William Tell Jokes
13 william tell jokes and hilarious william tell puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about william tell that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest William Tell Short Jokes
Short william tell jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The william tell humour may include short william name jokes also.
- William Shakespeare chewed on his pencil so much... ...that eventually he couldn't tell if it was 2B or not 2B.
- I own a pencil used by William Shakespeare He used to chew on it a lot though, so I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B
- William Shakespear walks into a bar... ..the bouncer sees him and throws him out of the door.
"You can't come in here", the bouncer tells Will, "you're Bard!" - William Tell and his family used to be league bowlers... but now that the records have been lost, it is difficult to determine for whom the Tells bowled.
- I own a pencil that used to be owned by William Shakespeare, but he chewed it a lot. Now I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B.
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William Tell One Liners
Which william tell one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with william tell? I can suggest the ones about teller and tell tale.
- Where does William Tell take his garbage? To the dump to the dump to the dump^dump^dump
William Tell Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about william tell you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean william shakespeare jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make william tell pranks.
My favorite Robin Williams joke
U2 is playing a concert in Scotland, and as a hush comes over the crowd, Bono starts clapping his hands above his head very slowly.
As he claps, he tells the crowd, "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies." And a man stands up in the back of the room, and shouts "Then stop clappin' your hands!"
Thanks, Robin.
The teacher tells the students:
You have to tell me what part of my body do you like the most, and I will tell you what will you be when you grow up. Let's see, Paul, which part of my body do you like the most?
I love your long hair, teacher.
Nice, Paul! You will be a hairdresser when you grow up. And you, Peter, what is your favourite part?
My favourite part of you are your teeth, teacher.
You will be a dentist, Peter, when you grow up. William, it's your turn.
I really like your blue eyes, teacher.
You will be a very good oculist when you grow up, William. And you, Johnny, which part of my body do you like the most?
I think I don't need to say it. I just found out I want to be a milkman when older!
A man faced with death will have his life spared if he can explain the song being visually represented by a flock of n**... women.
The man is led to an empty concert hall where 8 n**... women are being led in.
They were placed so that the first one was facing him, the second
with her back to him, the third facing him, the fourth with her back to him, the fifth facing him, and the last three with their backs to him.
"Guess that song!" his oppressor demanded.
"Ah, that one's easy!," he exclaimed, triumphantly.
"It's William Tell Overture...
t**... r**... t**... r**... t**... r**... r**... r**...."
First day as SOLDIER!
A new soldier was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear.
>**"No car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield"**
A big army car came up with a general seated in the back. The sentry said, "Halt, who goes there?"
The chauffeur says, "General William."
"I'm sorry, I can't let you through. You've got to have a sticker on the windshield."
The general said, "Drive on!"
The sentry said, "Hold it! You really can't come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker."
The general repeated, "I'm telling you, son, drive on!"
The sentry walked up to the rear window and said, "General, I'm new at this. *Do i shoot you or the driver?*"
The legend of Sorry the archer.
An archery contest is taking place, and all the top archers of Europe are in attendance. The final begins, and the three greatest archers must compete in shooting an apple from a little girls head.
The first archer steps up. He draws, and fires an arrow right through the apple. The audience applauds, he bows and proclaims "I am Robin Hood!"
The second archer steps up. He draws, and also hits the apple. He waves his hat at the cheering crowd, and cries out "I am William Tell."
The third archer steps up. He draws, and fires his arrow through the little girls eye. Blood sprays everywhere, the audience gasps and ladies faint. He takes his hat off, and announces "I am Sorry".
Three men line up to show off their skills at archery
They are to shoot off the apple off of a young boy's head. The first one draws his arrow back, shoots, hits the apple clean off of the boy's head, and says, "I am Robin Hood!". The second one draws his arrow back, shoots, hits the apple of the boy's head, and says, "I am William Tell!". The third one draws his arrow back, shoots, hits the poor boy in the skull, who then proceeds to drop dead. The archer looks at what he has done, takes off his hat, and whispers, "I am sorry."