Weightlifting Jokes
9 weightlifting jokes and hilarious weightlifting puns to laugh out loud. Read sport jokes about weightlifting that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh-out-loud at the best weightlifting jokes and funny stories from the Olympic weightlifting world. From competitive muscle-building to everyday CrossFit, these jokes are sure to make any lifter smile.
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Weightlifting Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What is a good weightlifting joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
I feel really bad for the Mexican Olympian disqualified from weightlifting for excessive use of protein.
They told him, "No whey, José."
What's the difference between a really strong weightlifter and a really, really, really strong weightlifter?
Repetitions.
A prisoner called Andrea wants to prove her strength...
So she starts a weightlifting competition and wins! Turns out the powerhouse of the cell is the might of con 'Drea.
An old, blind cowboy wanders into a bar....
An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter,
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a, very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler
"Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, "No... Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
A blind man walks into a bar
After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender,
Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?
The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet. In a husky, deep voice,the woman next to him says,
Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde and I'm a 6′ tall, 200 pound blonde with a black belt in karate. What's more, the fella sitting next to me is blonde and he's a weightlifter. The woman to your right is a blonde, and she's a pro wrestler. Think about it seriously, mister. You still wanna tell that blonde joke?
The blind guy says, Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.
A man walks into a gym
He walks up to the owner and says, Hey! What are all these lines for?
The owner replies, Oh, these are the lines to the different activities
That's the kick line, that's the weightlifting line, that's the squat line, that's the-
The owner paused, looking worried.
The mans says, what's wrong?
The owner slowly looks at him and yells, We forgot the punchline!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
They say weightlifting can lead to disembowelment ..
But I think it really shows guts
What is a weightlifter on a cut the day after an intense workout?
a sore loser
LPT: When weightlifting, always have a friend videotape it.
Because the camera always adds 10 pounds.
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