Wetting The Bed Jokes
33 wetting the bed jokes and hilarious wetting the bed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about wetting the bed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Wetting The Bed Short Jokes
Short wetting the bed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The wetting the bed humour may include short peeing the bed jokes also.
- Have you heard about the old geography teacher who kept wetting his bed? His only weakness was in continents.
- I suspect my daughter has been wetting the bed and keeping it a secret She's innocent until ruined quilty
- Ronald's wife wets the bed every day since their first wedding anniversary. This information has been leaked.
- Did you know every member of the band Wham had a bed-wetting problem? They couldn't wake up before they would go-go.
- Can you guys help me? I told my 4 year old if he stops wetting the bed, I'll buy him a cool toy and it worked... What kind of toys are 16 year olds into?
- Two ADV riders camping out in a tent. One of them crawls out to pee before bed. Comes back all wet. The other rider asks if it's rainy outside. "No - it's windy!"
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Wetting The Bed One Liners
Which wetting the bed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with wetting the bed? I can suggest the ones about laying in bed and beds.
- What does a toddler and a gardener have in common? They both wet the bed.
- Chuck Norris Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.
- How many medals do you win for wetting the bed? You Win 8
- Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child.
The bed went itself out of fear. - How did a mom figure out her daughter had hit puberty? She kept wetting the bed.
- What did the dad say after his kid wet the bed? Oh, boy, u**... trouble.
- h**... do you know if a snowman has been sleeping in your bed? You wake up wet.
- What's bad about wetting your bed? u**... it.
- What did the mom tell the kid who wet the bed? u**... trouble.
Wetting The Bed Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about wetting the bed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean lying in bed jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make wetting the bed pranks.
Polish, Ukrainian and Russian babies get mixed up in the hospital
Now, parents are trying to figure out which baby belongs to which parent.
ukrainian decides to go first and yells "Slava Ukraini!"
One baby immediately jumps up and pulls into the attention position.
Ukrainian knows that's their baby and picks it up.
Polish takes the second baby and Russian looks completely confused.
"How did you know the second baby is yours?" asks the Russian.
"The one who smiled when Ukrainian yelled is mine" Polish answered, "but the one who wetted the nursing bed, is yours."
A guy is laying in bed reading a book while his wife is sleeping...
Every so often he reaches over and tickles her funny spot. Eventually she wakes up and yells at him saying, "What are you doing, I told you I wasn't in the mood tonight!"
He responds back with, "I understand and respected your wishes".
Irritated she asks, "Then why do you keep touching me?"
and he retorts, "I was just wetting my fingers so I could turn the page..."
Three guys were camping together
And they all had to share a tent, sleeping side by side.
They go to bed, and when they wake up, one of the guys said, I had the weirdest thing happen last night. I had my first w**... since I was a teenager.
Shocked, another one of the campers spoke up. You know what? I also had a w**... last night.
The last guy chimes in and says, you guys are lucky. In my dream, I was an Olympic skier.
Frank and Ben are talking…
Frank: "Hey, Ben, can you keep a secret?"
Ben: "Of course! I'm great at keeping secrets!"
Frank: "Great! So, I—"
Ben: "Why, I used to wet the bed until I was twelve, but I never told anyone!"
This guy went to play poker with his buddies
After a while, it started pouring outside, thunderstorm and what not. The guy, who walked there, asked his friend - how will I get home now? His friend's wife tells him it's not a problem, he should just spend the night there and go straight to work the next day. The friend and his wife get ready to go to bed and then they can't find the guy anywhere. After about 20 minutes there's a knock on the door. They open the door and the guy is there, soaking wet and shivering. As they looked at him, wondering, he says: "what, I had to go home to get my pajamas!"
3 buddies go on a ski trip
After a long 18 hour drive, they get to mountain and they are exhusted. So they quickly rent a cabin and rush in to get to bed. When they get inside they realize that there is only one bed, and quickly agree to share it because they just want to sleep.
When they woke up they all felt refreshed and the guy on the far right said, "I just had the best w**... ever, I was with this hot blonde that would just not stop. "
The guy on the far left, to his surprise said, "wow, I also had a w**..., I saw the girl of my dreams and we were going at it too!"
The guy in the centre confused said, "you guys are lucky, all i dreamt of was skiing and for some reason my hands are sticky"
Not-so lil Johnny anymore
Tired of Johnny's bed wetting, his mommy comes up with a way she could teach him to do it right by himself and so, she calls on Johnny, tells him the following set of steps to follow the next time he would pee. She told Johnny to shout the number out loud so that she could hear him from behind the door.
And the steps go like this
1 - Open the flier
2 - Hold it out and aim for the centre
3 - Pull the skin backwards and give it a gentle shake and pull it back forwards
4 - Put it back in the sack and close the flier
And within just a few weeks, she was happy that it was working quite well as she could hear johnny read the numbers out loud 1,2,3 and 4 until one fine day, when all she could hear Johnny say was
1,2,3,3,3,3,3,3,3,3,3,3.......
Three drunks sitting at a bar
Three drunks sitting at a bar discussing who was the most drunk the previous day.
1st drunk says "I was so drunk last night i went home and blew chunks".
The 2nd drunk says "that's nothing! I was so drunk last night I drove home and crashed into a tree, kicked my front door down and woke up in the garden!".
3rd drunk says "that's nothing! I was so drunk last night I stole a police car drove it into my house, threw the TV out of the window and wet the bed!".
The 1st drunk says "I don't think you understood me, Chunks is my dog.".
There was an old married couple who love each other very much.
But each morning as he was waking up the husband let out a huge n**... wet f**... with his wife right in the bed next to him.
The wife always says "One day you're going to f**... your guts out if you don't stop."
Then one day the wife snapped she won't take it anymore and she got up extra early when downstairs and got the guts out of a turkey and put it in the bed behind.
She went back downstairs to wait and then she heard the loud disgusting f**... all the way down the stairs and then she hears nothing for a long while.
Just as she's about to go upstairs and check on her husband he comes stomping down the steps and he says "Honey you were right after I get my guts out but with the grace of God and these two fingers I managed to shove them back up there again."