Happy Whee Jokes for a Lighthearted Night with Friends
What has four wheels and flys?
A garbage truck.
Wheel of Nostradamus
A man was at the fair when he heard a carnie shouting "Step right up and spin the Wheel of Nostradamus and win a prize!" Intrigued, the man approached and asked how much for one spin.
"Only five dollars per spin, sir."
Outraged, the man asked why it was so expensive. The carnie replied:
"I'm trying to turn a prophet here!"
What's it like to be in a wheelchair?
Well, it's no walk in the park.
My friend's in a wheelchair and he acts like he's the toughest guy around.
He can talk the talk, but...
There's a new wheelchair party forming
But it doesn't really stand for anything.
(At least it'll always have a spokes person)
I came across a turtle in the forest...
The turtle was making its way slowly down a forest path with something clinging to its back. Curious, I crept closer. Astride the turtle was a snail. And as I listened, the snail gripped the turtle's armored back and yelled, "Whee!!"
I used to be in a wheelchair....
But I kept getting pushed around.
I thought this joke up at work where we deal with wheelchairs and thought I'd share.
Wheelchairs
A perfect gift for that "special" someone.
What has four wheels and can't support a family?
A liberal arts major.
I lied about the wheels.
Wheelchair tax
The new tax on wheelchairs has been met with major resistance, with some users refusing to stand for it.
Wheelchair athletes have just been banned from the Paralympics
They tested positive for WD40
You can explore whee yep reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean whee whew dad jokes. There are also whee puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
What did the wheel say to the car after the long drive?
I tire of you.
Why can't wheels concentrate?
Because they're always tired.
With a wheelchair, everyday is Halloween!
Children are scared of you, adults try to guess what you are, and the elderly just give you candy!
Paraphrased from the wonderful Zach Anner
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
I'm sorry.
What do you do when your bicycle's wheels wear out?
You retire it.
What has four wheels and flies?
A homeless cripple
Wheelchairs should have pedals on them
So if you get tired of using your arms you can pedal
What has 4 wheels and flies?
A garbage truck
...I'll see myself out.
There's this wheelchair bound kid that gets bullied alot.
It's really sad cause he can't seem to stand up for himself.
Wheel of Fortune
Me: I'd like to buy a vowel
Pat: Aren't you a millennial?
Me: *sigh* I'd like to rent a vowel
If you don't like 18 wheelers
Does that mean you're anti-semi?
I used to own a wheelbarrow full of four-leaf clovers...
...but then I realized I really shouldn't push my luck.
Why are the wheels of the trains made with iron and not rubber?
Because if they were made with rubber, they would erase the line.
When my car's wheel had a blowout...
... I knew it was time to retire it.
Wheel wheel wheel
If it isn't the tricycle.
What has 8 wheels and flies?
A dump truck
What has 10 wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
What does it mean when you have wheels and a country girl wants you?
It means you *a tractor*
What has wheels and flies, but is not an airplane?
A garbage truck
Being in a wheelchair and trying to get ready in the mirror in the worst.
I cant stand to look at myself.
Why are wheelchair users fans of Liverpool FC?
Because they'll never walk alone.
How do wheelchair users communicate at long distances?
Not with walkie talkies
The wheels on Tabasco
Round & round.
What did the wheelchair-bound software developer say when asked to speak at an Apple Keynote?
"Sorry, but I don't do stand-up comedy."
Just because someone is in a wheelchair
Just because someone is in a wheelchair doesn't mean they'll let you push them around.
How does a wheel work?
Tirelessly.
Why are there no wheel chair characters in battle royal games?
Because it's last person standing wins.
What has more than three wheels and flies ?
Garbage trucks
Wheelchair gang rise up!!!
Oh...wait.
My wheelchair bound girlfriend broke up with me.
I think it was because she couldn't stand me.
What's got 4 wheels and flies
A garbage truck
What does 4 wheel drive and a high intellect have in common?
They both allow you to get stuck where others can't pull you out.
The Wheelbarrow
A guy comes home and tells his wife "Honey I'd like to try a new s**... position." She asks "What's it called?" He replies "It's called the wheelbarrow. Do you remember when you we were kids and we would walk each other around on your hands like a wheelbarrow?She says "Okay but I'll try it only under two conditions. One if my back starts to hurt we'll stop right away. And two I don't want to go by my mom's house."
What's got four wheels, no wings, and flies?
A rubbish truck.
Third wheeling with a toxic couple s**....
Btw.. I'm with my parents right now..
My wheelchair bound grandpa is in the nursing home.
I went to visit him for the first time. As we're discussing the local baseball team, he starts slowly leaning to the right in his chair. A nurse come running over and straightens him back up.
As the topic turns to football, he slowly starts leaning to the left. The same nurse rushes over to straighten him up again.
As she walked away, I asked:
Me: So gramps, how do you like living here so far?
A tear starts running down his face as he gets this wistful look in his eyes.
Grandpa: it's not too bad. I just wish they would let me f**....
Third wheeling a really toxic couple is hard
Anyway, I'm out with my parents
What has four wheel and flies.
I learned this joke as a child and it's the only joke I can remember. Have you heard this one before?
A Garbage Truck
You know what they say about about wheelchairs
People can't stand being in them
Wheel Chair bound congressman Madison Cawthorn lost his primary tonight.
Now it's not just his doctors telling him that he can no longer run.
What has four wheels and flies?
Garbage Truck.
.
.
.
To be honest, just listened to Tig Notaro telling this one on Conan O´Brien's podcast.
What has wheels and flies but it isn't an aircraft?
A Garbage truck
