Width Jokes
21 width jokes and hilarious width puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about width that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Width Short Jokes
Short width jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The width humour may include short height jokes also.
- 39 digits of pi accurately calculates the circumference of the universe to the width of a hydrogen atom Scientists still can't determine how much is needed for your mother though
- Math Problem Q: If the the radius of a pizza is *z* and its width is *a*, what is the pizza's volume?
A: (pi)(z)(z)(a) - Tickets for the Indiana State Philharmonic went up dramatically after they doubled the width of the stage. You didn't think that the ISP would give out twice the band width for free did you?
- If you laid every atom in the sun end to end, it would be roughly 3.0818632e+23 times the width of the universe, or roughly 1.1701458e+43 lightyears. That's almost as wide as your mother.
- Why did the watch company start their own ISP? Because they had the time and the band width.
- So my grandmother came up to me and asked me to cut a piece of fabric into strips for her. I asked her "What width?" She replied: "with scissors of course."
- Pennywise the clown talked to me about the idea of multiplying a prism's length width and height. It spoke volumes to me.
- I was walking my dog around my building ...on the ledge.
Some people are afraid of heights. I'm afraid of widths.
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Width One Liners
Which width one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with width? I can suggest the ones about wide and size.
- Some people have a fear of heights. Not me, I have a fear of widths.
- A lot of people are afraid of heights Not me, I'm afraid of widths
- Anyone afraid of heights? ...are you afraid of widths, too?
- I'm not afraid of heights I'm afraid of widths
Credit- Stephen Wright - Why would Jesus of been a good pornstar? He was hung arms width
- Men are like prisms All that matters is length, width, and height.
- Responsive web designers who date online... ...never specify height. Just width.
- People say m**... makes you high But I've not increased in height, only in width
Rib-Tickling Width Jokes that Bring Friends Together
What funny jokes about width you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dimension jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make width pranks.
Here is an actual sign posted in a golf club.
1. Back straight, knees bent.
2. Feet shoulder width apart.
3. Form a loose grip.
4. Keep your head down!
5. Stay out of the water.
6. Try not to hit anyone.
7. If you are taking too long, let others go ahead of you.
8. Don't stand directly in front of others.
9. Quiet please while others are preparing.
10. Don't take extra strokes.
Well done. Now, flush the u**... and go outside and tee off.
Golf is like urinating in a public toilet
- Keep your back straight
- knees bent.
- Feet shoulder width apart.
- Form a loose Grip
- keep your head down
- avoid a quick backswing
- stay out of the water
- try not to hit anybody
- if you taking too long you should let others go ahead of you
- you shouldn't stand directly in front of others
- be quite when others are about to go
- keep strokes to a minimum
I used to work in an art supply store.
I used to work in an art supply store. We sold artists' canvas by the yard, and you could get it in either of two widths: 36 inches or 48 inches.
Customer: "Can you please cut some canvas for me?"
Me: "Certainly, what width?"
Customer: (confused and slightly annoyed) "Scissors?"
I did the math on Hurricane Florence rain fall...
There is predicted to be 17 Trillion gallons of rain falling from Florence.
The width of a milk jug is 5.5"
Rain x Width = 93 Trillion inches
93 Trillion divided by 12 gets you 7,791,6**...,6**...,6**... Feet
Divided by 5280
1,475,694,444 Miles
Divided by 93,000,000 miles to get Astronomical Units
You get 15.8 AU's.
You're so fat, that even though Florence is dropping 17 trillion gallons of rain, It's still not enough to get to Uranus.
Golf is like urinating in a public toilet
Golf is like urinating in a public toilet
1. Keep your back straight
2. knees bent.
3. Feet shoulder width apart.
4. Form a loose Grip
5. keep your head down
6. avoid a quick backswing
7. stay out of the water
8. try not to hit anybody
9. if you taking too long you should let others
go ahead of you
10. you shouldn't stand directly in front of others
11. be quite when others are about to go
12. keep strokes to a minimum
