Well Endowed Jokes

Following is our collection of funnies and chistes working better than reddit. They include Well Endowed puns, dirty or clean gags suitable for kids, that are actually fun like the best witze.

The Best jokes about Well Endowed

I met this european guy last night who claimed he was a well endowed white supremacist

Well, he said he was a hung aryan

Pittsburgh

There were three priests in a railroad station, all wanting to go home to Pittsburgh.

Behind the ticket counter was a very, very shapely lass, well endowed, gorgeous, amazing woman.

The priests were all embarrassed and in new territory, so they drew straws to determine who would get the tickets.

The first priest approached the window. "Young lady," he began, "I would like three pickets to titsburg." Whereupon he completely lost his composure and fled.

The second priest approached. "Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh," he began, "and I would like the change in nipples and dimes." So, of course, he also fled.

Then came the third. "Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh, and I would like the change in nickels and dimes. And
I must say," he continued, "if you insist on dressing like that when you get to the pearly gates, St. Finger's going to shake his peter at you."

The ladder to success

One day, Harry came upon a big, long ladder that stretched into the clouds. He'd walked this way every day and this ladder was never there before.

Curious and brave, he began to climb. Eventually, he climbed into the layer of clouds, and saw this rather large, homely woman lying there on a cloud.

She spoke, "Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" Harry figured success had to be better than this, so he continued climbing. He came upon another level of clouds, and found a thinner, cuter woman than before.

She also spoke, "Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" Harry saw that his luck was changing and so continued his climb. On another level of clouds, he found a rather attractive woman with not so bad of a figure.

She stated, "Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" Harry really liked his advantage now! He climbed quickly and deftly, and sure enough, on the next level, he found a gorgeous, lithe, well-endowed woman lying seductively on the cloud.

"Take me now or climb the ladder to success," she huskily whispered. Harry couldn't believe his eyes, but his greed caught the best of him. He climbed to the next level, expecting Aphrodite or similar.

Suddenly, the ladder ends, and a latch closes behind him. He looks over to see a 400-pound, 6'8" hairy biker looking guy with tattoos. The biker gets up and walks menacingly toward Harry.

Apprehensively, Harry whispers, "Who are you?"

The biker answers, "I'm Cess".

A day at the races

Two female teachers took a group of pupils from years 1, 2 and 3 for a field trip to Epsom Racecourse. When it was time to take the children to the 'bathroom', it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.



The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's toilet when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal. Having no choice, she went inside, helped the little boys with their pants, and began hoisting them up one by one, holding on to their 'willies' to direct the flow away from their clothes and shake them dry.



As she lifted one boy up, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring at his equipment the teacher said, 'You must be in year 3?



'No ma'am', he replied. 'I'm riding Atlantic Jewell in the next race, but I really appreciate your help.

High Urinals

High Urinals
A group of 3rd, 4th, and 5th graders, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to the local racetrack, (Churchill Downs) to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry (Bourbon) - but mostly to see the horses.

When it was time to take the children to the bathroom, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other. The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's room when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinals.

Having no choice, she went inside, helped the boys with their pants, and began hoisting the little boys up one by one, helping them to hold on to their 'wee-wees' to direct the flow away from their clothes.

As she lifted one, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring, the teacher said, 'You must be in the 5th grade.' 'No, ma'am', he replied. 'I'm riding Silver Arrow in the seventh race, but I appreciate your help.'

What do you call it when two well endowed astrophysicists have a gay sword fight?

A Large Hardon Collider.

A Guy/Gal walks into a bar with an Ostrich/Race-horse

A good-looking young man (or woman) and an ostrich (or racehorse) walk into a bar. The two sit down, order some nachos and wind up drinking a few beers by the end of the night. When it comes time to pay the tab, the (wo)man reaches into his/her pocket and dumps a slightly-crumpled mess of bills and change onto the bar.

"That should cover it." (s)he says. As the (wo)man walks away, the bartender counts it out and to her surprise, it's the exact total of the bill. Looking back up, she sees that the (wo)man has returned. (S)He once again reaches into his/her pocket and pulls out exactly 20% of the bill before tax.

"There ya go, sorry about that." (s)he says.

The bartender asks, "Mind if I ask you about the exact change and the ostrich(horse)?

"You see," (s)he says, "A long time ago, I was an archaeologist. While in arabia, I discovered a magical lamp with a genie inside who granted me 3 wishes. The first, obviously, was for eternal youth and fitness. Second, unlimited wealth- any time I buy something, I just reach into my pocket and pull out the exact amount of money. The third, well, the third wish was for a tall, youthful, long-legged(well-endowed) chick(stud) who would always stick by my side and share my interests."

A lady went into a bar in Waco and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table.

He had the biggest boots she'd ever seen.
The woman asked the cowboy if it's true that men with big feet are well endowed.

The cowboy grinned and said, "Shore is, little lady. Why don't you come on out to the bunkhouse and let me prove it to you?"

The woman was a bit promiscuous and was curious to see if the old adage was correct, so she spent the night with him.

The next morning she handed him a $100 bill.
Blushing, he said, "Well, thank you, ma'am. Ah'm real flattered. Ain't nobody ever paid me fer mah services before."

"Don't be flattered. Take the money and buy yourself some smaller boots"

A lady went into a bar and saw a man with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest boots she'd ever seen.

The woman asked the man if it's true what they say about men with big feet are well endowed. The man grinned and said, "Sure is, little lady. Why don't you come on out to the bunkhouse and let me prove it to you"...?
The woman wanted to find out for herself, so she spent the night with him.
The next morning she handed him a £100. Blushing, he said, "Well, thanks, miss I'm really flattered. Ain't nobody ever paid me fer mah services before".....
She said, "Don't be flattered take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit".....!!!

What do you call a jerking off well-endowed midget?

A huge short coming.

I was reminiscing about the time I dated this well-endowed girl...

Man, talk about great mammaries.

What do you call a group of well-endowed, homosexual physicists?

Large hardon colliders

What do you call a well-endowed Asian man?

Hung Lo

What do you call a blond-haired, blue-eyed guy who is well-endowed?

A Hung-Ariyan.

What do you call a well-endowed member of Hitler's master race?

Hungaryan.

A group of 2nd, 3rd and 4th graders, accompanied by 2 female teachers, went on a field trip to the local race track to learn about thoroughbred horses and the sporting industry, but mostly to see the horses.

When it was time to take the children to the toilet, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.

The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the gents when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal.

Having no choice, she went inside, helped the boys with their trousers, and began lifting the little boys up one by one, and held onto their 'pp' to direct the flow away from their clothes.

As she lifted one, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring, the teacher said, 'You must be in the 4th.'

'No, ma'am,' he replied, 'I'm in the 7th, riding Silver Arrow, but thanks for the lift.'

What do you call a jury of well-endowed gentlemen?

A hung jury.

If a well endowed woman works at Hooters, where does a guy with an amputated leg work?

IHOP

What do you call an endowed puppet?









Well strung.

My girlfriend cheated on me with a well-endowed guy.

I forgave her and took her back because I wanted to be the bigger man.

A man from Hungary is fighting a well-endowed German

It's a Hungarian vs. a Hung-Aryan

My nude studies class

has a new male model called William Wallace. He is really well endowed. While sketching him I was just in awe of it ! So, I invited him to come home with me last night.



Basically just like his historical namesake, William Wallace was hung, drawn and quartered.

What did the well-endowed monkey say to his friends?

I'm thrilled with macaque

What do you get when you cross a well endowed lady and a circus performer?

A Juggler.

What do you call a well endowed midget who packages sub prime loans for mortgages

A big short

What do you call 5 well endowed women at an event?

A-ten-d's.

A kilted Scotsman

was walking down a country path after finishing off a large amount of whisky at a local pub. He felt quite sleepy and decided to nap against a tree.

As he slept, two female tourists heard his loud snoring. When they found him, one said, "I've always wondered what a Scotsman wears under his kilt."

She boldly walked over to the sleeper, raised his kilt, and saw that he wore nothing at all. Her friend said, "Well, the mystery is solved! Let's thank him for sharing!" She took off her pretty blue hair ribbon and gently tied it around the Scotsman's endowment.

A while later, the Scotsman was awakened by the call of nature. He raised his kilt and was bewildered at the sight of the neatly tied blue ribbon. He stared for a minute, then said, "I don't know where y'been laddie... but it's nice ta see you won firrrst prrrize!"

A well-endowed man walks into a bar

The bartender yells, "I can't hear you from there!"

Why did the wife of the illiterate well-endowed man want a divorce?

TL;DR.

What do you call a group of twelve, angry, well-endowed men?

A hung jury.

Which of the disciples were well-endowed?

Judas - He was hung.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends.

Joko Jokes