The Best 33 Whispering Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Whispering jokes. There are some whispering psst jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these whispering yan puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Whispering Jokes and Puns

Visitor: My favorite part of the zoo is the cage that says 'World's most dangerous animal' and it's just a mirror in it

Zookeeper: Yup, thought-provoking stuff. \*Whispering into phone\* The leopard's escaped again

At a cocktail party...

an obstetrician's wife noticed that another guest, a big, oversexed blonde in a slinky red dress, was making overtures at her husband. As it was a large, informal gathering, she tried to laugh it off, until she saw the woman begin whispering into her husband's ear while her hand caressed his back.

At once she confronted the blonde bimbo and screamed, "Look, lady! My husband just delivers babies, he doesn't INSTALL them!"

Two kittens walk down the street together,

and as they talk, one kitten gets panicked and starts to yell:

-You won't believe what I heard the other day!!!

Ξ€he kitten reaches the others kitten's ear and starts whispering.

The other kitten gets a terrified look on its face and says:

-LESBIANS EAT WHAT?

Whispering joke, Two kittens walk down the street together,

A gorgeous student walks into her professor's office...

She says "Professor I'm really struggling in your class."

He say's "Ok it's good you're here then, what can I help you with?"

"Well I don't quite understand the material but honestly, I would do anything to pass."

"Anything?" He asks.

She leans in close and softly says "Anything."

He leans in closer, almost whispering as he asks:

"Would you, study?"

Two priests on a drive

Two priests are on a drive when they are pulled over by a state trooper. When the trooper gets to the window he tells the priests that he is out today looking for a couple pedophiles. The two priests look at each other and begin whispering really quietly. After a moment the priest in the driver's seat looks back up at the state trooper and says, "We'll do it!"


The sore throat

Carl, a young man, woke up and suffered from an awful sore throat and all but lost his voice. The small town's doctor operated out of his own home, so Carl made his way over, scratching at his sore throat.

Dr. Wendell's wife answered the door, "Yes?"
Carl, in a very quiet, breathy voice replied, "Is the doctor in?"
Mrs. Wendell replied in the same whispering tone, "No.... come on in!"

*-Groucho Marx*

What do you call a pirates thong?

A whispering eye patch.

Whispering joke, What do you call a pirates thong?

She Knows Why

**boy whispering to mum during wedding**

Boy: "Mummy?"

Mum: "What?

Boy: "Why is the lady dressed in white?"

Mum: "Because this is her happiest day in her life"

Boy: "... So Why is the man dressed in black?"

A shetland pony walks into a Burger King...

He walks up to the counter and whispers "I'll take one whopper please." The cashier says "sure, buy why are you whispering?" The pony looks up at him and says "sorry, I'm just a little hoarse"

A man and wife are in bed, when...

...when the man slides his hand slowly across her shoulders, across her waist, under her neck, under her back, & suddenly stops...

Wife: " ( In a romantic voice) Why did u stop?"

Man: "(Whispering) I found the remote. You can go back to sleep"

Whats the difference between a porsche and an erection?

I dont have a porsche.

(Best told by whispering in someones ear.)

You can explore whispering liberian reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean whispering mumble dad jokes. There are also whispering puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


How was school today?

Mom: Hi sweetie! How was school today?

Child: Alright I guess...The teacher said I could be President someday.

Mom: (*whispering to dad*) None of the other kids like him.

A guy says to a librarian "I'd like a Big Mac, French Fries and a Coke"

The librarian says "I'm sorry sir but this is a library".

The guy says *whispering* "Oh, sorry, I'd like a Big Mac, French Fries and a Coke"

A very drunk man walks into a bar

He yells:

two large beers and a packet of crisps please!

Lady: sir, this is a library.

Man, whispering: two large beers and a packet of crisps please!

My Chinese friend got really sick one day

I went to the hospital to see how he's doin, but he just kept whispering Yang qi guan! Yang qi guan! Yang qi guan!" over and over – and then died.

I was very sad and a few days later I googled his last message after the burial. Apparently, it means You're standing on my oxygen tube.

A guy walks into a library

And asks for a burger and fries, the librarian replies

"Sir this is a library"

And so the man responds

*whispering*
"Id like a burger and fries please"

Whispering joke, A guy walks into a library

A man got a sore throat and goes to a doctor's house

He knocks on the door and the doctor's wife opens the door "is the doctor home?" He asks whispering because of his throat. The wife looks outside, sees no one and whispers "No, he's not. Come in".

I like to freak people out by going up to their cars and whispering...

I know your secret, Optimus Prime!"

A guy walks into a library...

A man walks in to a library and asks the librarian, "MAY I HAVE A HOTDOG?" The librarian whispers, "sir, this is a library." The man answers, "I'm so sorry" now whispering the man says,"may I have a hotdog?"


A man was sitting alone at the bar

A man was sitting alone at a bar, and he kept hearing this whispering that said Hey nice shoes. He looked around and nobody was there. He heard You look nice today he looked around and still nobody was there. Then he finally asked the bartender Am I going crazy or did you hear that? and the bartender said, It's the peanuts. They're complementary

A jealous boyfriend.

A jealous boyfriend catches his girlfriend whispering quietly into her cell phone very late one night. Are you cheating? her angry boyfriend asks. Is there somebody else? The girlfriend laughs and replies, Do you really think I'd still be dating you if there were someone else?

Schizophrenia is ADHD on hard mode.

"2+2=..... stop whispering my name grandma! You've been dead for 20 years!"

Besides a good time, what do you call it when the Fonz is whispering softly in your ear?

AyyyySMR

A man walks into a library ...

Man, to librarian: ** "I'd like a quarter pounder with cheese, and a large coke."**

Librarian (whispering): "Sir, you are at the library."

Man (now whispering): "Oh, I'm sorry. I'd like a quarter pounder with cheese, and a large coke."

My son thinks that a German goalkeeper keeps whispering in his ear.

It's a little bit of paraNeuer

Why was the one keyboard whispering to the other keyboard?

It was case sensitive

My son asked me why I was whispering all quiet.

I told him I thought the CIA was listening. He laughed. I laughed. Amazon Echo laughed.

John gave his hillbilly cousin Billy a phonecard. "You can make calls with this ." John then went to get a drink.

In the corner of his eye, he noticed Billy whispering frantically into the card: "Hello? Hello? Can you hear me?"

The operator got annoyed at me for whispering..

but I don't get it, they said themselves they're 'experiencing unsually high call volume'

Boss: Why do you-

Me: *sshhh*

Boss: What is your biggest wea-

Me: *sshhh*

Boss: (whispering) you're hired. Welcome to the library.

My wife asked me why I was whispering at home

I said I was worried that Mark Zuckerberg was listening. She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed. Siri laughed. We all laughed...

*At my boss's funeral, kneeling and whispering at coffin*

"Who's thinking outside the box now Karin?"

A limo driver is driving Gorbachev to a very important building

The limo driver suddenly passes out, Gorbachev decides to put the unconscious man in the back seats and drive instead




Once he reaches the gate, two security guards start whispering to each other




Guard 1: "Uh, who is the person in the back?"




Guard 2: "I don't know, but he must be very important, since Gorbachev is his driver"

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the whispering smile jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working whispering whisperer piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes