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Whip Jokes

61 whip jokes and hilarious whip puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about whip that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Make your day a laugh a minute with these hilarious whip jokes! From miracle whip to cool whip, and walnut to skimpy, surprise your friends with zingers of all sizes. Read on to get your daily dose of whip humor.

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Funniest Whip Short Jokes

Short whip jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The whip humour may include short whack jokes also.

  1. I was angry at my friend and he sarcastically asked "what would Jesus do?" So I flipped over the table and chased him from the building with a whip.
  2. My farmer friend told me that horse manure is excellent for strawberries. I said, You may be right, but I still prefer whipped cream.
  3. I'm kinda new to gardening... Someone suggested I put horse manure on my strawberries.
    Well, I'm never doing that again...
    I'll just stick to whipped cream.
  4. Why did the accordion player become a chef? He knew how to whip up a great melody and mix it with harmony.
  5. I was pulled over by the police today, so I whipped out my nine millimetre... After they stopped laughing, they arrested me for indecent exposure.
  6. I was having a look... In my mothers bedroom the other day and I found a whip, a mask and handcuffs in her wardrobe. I couldn't believe it... My mothers a superhero!!!!!
  7. Did you hear about the woman who ordered a double entendre at the bar? The bartender reached under the bar whipped it out and gave it to her
  8. I was wondering if anyone would be willing to support a petition to modernize the name of the Pope Mobile. I think we should call it the Miracle Whip. It's got more of a tangy zip to it.
  9. A joke from Civil War History Class today Teacher asks: 'The southern plantations were very wealthy. Exactly how much of that wealth did the slaves get?'
    Student answers: 'A whip'
  10. I saw a whip under my grandparent's bed, I asked my grandpa what it was for He said, "beats me"

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Whip One Liners

Which whip one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with whip? I can suggest the ones about whim and whisk.

  1. To all the philosophy majors out there... Can I get a Grande Mocha with whip please?
  2. Rihanna says that whips and chains excite her... I wonder if her ancestors felt the same
  3. Here I thought 3.5 would never impress a girl but then I whipped out my credit card.
  4. Why was the cook arrested? He was beating the eggs and whipping the cream.
  5. Which superhero loves to whip out his junk in public? The Flash
  6. Why are chefs the meanest? Because they beat the eggs and whip the cream
  7. When are cooks at their meanest? When they mercilessly beat the eggs and whip the cream!
  8. What do you call a white guy in an abusive relationship? Whipped cream.
  9. If you let Jesus take the wheel... Does that count as ghost riding the whip?
  10. Why don't people like the Congressional whip? He always votes nay-nay
  11. I like my cream like I like my slaves. Whipped.
    *I'm so sorry*
  12. What is a southern aristocratic families favourite dance move? The whip
  13. My parents used to be beat me so hard I thought the crack of a whip was my name.
  14. Does Indiana Jones like foreplay? No, he just whips it out.
  15. That chef must be sadistic. He's always beating eggs and whipping cream.

Miracle Whip Jokes

Here is a list of funny miracle whip jokes and even better miracle whip puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • The Bible says Jesus used a whip to drive out the money lenders... I wonder if they called it his "Miracle Whip"?
  • What do you call it when a 90 year old man masturbates successfully? Miracle whip.
  • What do you call it when you tie a brick to a jar of Miracle Whip and throw it into the ocean? "Sink-o de Mayo"
  • I prayed to God to help me get a new car, and I woke up to a giant dollop of mayonnaise in my driveway. I guess he gave me a Miracle Whip.
  • There is an overseer called Miracle working on my plantation. Miracle whips.
  • What did Jesus want when he appeared on a piece of toast? Miracle whip.
  • What do you call the v**... Mary in a s**... dungeon? Miracle whip.
  • What is a m**...'s favorite condiment? miracle whip

Cool Whip Jokes

Here is a list of funny cool whip jokes and even better cool whip puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did the whip cream say to Indiana Jones? Cool Whip
  • How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank low fat non whip frapp before it was cool.
  • What do you call Stewie Griffins fancy car? a Cool Whip
Whip joke, What do you call Stewie Griffins fancy car?

Whip joke, What do you call Stewie Griffins fancy car?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about whip can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of whip puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Laughter Whip Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity

What funny jokes about whip you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean spank jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make whip prank.

A jewel thief entered a house mid-afternoon. He t**... the woman and at knife-point asked the man to hand over the jewelry and money. The man started sobbing and said, You can take anything you want. You can even p**... whip me, but please untie the rope and free her.

Thief: You must really love your wife!
Man: No, but she will be home shortly .

A guy visits his favorite d**...

He puts his money on the bedside table and says I've been bad, mistress. I need to be punished.
She makes him s**... and bend over as she whips his quivering bottom.
Next she makes him crawl into bed and ties him securely to the bedposts.
She runs her whip over his flesh and, as he wriggles in anticipation, the bed posts break and his arms come free.
Don't worry, I can fix this he says, as he runs out to his car. He returns in a few minutes with some tools and gets to work.
In a few minutes the bedposts are fixed.
He looks admiringly at his handiwork and beams.
Good as new, mistress!
She says This sub really loves reposts.

I blow, but I don't s**.... I whip, but don't do chains. Some watch me and feel proud, while others feel ashamed. What am I?

I am a flag.

A woman is talking to her next door neighbour and she says I'm worried about my 16 year old son...

I looked in his school bag and found a gimp mask, n**... c**... and a whip. What should I do.
And the neighbour replyed I'm no expert but I wouldn't s**... him.

A new study found

A new study found
that people who take their coffee black are more likely to exhibit psychopathic traits..
And people who order a quad shot, non-fat, vanilla soy, extra foam, light whip with caramel drizzle are more likely to be their victims..

A guy walks into a bar

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "I was snooping around in my wife's dresser drawers while she was gone over the weekend on a 'business trip' and you won't believe what I found. A whip, a mask and handcuffs! Do you know what this means???" he exclaims to the bartender. "My wife is a super hero!"

Recently my girlfriend has got into equestrian b**...

Last evening she asked me to watch her whip, then watch her nay nay

Ancient Roman galley

The whip guy gets up next to the drum guy and addresses the galley slaves.
"I have good news and I have bad news."
"The good news is all you guys get extra bread this morning."
"The bad news is this afternoon the Captain wants to go water skiing."

Whiplash is so annoying

It's a real pain in the neck.

I have the work ethic of an ox -

If you tie a yoke to my shoulders and whip me until I move, I'm probably going to get a lot done.

The Whip was especially popular

In the 1800's

Great things come in small packages

Is what i say everytime before i whip it out.

Life is hard for k**... black people. w**... used to chain them up and whip them...

For free. Now it costs $200 an hour.

So a lady with Parkinson's orders a grande decaf peppermint soy latte no whip

and I forgot to put the lid on.

What is extreme sadomasochism?

Draw a whip on the wall and throw your wife against it...

What sound does a noodle make, when used as a whip?

"SPAGHET!"

I used my rosary as a whip today...

Call me Indiana Joan of Arc

I saw the Pope at a football match..

I heard he plays as well and he can whip in a good cross.

On a plane, left or right around a vertical axis (often controlled by a rudder) is known as yaw.

But the only axis I'm on when I whip this little sky pony around the golden winds are YEEEEEEET

Whip joke, I prayed to God to help me get a new car, and I woke up to a giant dollop of mayonnaise in my drivew

jokes about whip

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these whip jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.