Wet Floor Jokes
46 wet floor jokes and hilarious wet floor puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about wet floor that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Wet Floor Short Jokes
Short wet floor jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The wet floor humour may include short wooden floor jokes also.
- I'm sick of tired of people soaking my floor with their wet umbrellas when they come over to visit. I think it's time to make a stand.
- What did Janis Joplin say when somebody stole her wet floor sign? Take it. Take another little piso mojado, baby.
- Got kicked out of Barnes and Noble for moving the "Caution Wet Floor" sign to the Fifty Shades of Gray aisle.
- I was mopping and my boss asked why the floors were all covered in water "Just gettin' her wet first. You know, a little floor-play"
- There was a tornado, so I tossed a 'Wet Floor' sign out the front door. Talk about throwing caution to the wind!
- So, putting a "caution wet floor" sign down before delivering my best pick up line is frowned upon....
- A cop tells his sergeant, "Wow, a woman shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped" "Oh, so you have arrested her then?" The sergeant asked.
"No, not yet. The floor is still wet." - Q: Why did the blonde pee on the ground?
A: Because she saw a sign that said 'Wet Floor.' - A man is busted by his boss while having s**... with a "Wet Floor" sign... He got off with a warning.
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Wet Floor One Liners
Which wet floor one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with wet floor? I can suggest the ones about laugh floor and wet dry.
- Today I learned that "Wet Floor" signs… …are not a request…
- Was kicked out of Walmart today. When I walked in I saw a "Wet Floor" sign. So I did.
- Why is the bathroom floor always wet on the Starkiller base. Stormtroopers always miss.
- I tripped on a "slippery when wet" sign today. I was floored by the irony.
- I like my women like I like my water Wet and slippery on the floor.
- Yo' Mama is so s**..., she saw a "Wet Floor" sign and did what it said.
Wet Floor Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about wet floor you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean floor jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make wet floor pranks.
Old Mrs. Watkins awoke one spring morning to find that the river had flooded the entire first floor of her house.
Looking out of her window, she saw that the water was still rising.
Two men passing by on a rowboat shouted up an invitation to row to safety with them.
"No, thank you," Mrs. Watkins replied. "The Lord will provide."
The men shrugged and rowed on.
By evening, the water level forced Mrs. Watkins to climb on top of the roof for safety.
She was spotted by a man in a motorboat, who offered to pick her up.
"Don’t trouble yourself," she told him. "The Lord will provide."
Pretty soon, Mrs. Watkins had to seek refuge atop the chimney.
When a Red Cross cutter came by on patrol, she waved it on, shouting, "The Lord will provide."
So the boat left, the water rose and the old woman drowned.
Dripping wet and thoroughly annoyed, she came through the pearly gates and demande d to speak to God.
"What happened?" she cried.
"For cryin’ out loud, lady," God said, "I sent three boats!"
2 beat cops call the crime branch on phone
Hello! Crime branch?
Yes.
This is sergeant John. We have a case here. A woman has shot her husband for stepping on the floor she had just mopped clean.
Have you arrested the woman?
No Sir! The floor is still wet!
A cop calls up the station
Cop: "This is officer John. We have a h**... case here. A woman just shot her husband for stepping on the floor she had just mopped clean."
HQ: "Have you arrested the woman?"
Cop: "No sir, the floor is still wet."
A cops calls for backup from a crime scene
This is officer John, please send backup, a woman has shot her husband for stepping on the floor she had just mopped clean.
Have you arrested the woman?
No Sir, the floor is still wet.
Two policemen . . .
Two policemen call the station on their radio.
"Hello. ..... Is this the Sarge?"
"Yes?"
"We have a case here, Sarge. A woman has shot her husband
dead for stepping on the floor she had mopped."
"Have you arrested the woman?"
"No sir. The floor is still wet."
A police officer called his station on the radio.
"I have an interesting case here. An elderly woman shot her husband for stepping on the kitchen floor she just mopped."
Dispatch replied, "have you arrested the woman yet?"
The officer responded, "Not yet. The floor is still wet."
An old lady shot her husband on the foot ...
An old lady shot her husband in the foot for stepping on the floor right after she mopped.
An officer reached on the scene and radioed into the station.
Station: "Has the women been arrested ? "
Officer: "No, the floor is still wet ...."
A woman shot her husband.
A woman shot her husband for walking on her freshly mopped floor.
When the police arrived at the house the sergeant contacted one of the officers over the radio:
"Have you arrested her yet?" The sergeant asked.
"Not yet" replied the officer, "the floor's still wet"
An old lady shot her husband for stepping on floor she just mopped
A police officer called the station on his radio, "I have an interesting case here. An old lady shot her husband for stepping on floor she just mopped".
Operator, "Did you arrest the woman?"
Officer, "No. The floor is still wet."
A woman is taking a shower when she hears a knock at the door...
She throws on a towel and goes to answer it. Outside is her next door neighbor, taken aback by her near-n**.... He says, "wow, I never realized how beautiful you were under all of that clothing! I'll pay you $800 right now to drop that towel!" Dripping wet, the woman scans the hallway. With no one in sight and nothing to lose, the woman promptly drops her towel to the floor and shows her neighbor her full n**... body. Grinning a toothy grin, her neighbor takes out his wallet and hands over eight $100 dollar bills. After she closes the door, her husband calls to her from the living room, "honey, who was that?" "Oh, just our next door neighbor" she replies. Her husband responds, "did he give you the 800 bucks he owes me?"
A Woman Shoots Her Husband For Stepping On The Clean Floor…
A Woman Shoots Her Husband For Stepping On The Clean Floor…
A police officer jumps into his squad car and calls the station.
I have an interesting case here, he says. A woman shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped.
Have you arrested her? asks the sergeant.
No, not yet. The floor's still wet.
A police officer jumps into his squad car and calls the station...
"I have an interesting case here," he said. "A woman just shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped."
"Have you arrested her?" asks the sergeant,
"No, not yet. The floors still wet."
Two cops contacts with h**... via radio:
- Send in a team ... - What is situation? - The m**..., the victim is a man, 38 years old, his mother struck him with a knife several times for entering on the wet, just cleaned floor. - Did you arrest her? - No, the floor still wet.
A police officer called his station back on Radio.
He was at a m**... scene where an old woman shot her husband for stepping on just mopped floor.
Dispatch: So was an Arrest made ?
Officer: Not yet.
Dispatch: ?
Officer: The floor is still wet.
A woman is cleaning her bathroom...
...and slips. She does the splits and suctioned herself to the floor.
She calls her husband.
"I'm kinda stuck to the floor...".
He tries to lift her, but can't do it. So he calls a plumber.
They both tried to pull her up, to no avail.
So he says "I'm sorry, but I think we'll have to break the tiles to get her free, and the hospital should do the rest.".
Then the husband says "Hey, we could f**... her instead.".
The plumber, flabbergasted, says "Why?".
"If we get her wet enough, we can slide her over to the kitchen. The tiles there were only $30 per square foot.".
The policemen were talking over the radio:
- Mr. Sargeant, we arrived at the crime location
*- What's the situation over there?* - asked the sargeant over the radio
- A woman just killed its husband. He was stabbed 35 times, shot twice, asphixiated, decapitated and then burned.
*- And what was the reason for such an atrocious crime? *- Asked the sargeant
- He stepped right on the wet floor which she had just cleaned.
*- And did you capture the woman?*
- No sire, we are still waiting for the floor to dry!
Police officer calls his sergeant
Police Officer: Hey Sgt. We are at a m**... scene where wife stabbed her husband 10 times because he walked into the kitchen while she was mopping.
Sgt: Is suspect in custody!
Police Officer: No sir, the floor is still wet!!
2 police officers were called to a domestic a**...,
2 police officers were called to a domestic a**... call. when they got there they had to call for backup. 2 police cars showed up making it 6 officers at the scene,
they called headquarters and spoke to their Captain.
"Captain we have a m**... here"
"what happened?"
"a wife shot and killed her husband for walking on her still wet mopped kitchen floor"
"well, have you arrested her yet?"
"Not yet, the kitchen floor is still wet."
-Officer Johnson here...
\-*Officer, go ahead.*
\-We responded to a call about a woman who stabbed his husband 38 times after he walked in on the floor still wet. We're at the location.
\-*Copy, Officer Johnson. Have you arrested the woman yet?*
\-Negative, we're waiting for the floor to dry.
Two cops are called to a building.
-Central, we have a h**... here, a man was killed by his wife after he walked on the recently mopped floor
-Have you made an arrest?
-No! the floor's still wet!
A police officer was dispatched to the house of an elderly couple when the neighbors heard gunshots
Shortly after arriving the officer called into the station to update the sergeant
Officer: "well sergeant, the old woman shot her husband because he walked through the kitchen while she was mopping the floor."
Sergeant: "did you arrest her?"
Officer: "no sir"
Sergeant: "why not?"
Officer: "the floor is still wet."
Mexican Custodian
A Mexican custodian finishes mopping the lobby floor. A young girl enters the lobby with her eyes glued to her smartphone.
"Miss," the Mexican custodian says, "the floor is wet."
The girl looks up from her phone with a bored expression. "K," she replies.
"Miss," the Mexican custodian repeats, "I said the floor is wet."
A police officer called the station on his radio.
I have an interesting situation here. An old lady shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped."
Have you arrested the woman?
No, the floor's still wet.
A group of police officers are sitting outside a woman's house after she murdered her husband
One calls dispatch and says "we got a woman armed with a knife in here and she just killed her husband."
Dispatch says "do you know why she killed her husband?"
The officer replies "yeah, she told him not to step on the floor right after she mopped, and he stepped on it anyway"
Dispatch asks "well do you have her in custody yet?"
"No not yet" the officer says
Dispatch says "Why not?"
The officer hesitates for a moment, then finally replies "well the floor still looks wet"
A Woman Shoots Her Husband For Stepping On The Clean Floor...
A police officer jumps into his squad car and calls the station. I have an interesting case here, he says. A woman shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped. Have you arrested her? asks the sergeant. No, not yet. The floor's still wet.