Whack Jokes
53 whack jokes and hilarious whack puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about whack that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Whack Short Jokes
Short whack jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The whack humour may include short whip jokes also.
- What's the difference between a useless golfer and a useless skydiver? The home golfer goes WHACK! "Oh no!" Whereas with the skydiver it's vice versa
- I realized that whacking off helps me fall asleep much faster This whole time the cure for insomnia was within my grasp
- What's the difference between a Golf player and skydiver? One goes:
*Whack*, "Darn!"
While the other goes:
"Darn!", *Whack*
PS: Not sure if this was posted before, but i think it's still funny. - What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver? A golfer goes *whack* "Darn" And a skydiver goes "darn" *whack*
- What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A bad golfer goes whack, dang. A bad skydiver goes dang, whack.
- As soon as the Zombie Apocalypse hits I'm grabbing a sledgehammer and heading down to the local cemetery for the greatest game of Whack-A-Mole ever.
- 70% of men whack off in the shower. The rest of them sing. You know what they sing? ...No, I didn't think you did.
- What do you call it when someone hits avocados repeatedly with a hammer? Gu-whack-a-mole-e.
- Last night was horrible, my wife suddenly died so I had to whack off to a Victoria's Secret catalog. Edit (spelling): wifi
- A man was killed in a rice field by a small porcelain doll.... It was the very first knick-knack, patty whack
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Whack One Liners
Which whack one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with whack? I can suggest the ones about spank and smack.
- What's the Mafias favorite game? whack a mole
- What's a mobsters favorite game? Whack a Mole
- What game are the mafia best at? Whack-A-Mole
- What did the abusive mallard say to his duck wife? Whack, whack, whack, whack, whack.
- What does Ralph Macchio do before he whacks off? Wax on.
- I have to come clean... So I just whack off in the shower.
- Somebody whacked my head with a telescope today I was seeing stars
- What does Mr. Miyagi do during his alone time? Whacks on, whacks off.
- Quality control at a Whack-a-Mole factory ...Is either hit or miss
- What's a German's favorite game? Whack a pole
- I can fall asleep really fast after I whack off It's really come in handy
- Being single is Whack Whack
Whack
Whack
Whack
Whack
Whack
Whack
Whack
Whack
Whack - Why did the abused boy not want to visit Madame Tussauds? Because it was full of whacks.
- whats the Mexican version of whack a mole? gua-ca-mole
- What do you call someone who hates cheesy rap verses? Whack-flows intolerant
Witty Whack Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about whack you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean being whipped jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make whack pranks.
Did you hear that a mob boss was killed...
Did you hear that a mob boss was killed in a rice field by assailants wielding small figurines?
Police are saying it's the first recorded instance of a knick knack patty whack.
A hitman was caught by the police one day.
After a long interrogation he confessed that he was hired beat to a man to death in a rice field and he did it using 2 small porcelain figures. Police say that this was the first case in town of a knick knack p**... whack.
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller.
He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.
"Miss Whack", he says, "I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday".
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger. He says that his dad is m**... Jagger, and it's okay for him to take out all of the money because he is friends with the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
The frog says "Sure, have this", and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink, and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patty tells him that she'll have to consult with the bank manager. She then disappears into the back office.
She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral". She holds up the tiny elephant pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"
The bank manager looks back at her and says "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan, his old man's a Rolling Stone".
Have you read the news?
I was reading the news the other day and came across a story from Vietnam. There were two gentlemen working in a rice p**... when one became enraged at the other and bludgeoned him to death with a small ceramic figurine. Reports indicate that this is the first ever case of knick-knack p**... whack.
Kermit Jagger walks into a bank
and walks up to the teller, Patricia Whack and asks for a loan. The teller asks for something as collateral. Kermit produces a tiny porcelain elephant. The teller doesn't understand so Kermit asks to see the manager. The manager comes out and looks at Kermit and the tiny porcelain elephant. Patricia asks the manager what to do with the elephant? Manager says "it's a knick-knack p**... Whack, give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone!"
Roosters
A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car in a cloud of feathers.
Shaken, the man pulled over at the farmhouse and rang the doorbell. A farmer appeared.
The man somewhat nervously said, I think I killed your rooster, please allow me to replace him.
Suit yourself, the farmer replied, the hens are round the back.
If Dr. Seuss were a convict (poem)
What's this in my hand?
Behind your back?
It's soap on a a rope!
Whack whack whack!
What's this in my sock?
Tick tock, knock knock.
A large steel lock!
Chock chock chock!
What's this in my breeches?
I heard that you blab..
Snitches get stitches!
Stab stab stab!!
A mobster killed an Irishman with a porcelain doll
He was accused of knick-knack p**... whack
Did you hear about the man who was hit over the head with a bobble-head in a rice field?
It's the first reported case of a knick knack p**... whack.
When an Irishman is so drunk that his vision is out of whack...
...he is said to be doublin' Ireland
Vandals arrested for m**... in a field using porcelain miniatures
Detectives report it was the first case of a nick back p**... whack
A hitman beats a cow to death in a ricefield using two small porcelain figures.
Police admit this is the first known case of a knick-knack p**... whack.
A man was arrested for killing a cow in a rice field using only 2 small porcelain figures.
Police say this may be the first known case of a Knick-knack p**... whack.
State troopers arrested an alleged assassin accused of bludgeoning a man to death with two small porcelain figurine in a rice field—
Police admit this may be the first known case of a knick-knack p**... whack.
An assassin was apprehended for murdering a farmer's cow with the trinkets he had stolen from the farmer's wife's china cabinet.
It was the first recorded case of a knick knack p**... whack.
My friend Nick is known as the grill master amongst us, but his ground burgers are undeniably the best.
He's got a real Nick knack patty whack!
Convicted hit man Jimmy "Two Shoes" McClarty.
Confessed today that he was once hired to beat a cow to death in a rice field using on two small porcelain figures. Police admit this may be the first know case of a knick knack p**... whack.
Cr
A Mafia hit-man was arrested for killing a man in a rice field with a porcelain figurine
The police said this is the first known case of a knick knack p**... whack.
Two Married Unicorns are Lying in Bed
The husband Unicorn, without looking up from his newspaper, says big storm's a brewin . The wife Unicorn then replies, well then I'm glad we didn't go on that cruise with your whack job friend Noah!
Irish Man Murdered
Did you hear about the Irishman killed with a garden gnome? It was a Knick knack p**... whack.
Once a man in the mafia, was tasked with killing another man.
He ended up killing him with a porcelain doll in a rice p**....
It was the first known case of a knick knack p**... whack.
A young man decided it was time to come out to his family.
He was worried most about his grandmother, so he approached her in the kitchen.
"Grandma, I, uh, have to tell you something."
"Yes, sweety?"
"I, uh, I'm gay."
"Gay?" His heart stopped. "Does that mean you put men's things in your mouth?"
"Grandma!!!!"
"Well??"
Mortified, he muttered sheepishly, "I, uh, yeah?"
Whack! The wooden spoon found its mark. "Don't you EVER," she sternly replied, "complain about my cooking again."
