you let me do what your bull is doing?", and she replies "Well John, it's your cow..."
Kool-Aid Man breaks through wall.
"Oh ya!"
[breaks 2nd wall]
"Oh ya!"
[3rd wall]
"OHHH YEAAHH!"
[breaks 4th wall]
*Winks at camera*
A man walks into a bar and orders 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender lines them up and the man knocks them back one after the other. Then the man orders 4 more, again the bartender lines them up and the man knocks them back. The bartender says, "Gee, buddy I've never seen anybody drink like that."
The man replies, "Youd drink like that too if you had what I have." "Oh my god" buddy! What do you have?" The man winks and says... "fifty cents."
