Wing Jokes
154 wing jokes and hilarious wing puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about wing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking to laugh? This article has something for everyone. Enjoy chicken wing, West Wing, Red Wing, boneless wing, bingo wing, Buffalo Wild Wing, fixed wing, tern, existentialism, and wingless jokes. Make sure to check out this article for a good laugh.
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Funniest Wing Short Jokes
Short wing jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The wing humour may include short wind jokes also.
- A plane carrying Donald Trump made an emergency landing in New Orleans after alleged engine failure over the Gulf of Mexico. Turns out there was just a loud whine coming from the right wing.
- What's got two eyes, but can't see, two wings, but can't fly, and two legs, but can't walk? A dead bird.
- What has 2 wings and 1 Arrow ? A Chinese telephone
Wing
Wing
Arrow?
(posted this last year got some good feedback) - What's the difference between the USA and a bird? On a bird, the left wing and the right wing work together to benefit the whole bird.
- I found a butterfly without wings... So I poured some RedBull on it and BAM... It drowned.
- A pig with wings walks into a bar. Stunned, the bartender says "You can't bring food in here from another restaurant! Even if you are a cop!"
- I think I just made the best dad joke ever. My son Robbie asked how he should get Poe into his X-wing toy. I said Wedge him. I had no one else to tell.
- I have an eating disorder... I'm about to eat dis order of fries, dis order of wings, and dis order of nuggets.
- What has eight legs, two arms, two wings, and three heads? A person on a horse holding a chicken.
- I regret joining a band with a turkey on drums. He usually forgets his drumsticks so he has to wing it.
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Wing One Liners
Which wing one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with wing? I can suggest the ones about hawk and worm.
- What's Icarus' least favorite food? hot wings
- What has TWO wings, and ONE arrow? A Chinese telephone.
Wing wing. Arrow? - I would never get on a plane with Ben Shapiro He would try to destroy the left wing.
- Who doesn't like hot wings? Icarus
- What happens when you call a duck? His phone wings
- I have 600 legs, 30 arms, a pair of wings, and 1000 eyes. What am I? A liar.
- What has two wings and a halo? A Japanese phone,
Wing wing, "halo?" - What do you call a Chinese fly with no wings? A wok.
- What do you get when you take the wings off of a fly? A walk
- Why did Ben Shapiro destroy a kfc restaurant? 'Cause they served him left wings.
- What has two wings and a halo? A chinese man on the phone! Wing wing, halo?
- Why don't birds study for tests? They like to wing it
- What has two wings and a halo? An Asian phone call; "Wing, Wing, Halo!?"
- What do you call a bird with 3 wings and 3 legs? Triangull
- Never take a plane with Ben Shapiro He will destroy the left wing
Right Wing Jokes
Here is a list of funny right wing jokes and even better right wing puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- American politics is like a penguin. It has both a left wing and a right wing. But are only good for flapping and making noises.
- My dad is so right wing... he won't even have leftovers!
-I'll let myself out. - I guess politicians are just a bunch of chickens. Ya got the right wing and the left wing.
- How do you starve a right wing christian? Hide their money in their bible.
- I was considering telling a vaccine joke to a right wing coworker of mine but didn't because he probably wouldn't get it anyways.
- What part of a hospital does an abortion patient avoid? The right wing
- Why do right wing extremists hate winter? Because of all the snowflakes
- The cable news networks tend to cater to different groups Fox News is for right wings, MSNBC is for left wings, and CNN is for plane wings.
- Why do late night comedians skew left wing? Because the right wing viewers have to work in the morning.
- My right-wing sister accused me of getting indoctrinated by my college professors for my left-wing ideologies. I tell her "You're just jealous because I actually *finished* college."
Left Wing Jokes
Here is a list of funny left wing jokes and even better left wing puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- (Politics) Why would it be unsafe to board a plane with Ben Shapiro? He'd destroy the Left Wing.
- Did yo hear about the Hillary special at KFC? Two fat thighs and a left wing for $2.99
- If I were ever to win the lottery, first thing I'd do is hire someone to clean my kids room... and then buy some chicken wings with the $20 I have left over.
- What would Ben shapiro do if he had to stop 911? He would destroy the left wing.
- Why can't Ben Shapiro fly an airplane? He always destroys the left wing.
- Why did the mad scientist stitch the three left-wing politicians together? He was trying to make a right-wing one.
- Why did Bernie Sanders's chicken restaurant throw out so much food? He only sold left wings.
- What do you call left-wing felines? Democats.
- Ben Shapiro dies in a plane c**.... Wanna know why it crashes? LEFT WING DESTROYED
- Fox News has determined the cause of the recent plane c**.... It was the left wing.
Red Wing Jokes
Here is a list of funny red wing jokes and even better red wing puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Butterfly I saw a butterfly with no wings today. I poured some Red Bull on it and BAM... it drowned
- Chuck Norris once drank a Red Bull and the can grew wings.
- I bought a Monster energy drink for my wheelchair-ridden co-worker. It's a shame we don't sell Red Bull, because who needs legs when you could have wings?
- What happens when a red and white X-Wing crashes into green water? It gets wet.
- My girlfriend says I'm better than Moses. Not only did I part the red sea, but I also earned my red wings.
- They say red bull gives you wings All it gave me was a heart attack
- Q:Why don't hockey players drink tea?
A:Because the Canadiens and Red Wings have all the cups. - How do you get buffalo wings? You give a buffalo Red Bull.
- What must a vampire earn to learn to fly? His red wings.
- The Air-force Cadets get Red Bull in their ration packs Because apparently it gives them wings
Chicken Wing Jokes
Here is a list of funny chicken wing jokes and even better chicken wing puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I fed my chickens a chicken wing... I guess you could say they enjoyed themselves. *ba dum tss*
- A guy calls his local butchery... - Do you have chicken paws?
- Yes
- Do you have chicken wings?
- Yes, I do
- Do you have pig's head?
- Sure
- You must look really funny then - My local KFC will be celebrating star wars day on May 4th with an Anakin special. It's an extra crispy chicken with no legs and only one wing.
- I like my Holy Infants the way I like my chicken wings.., Tender and mild.
- Kentucky Fried Chicken just donated a large sum of money to a hospital I heard they are calling it the Chicken Wing
- Why did the Chicken not cross the road? Because he winged it
- Why don't chickens like to plan? They rather wing it
- From my 8 year old daughter. How do you make a rooster fly? Chicken wings
- What has six eyes, four wings and eight legs? Two chickens and a goat.
- Where did Neanderthals get their chicken wings? Cave-FC
Laughter Wing Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity
What funny jokes about wing you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean wolf jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make wing pranks.
Asian phone book
Do you know why Asians have a phone book?
Because there's so many Wing and so many Wong someone might Wing the Wong number
I saw a butterfly earlier
With a tattoo of a s**... on it's wing.
A vulture tries to get on an airplane
A vulture tries to get on an airplane with a raccoon under each wing.
The pilot stops him saying, "Sorry, you're only allowed one carry-on."
Why is it never a good idea to use a Chinese phone book?
There are so many Wings and Wongs, you might wing a wong number.
Picabo Street is a former World Cup alpine ski racer and model. When she was inducted into the National Ski Hall of Fame in 2004, her home town of Triumph, Idaho dedicated an entire wing of the local hospital to her.
It's called the Picabo ICU.
A vulture is boarding a plane with a dead raccoon under each wing, when the gate attendant stops him and says, "I'm sorry, sir..."
"...but you're only allowed *one* carrion."
There are 11 blondes...
hanging on the wings of an airplane. 5 on one wing, and 6 on another, and due to this, theres an imbalance and the plane will c**.... So they all decided that one of the blonde has to let go, so the wings are balanced.
After a lot of discussion, one brave blonde decides that she'll sacrifice herself for the others. She lets go, and the rest of the 10 blondes start clapping, applauding her for her bravery.......
Hope you guys like it, nd sorry if its a xpost.
What sound does a turkey’s phone make?
Wing! Wing!
The difference between birds
A new study from a renowned bird journal found the difference between crows and ravens.
Apparently, aside from size, their wings are made differently. The common crow has six pinions per wing, while the raven has only five.
The conclusion: It is only a difference of a pinion.
A duck walks in to an alternative medicine practicioners office. Points a wing at him and says with a frown:
"Quack!"
Why dont they use phone books in China?
Because they have so many Wing's and Wong's
That they might Wing the Wong Numba!!!
My 8 year old son made me laugh with a dad joke...
We were trying to decide where to eat, I offered up Buffalo Wild Wings, but my son and daughter were being indecisive. I finally said ok guys, make up your mind My son replied with a c**... grin "C'mon Mom we'll just wing it"...he then burst into laughter for five minutes....his fathers humor is really rubbing off on him.
Why doesn't China have a phone directory?
Because there are so many Wings and Wongs they'd still wing the wong number.
TIL: Phonebooks are banned in China
Because there are so many Wings and so many Wongs, you might Wing the Wong number.
A plane was once flying over an island..
A plane was once flying over an island when the passengers heard the pilot's voice:
Ladies & Gentlemen, if you look on the right side of the plane, you'll see an engine on fire. If you look on the left side, you'll see a wing on fire. And if you look down, you'll see me and my co-pilot in parachutes, waving at you. This is a recording.
What has 3 wings and flies?
The mortuary.
Penguin Comedian
An ill-prepared penguin comedian was about to go onstage.
"I'll just wing it," he said.
I replied, "You ain't gonna fly with the audience."
Why is it so difficult to call Chinese people?
There's so many wings it's easy to wing the wong number.
Birds that have mating rituals...
I bet they just wing it.
What kind of martial arts do birds practice?
Wing Chun
A vulture tries to board a plane whilst carrying a dead rabbit under his wing.
The flight attendant stops him, shaking his head.
"Sorry sir, you can't bring that on here. No carrion."
A pastor is speaking to his church.
A pastor is speaking to his church. He tells them, 'I have good and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay off all the church debts and build a new wing to the church.'
The congregation clapped and cheered.
He continues. 'The bad news is, it's still in your pockets.'
What is the difference between a raven and a crow??
Well, ravens and crows both have large feathers on their wings called 'pinions'. Ravens have 4 pinions on each wing while crows only have 3.
So if you think about it, it's just a matter of a pinion
If you take the wings off a fly...
Does that make it a walk?
Two Bald Eagles
A bald eagle decides to stop by a small lake to get a drink. As he's drinking another bald eagle lands next to him.
He looks at the eagle and notices a tulip, a rose, and a rabbit's foot on top of his head.
"What's with the stuff on your head?", the eagle asks.
"Oh this?", he points to his head with his wing, "I'm trying hare in plants."
An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman each order a pint. Just then, a fly drops in each of their Guinness.
The Englishman says: "How dreadful. Barkeep, take this pint back at once, I couldn't possibly touch it, it has a fly in it!"
The Scotsman says: "Ach, it's nae so bad!" and flicks the fly out with the back of his hand and c**... his beer.
The Irishman gingerly picks up the fly by the wing, gives the fly a little wiggle and says: "You spit that out! You spit that out!"
If jesus played football, what position would he play?
Not on the wing he doesn't do well with crosses.
What did the Korean fried chicken wing say to the fried chicken leg?
Boy, I wish I could fry.
An eagle checks in at the airline ticket counter with a dead rabbit under one wing. The agent asks, "do you want to check the rabbit?"
"No, this is carrion."
How many wings does a turkey need to answer the phone?
I'll let you know. The phone is still winging.
What do you call a Pelican with a broken wing?
A pelicant.
Why is it so difficult to phone people in China?
The country is so full of Wings and Wongs, every time you wing you get the wong number.
I just saw a man survive getting hit by a plane wing
Massive props to him.
What's a bumblebee's favorite wing sauce?
Pollenesian
Why are there no Chinese names in the phone book?
Because there's too many wings and too many wongs so you might wing the wong number.
China's Communist Party is starting a militia wing
They're training their members to be good Marxmen
My sister asked me how I do my eyeliner.
I told her I wing it.
What happened to the eagle when it broke its wing?
It got grounded.
How Do You Have A Party On A Plane?
You wing it!
Did you hear about the new wing at Sea World for all critically injured dolphins?
It's basically a hospital for all intensive porpoises
What do you call someone who likes both the flat and drum chicken wing types?
Biwingual
Wingardium Leviosauh
First, you Hufflepuff my Ravenclaw,
Then I Slytherin your Gryffindor
Why are there no phones in China?
There's so many wings and wongs you might wing the wong number
Which way does a cyclops wing their eyeliner?
It doesn't matter because Nobody will judge them anyway!
what bee no wing
walk
What's Robert Kraft's favorite wing flavor?
Dry rub!
What's got wings and s**... blood?
Always ultra
Plane confused?
just wing it.
The university president was inconsolable when the wing housing social sciences and languages burned down.
"Oh, the Humanities!" he cried.
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone.
The problem with voting based on your beliefs rather than your situation in life
Left wing girls won't date me because they don't like my views
Right wing girls won't date me because I don't have a job
Wait, I just checked with the left wing girls
They said they wouldn't date a guy with no job either
Left wing or Right wing, it doesn't really matter.
If either is harmed the plane will c**....
Dracula was casually walking down the street for a late night stroll.
All of a sudden, a mozzarella stick flies through the air and hits him on the side of the head. He looks around slightly perplexed, but doesn't think too much of it.
A few meters further on and a chicken wing smacks him in the nuts. As he doubles over in pain, out of nowhere, he is drenched in hot nacho cheese.
He looks to the sky with a raised fist and shouts, "Curse you Buffet the Vampire Slayer!".
A vulture arrives at the airport check-in. He's carrying a dead rabbit under one wing.
"Return ticket to Death Valley please."
"Pleasure trip?"
"Yup, sort of a u-pick kind of thing."
"LOL, very good! Ok, here you go. Are you checking the rabbit?"
"No, this is carrion."
Why don't birds prepare for speeches?
They like to wing it.
A vulture is walking down the jetway at the airport.
He has two dead badgers, one under each wing. The stewardess stops him and says, "I'm sorry sir, you're only allowed one carrion."
What do you call a phoenix with a broken wing?
Joaquin Phoenix.
This is Captain Leonardo Ricardo speaking,
On behalf of my crew and I, I'd like to welcome you on board flight 633 from New York to Abu Dhabi. We are on the air above 38,000 feet across Atlantic Ocean.
If you you look outside the window, you will see that the wing has fallen off and the engine is on fire. If you look down the window, you will see a little yellow boat on the ocean. Inside the boat are 3 people waving at you, that's me, the Co-pilot and your Air hostess.
This is a recorded message. Have a good flight!
What is the LGBT wing of the Klu Klux k**... called?
The Gay KK
What's the difference between a crow and a raven?
A Raven has 17 feathers at the end of it's wing, these feathers help with flight and are known as pinion feathers. Where the Raven has 17 of them a Crow only has 16 of these feathers.
So the difference between a Crow and a Raven is a matter of a pinion.
