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Whipped Cream Jokes

51 whipped cream jokes and hilarious whipped cream puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about whipped cream that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Whipped Cream Short Jokes

Short whipped cream jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The whipped cream humour may include short whipping cream jokes also.

  1. My farmer friend told me that horse manure is excellent for strawberries. I said, You may be right, but I still prefer whipped cream.
  2. I'm kinda new to gardening... Someone suggested I put horse manure on my strawberries.
    Well, I'm never doing that again...
    I'll just stick to whipped cream.
  3. I just saw the neighbor's kid trying to spray whipped cream on his cat. I'm thinking he overheard something last night in that house he wasn't supposed to...
  4. I really dislike whipped cream There's actually only one way I liked whipped cream, but that's personal.
  5. Why did the cook go to jail? For beating the eggs and whipping the cream!
  6. What is a b**... couple's favorite dessert? Whipped cream pie.
  7. What do you call a white s**...? Whipped Cream
  8. What do you call an albino in a b**... scene? Whipped cream.
  9. What did the milk with a whipping f**... say? "I just creamed myself."
  10. A chef asked a server for some items from the back. The server returned n**... with a smile and a can of whipped cream, and the chef angrily exclaimed...
    "THIS IS NEITHER THE THYME NOR THE PLATES!"

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Whipped Cream One Liners

Which whipped cream one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with whipped cream? I can suggest the ones about whipped and strawberries and cream.

  1. Why was the cook arrested? He was beating the eggs and whipping the cream.
  2. Why are chefs the meanest? Because they beat the eggs and whip the cream
  3. When are cooks at their meanest? When they mercilessly beat the eggs and whip the cream!
  4. What do you call a white guy in an abusive relationship? Whipped cream.
  5. I like my cream like I like my slaves. Whipped.
    *I'm so sorry*
  6. That chef must be sadistic. He's always beating eggs and whipping cream.
  7. Why do cows think cooks are mean?
    They whip cream!
  8. Why did the chef get arrested? Because he beat the eggs and whipped the cream!
  9. How does a cat make whipped cream? With it's whiskers.
  10. The best part about my wife deserting me was When she finished me off with whipped cream
  11. What do you call a dairy product madly in love? Whipped cream
  12. What did the whip cream say to Indiana Jones? Cool Whip
  13. Chefs are violent people... They beat eggs and whip cream.
  14. What do you call a black dairy farmer Whipped cream.
  15. My wife is getting fatter... I noticed when her whip cream bikini turned into a one piece

Laughter Whipped Cream Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity

What funny jokes about whipped cream you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean whip jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make whipped cream pranks.

There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful, so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so they don't forget. They went home and the old lady told her husband to get her a bowl of ice cream. "You might want to write it down," she said. The husband said, "No, I can remember that you want a bowl of ice cream." She then told her husband she wanted a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream. "Write it down," she told him, and again he said, "No, no, I can remember: you want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream." Then the old lady said she wants a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top. "Write it down," she told her husband and again he said, "No, I got it. You want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top." So he goes to get the ice cream and spends an unusually long time in the kitchen, over 30 minutes. He comes out to his wife and hands her a plate of eggs and bacon. The old wife stares at the plate for a moment, then looks at her husband and asks, "Where's the toast?"

There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful, so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so they don't forget. They went home and the old lady told her husband to get her a bowl of ice cream. "You might want to write it down," she said. The husband said, "No, I can remember that you want a bowl of ice cream." She then told her husband she wanted a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream. "Write it down," she told him, and again he said, "No, no, I can remember: you want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream." Then the old lady said she wants a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top. "Write it down," she told her husband and again he said, "No, I got it. You want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top." So he goes to get the ice cream and spends an unusually long time in the kitchen, over 30 minutes. He comes out to his wife and hands her a plate of eggs and bacon. The old wife stares at the plate for a moment, then looks at her husband and asks, "Where's the toast?"

There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful, so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so they don't forget. They went home and the old lady told her husband to get her a bowl of ice cream. "You might want to write it down," she said. The husband said, "No, I can remember that you want a bowl of ice cream." She then told her husband she wanted a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream. "Write it down," she told him, and again he said, "No, no, I can remember: you want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream." Then the old lady said she wants a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top. "Write it down," she told her husband and again he said, "No, I got it. You want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top." So he goes to get the ice cream and spends an unusually long time in the kitchen, over 30 minutes. He comes out to his wife and hands her a plate of eggs and bacon. The old wife stares at the plate for a moment, then looks at her husband and asks, "Where's the toast?"

A couple in their nineties were having trouble remembering things so they went to their doctor for checkups.
The doctor told them that they were both physically fine and advised them to write things down to help them remember.
Later that evening while watching television, the husband got up from his chair to go to the kitchen for a snack.
He asked his wife if she wanted anything.
“Could you bring me a bowl of ice cream?” she asked.
“Sure,” he replied.
“Do you think you should write that down to remember it?” she asked.
“No, I can remember that,” he said.
“I’d like some strawberries on it, too. Do you need to write that down?” she said.
“No, I can remember that, too. Ice cream with strawberries,” he said, becoming a little irritated.
“I’d like some whipped cream on it, too. Can you remember all that? The doctor said you should write things down,” she said.
“For goodness sakes, I can remember that. I don’t need to write it down. A bowl of ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream,” he said, now more than a little irritated.
Off he went to the kitchen.
About 20 minutes later he returned with a plate of bacon and eggs.
The wife stared at it for a moment and said, “Where’s my toast?”

A couple in their 80's

A couple in their 80's were having problems remembering things, so they decided to the go the doctor for a checkup. The doctor tells them that they are physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember.
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. His wife asks, "Where are you going?" "To the kitchen for a drink," he replies. She asks, " Will you get me piece of cake?" The husband says, "Sure." She gently reminds him, "Don't you think you should write it down so you don't forget it?" He says, "No, I can certainly remember that!"
Then the woman says, "Well, I'd like some strawberries on top. You'd better write it down because I know you'll forget it." The man replies, "I can remember that! You want some cake with strawberries."
She adds, "I'd also like whipped cream on top. Now I'm certain you're gonna forget that, so you'd better write it down ok." Irritated, he says, "I don't need to write it down woman! I can remember that! Cake with strawberries! And whipped cream!" He then grumbles into the kitchen. After about 30 minutes the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment and says, "Where's my toast?

Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things.

Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a check-up, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember ..
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. 'Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?' he asks.
'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?'
'Sure.'
'Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' she asks.
'No, I can remember it.'
'Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so as not to forget it?'
He says, 'I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.'
'I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?' she asks.
Irritated, he says, 'I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!'
Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment.
'Where's my toast?'

A penguin is driving to his mother in law's house when....

His car overheats. He pulls into a garage and the mechanic says he'll need about an hour to figure out what's wrong.
"but there's a small mall just across the street, maybe grab a coffee or something. "
The penguin heads to the mall to do just that. He walks up to the barista and orders.
" I'll have a superhuge hot chocolate with extra whip, hold the hot chocolate. " as you probably know penguins are lovers of whipped cream.
The penguin goes back over to the garage, where he hopes the mechanic knows what's wrong. He walks in, asks what's wrong, and the mechanic tells him" you blew a seal."
Embarrassed, the penguin quickly wipes his mouth saying, "no, no! It's just the whipped cream!"

An elderly couple see a doctor about how to deal with their short term memory loss.

The doctor says to help them remember certain things they should write it down on a piece of paper. One night the couple is watching TV, when the husband starts walking to the kitchen. His wife asks "Can you bring me some strawberries?"
"Sure."
"Aren't you going to write it down so you don't forget?"
"No no. It's fine."
"Well I also want some whip cream. You should write it down so you'll remember."
"Don't worry. I've got it."
"I also want some chocolate syrup on top. You *really* should write it down, dear."
"I got it. Strawberries, whip cream, and chocolate syrup."
The wife sighs as her husband disappears into the kitchen.
After 15 minutes the husband finally comes back carrying a plate of eggs, bacon, and sausage. The wife looks up at him and asks "Where's my toast?"

Baking Cakes

A mother and her young daughter were walking through the park one day when they came across 2 dogs having s**.... The daughter asks her mom, "what are they doing?" the mom not wanting to explain s**... to her young daughter just says "oh they're making cakes"
Further on they come across 2 rabbits having s**..., again the daughter asks her mum what they are doing and again the mum goes "oh they're just making cakes."
further on the daughter says, "you and daddy were making cakes on the sofa last night weren't you?" the mom, horrified, asks "did you see us?" and the daughter replies "no, but I licked the whipped cream off the sofa afterwards"

I'm opening up a snack shop in DC.

I'm opening up a snack shop in DC. We will serve things like:
Triple fudge brownie sunday with double whipped cream, only 100 calories!
Cheesy deep fried nachos, more vitamins and less fat than a salad!
I'll call my shop "Alternative Snacts".

What is a s**... master's favorite dessert?

Whipped cream.