Web Jokes
171 web jokes and hilarious web puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about web that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Get ready to laugh out loud with this collection of funny jokes about the web! From dark web puns to puns about the world wide web, spider webs, and webpages - there's a joke for everyone. Laugh your way through this compilation of puns about the web, from homepage folder gags to Spiderman web puns.
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Funniest Web Short Jokes
Short web jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The web humour may include short folder jokes also.
- My girlfriend told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. We went and had some drinks. Cool guy. Wants to be a web developer.
- My daughter wants a pet spider for her birthday I went to the pet store, and the owner said "that'll be $200 please", I said "$200?, it'll be cheaper getting one off the web".
- If Wonder Woman and spiderman went into business together would they call it Amazon Web Services?
- What do Spiderman and I have in common? We both end up with sticky hands after using the web.
- You guys heard about this new Spiderman restaurant? Don't bother bringing cash. All the orders are web only.
- Add a word to ruin a movie: - Batman Begins College
- The Longest Yard sale
- Charlottes Web Cam. - I get anxious whenever I have to use the default Microsoft web browser Using Firefox helps take the *Edge* off.
- Today I pitched a new web software to Apple to replace safari... it raised a few iBrowse :(
- A Web Designer decided to use right aligned text His boss yelled at him for it, because it wasn't justified.
- The recruiter was shocked to see the applicant was a spider. Wait, what position are you applying for? A web designer, the spider replied
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Web One Liners
Which web one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with web? I can suggest the ones about spider and internet.
- EMINEM: his palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy WEB MD: Cancer.
- What was Spider Man's major in college? Web Design.
- All you need in life is 1 good friend To delete your web browsing history after you die
- Man is like spider... ..bound to have sticky fingers after being on the web
- What's the worst thing you can come across while searching the web? Your keyboard.
- What does Spiderman do when he's not fighting crime? Web Development.
- Spiders must be... the only web developers who like bugs.
- The most common type of web developers are not even human they are spiders
- Why did the spider start playing the accordion? To weave beautiful melodies into its web.
- What do spiders do for a job? Web development
- Spiderman: Just another guy who ends up with sticky hands after using the web.
- I was in a band called Dark Web. We was always on tor.
- You hear about the spider who needed a job? He was experienced in web development.
- How do spiders make good computer technicians? They are always on the Web.
- Why did Peter Parker get fired? He spent all day on the web.
Spider Web Jokes
Here is a list of funny spider web jokes and even better spider web puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Struck up a conversation with a spider today at home while dusting. Nice guy. He's a web designer
- What does a spider want to be when he grows up? (This is really good guys...brace yourselves..........)
A web designer. - What is the most common job among spiders? Web designer.
- What do you call a graduated spider? A Web Designer
- Why did the spider never go to school Because she learnt everything on the web.
b^a^d^a^b^u^m - What would you call if spiderman starts jumping around buildings instead of swinging using his spider webs? Peter Parkour
- Who called it Spider-Man trilogy and not.. A web series.
- Where do criminal spiders hang out? The deep web
- Why did the male spider spin a web? So he could catch all the fly ladies.
- So Spider-Man and Silver Surfer decided to hang out one day Yeah, I think they surfed the web together
Web Developer Jokes
Here is a list of funny web developer jokes and even better web developer puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you call a web developer who enjoys finding bugs in the system? A spider
- Why do spiders usually get jobs in tech? Most of them are already competent web developers.
- There's an emo in my Web Development class, she's doing a website about jewellery Her first page was /Wrists
- I met Spider-Man in college He was in Web development.
- What's Spider-Man's favourite class? Web development.
- Why do the Avengers keep calling Spiderman over to fix their computer? Because they heard he's a web developer
- What's a Web Developer's favourite tea? URL #DDD
- All web developers hate finding bugs in their work. Except spiders
- What type of web developer likes finding bugs Spiders
- What do white girls and web developers have in common? nobody ever compliments our back end
:(
Web Designer Jokes
Here is a list of funny web designer jokes and even better web designer puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What is Spiderman's perfect job? A web designer.
^^^^^sorry! - What kind of career would a spider excel in? Web design
Hehehe - Why did the spider go to college? To get his degree in web design!
- What's Spiderman's favorite hobby? Web designer
- What did the Spider choose to work as? Web designer
- Guys, we should start respecting spiders at least a little I mean they are great at web design
- What did the spider go to college for? Web design
- Had to fire the web designer from my Allergy Eye Drop business today... ...everything he designed was a site for sore eyes.
- I have designed web site for crippled children There isn't a back button
- Spider-Mans' New Job What new job did Spidey get when he was fired?
Web designer.
Web Browser Jokes
Here is a list of funny web browser jokes and even better web browser puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I've been learning to use a new web browser lately, but my teacher is being really harsh to me. He's my Tor-mentor.
- How did Rey exit out of her glitching web browser? Force quit.
- Why couldn't Super Mario surf the web? Because Browser wouldn't let him.
- Internet explorer is the best web browser For when you need to download Chrome and Firefox.
- There must be flat-earthers at Microsoft. Or why would one call a browser for the worldwide web Edge?
- Why can't orphans use any web browsers effectively? Because they can't access any of the homepages.
- What's a Warboy's from Mad Max's favourite web browser? Chrome
- What did one web browser say to another during a fight? Cache me outside, how bout dat.
- Zelda is a web browser Because Link appears in it.
- Internet Explorer Chrome and Firefox are popular web browsers.
Internet Explorer is the most popular web browser to install Chrome or Firefox with.
Dark Web Jokes
Here is a list of funny dark web jokes and even better dark web puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- A doctor is selling his victims on the dark web. He shows up to the location and no one is there. The doctor waits for hours. When the buyer shows up... They say "Thank you for your patients"
- I know this guy who teaches people how to access the Dark Web, but if they're incompetent then he physically and psychologically abuses them He's a Tor mentor.
- What do you call it when a blind person goes on the internet? The Dark Web.
- What do you call skid marks on Spider-Man underwear? The Dark Web
- I hired a guy to teach me all about the dark web. He was just a tormentor.
- Where do spiders buy drugs? The dark web.
- What do you call a turtle that surfs the dark web? A TORtoise
- Do you want to watch the movie "Venom", about Spider-Man's archenemy, before it hits theaters? Easy! You just have to navigate the dark web...
- what is the place from which they bought the black spider-man in the movie 'Spider man into the spider verse The dark web
- I went and tried to buy a toaster on the Dark Web One of them was called the "Bath Bomb."
Silly Web Jokes for a Good Time with Friends
What funny jokes about web you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dark web jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make web pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
why don't spiders go to school..
Because they learn everything on web.
:(
i know i s**... at jokes.
I saw your "a woman walks into a store joke" and this is mine
A woman walks into a pet store and sees three parrots. She asks the cashier how much is the first parrot and he says, "This parrot costs $500".
"$500? Why is it so expensive?"
"This parrot can dance, sing, say 300 words and can send emails over the web"
"really? wow! and how much for the second one?"
"$2000!"
"$2000?"
"Yes, that parrot can dance, sing, say 1500 words, send emails, browse the web, use twitter and type texts you dictate on a computer"
"Wow, fantastic and what about the third one?"
"The third one costs $200,000".
"$200,000 ???? What does he do to cost that much?"
"absolute nothing."
"Nothing? and why does it costs $200,000"
"because the other two parrots call him boss".
When I worked as Tech Support for an ISP I had a woman call outraged that we allowed "filth" on her computer...
After she calmed down slightly she explained that her 10 year old Granddaughter was sleeping over and they were having a "Spa Night" and did a web search on "Facials". . . .I was able to hit the mute button in time to avoid making matters far worse... True Story!
For all you web developers out there.
Why couldn't the div buy a drink?
It lacked id.
Why couldn't the div find a girlfriend?
It lacked class.
Why wasn't the div good at diplomacy?
Its position was absolute.
Why was the div an anarchist?
It had no borders.
Why couldn't the div play poker?
It had 0 opacity.
Why couldn't Marco Rubio register on a web forum?
The website required him to prove that he is not a robot.
Jokes/Puns!
1. What kind of birds always stick together? VEL CROWS.
2. What is a spider's favorite thing to do? SURF THE WEB.
3. What goes around the cow but never moves? THE FENCE.
4. Why didn't cheddar cheese want to hang out with bleu cheese? BECAUSE HE HAD A MOLDY PERSONALITY.
5. Why do fish swim in schools? BECAUSE THEY CANT WALK IN SCHOOLS.
6. How do you catch a unique rabbit? YOU NIQUE UP ON IT.
I don't get what the big deal is with spiders. Why is everyone so scared of them?
I got to know the spider living in the corner of my room. We talked about our dreams and goals, he wants to be a Web designer.
A spider got sick from eating a fly he trapped...
his mother told him not to trust everything he finds on the web
Jesus and Satan are having a contest
They want to see who is the best programmer.
So the first challenge is screens. It's a tie.
Then Assembly. Tie again.
Web Design. Tie again.
Challenge after challenge nobody is winning. So after like five days the power fails. So they wait for it to come back on. Then when the power come back on Jesus is the clear winner.
Because Jesus saves.
What does Spider-Man do after he gets hurt?
He checks Web MD
Have you seen the film about an onion that turns into a spider?
It's called Shallot's Web
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My grandpa isn't very computer savvy
So my Grandpa (72) got on the internet only recently and is still very unsure about how to use it. A month or so ago I taught him how to use email, to his amazement.
I also showed him how web browsing works and showed him how to put questions into Google search.
Yesterday he was planning to repaint the shed and wanted to know if latex paint would stick to stucco, so he did a search for Latex b**....
What do the World Wide Web and the Prime Minister of Israel have in common?
They are both Net and Yahoo.
Passionate kiss is like spider web
leads to undoing of fly.
My doctor's name is Peter Parker
But I just call him Web MD
If you hear, "Oh, what a tangled web we weave"
There's usually a looming problem.
Why are spiders so unproductive?
Because they hang out on the web all day!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Global Facts About s**...
At any given moment:
FACT: 79,000,000 people are having s**... (i.e. right now);
FACT: 58,000,000 are kissing;
FACT: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having s**...;
FACT: A few less fortunate are reading emails & web postings;
You hang in there!
I took a class about spiders
thanks to the pandemic, it was on the web
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This joke about Covid circulating around Chinese web boards...
If someone walking ahead of you farts and you can can hear it, that means you're not practicing correct social distancing.
If you can smell it, that means you're not wearing your mask properly.
If you are wearing your mask properly and can still smell it, then congratulations, you don't have covid-19.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I just created a web site for English girls who got a sunburn at the n**... beach.
It's called Redtit.
How do spiders find their food?
On the web
How do spiders figure out what they're having for dinner
They search the web
I got ripped off buying a tarantula from the pet shop
Should have just got one off the web
Did you know all the web addresses are piled together in Russia?
They're callrd the Url mountains
I would assume spiders adapted pretty quickly to online learning.
After all, they were already comfortable on the web.
Let's play name the title
Jokes are reposted so many times here, so name the titles of these punchlines
1. Ones a hippo and ones a little lighter
2. How far do you think I can kick this bucket?
3. Obviously not
4. But it wasn't stroganoff
5. Sam sung note 7
6. Measles
7. We went out and had a few drinks. Cool guy, wanted to become a web designer.
8. I wore the wrong sock this morning
9. Unless everyone gets them
10. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for life.
Fun Fact: Spiders can tell the difference between someone blowing on their web and the wind.
But that may just be because the wind isn't warm and sticky...
Did you hear that Virginia's Governor and First Lady actually met on a dating web site?
It was called OKKKCupid.
