Wearing Jokes
171 wearing jokes and hilarious wearing puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about wearing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you ever feel like your outfit is conveying a joke? From wearing condoms to glasses, masks to black, shorts to red, protection to camo, find out what your clothing choices say about you and how to wear the most stylish apparel. Get your fashion on with leather, denim, and statement pieces. Upgrade your wardrobe with suggestions from this article on "Wearing Jokes."
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Funniest Wearing Short Jokes
Short wearing jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The wearing humour may include short wears jokes also.
- If any of you here are thinking of getting married, consider the following before you do. On the one hand, you get to wear a pretty cool ring.
On the other hand, you don't. - Give a man a shirt, and he'll wear it once Tell a man he looks good in it, and he'll wear it for a lifetime
- Why does Batman only wear dark colors? Easy. Batman doesn't want to get shot. Why does Robin only wear bright colors? Easy.
Batman doesn't want to get shot. - In 50 years: "You know, kids, back in my day, we had to wear masks everywhere we went at one point." We didn't have those fancy hazmat suit you all wear today
- I dont believe in hitting my children as punishment So i send them to school wearing crocs and anime shirts and let other kids beat them instead
- How do you tell the difference between a fully vaccinated person and an unvaccinated person if they aren't wearing a mask? Ask them who won the election.
- What's the difference between the Taliban and Texas? The Taliban requires women to wear masks
- Today I learned that if you're in a canoe and it flips over in the water.... .....you can safely wear it on your head....because it's capsized.
- I met two guys wearing matching clothing. So I asked them if they were gay. They promptly arrested me
- Surveys show that 80% of women who wear yoga pants never do yoga … And 100% of men don't care.
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Wearing One Liners
Which wearing one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with wearing? I can suggest the ones about wore and worn.
- I saw 2 guys wearing matching outfits and asked if they were gay. They arrested me.
- What Size underwear Do Feminists Wear? #Double Standard.
- What does a programmer wear? Whatever is in the dress code.
- Why did the mermaid wear seashells? Because she grew out of b shells
- Your mom is so ugly... That the world faked a pandemic just so she has to wear a mask
- Who wears a red suit and knows if you were naughty or nice? The Spanish Inquisition.
- Why did the mermaid wear seashells? She grew outta her beeshells!!!
- What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals? Phillipe Phillope
- Why does Waldo only wear striped shirts? He doesn't want to be spotted
- Why does Waldo wear stripes? He doesn't want to be spotted
- What do you call a French guy wearing sandals? Philippe Philoppe
- Why does Ariel wear seashells? Because she can't fit into D shells
- Why does Aeriel always wear Sea Shells? Because D shells were too big
- Why do Scottish men wear kilts? Because the sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.
- What kind of sunglasses does Ned Flanders wear? Oakley Dokelys
Wearing Mask Jokes
Here is a list of funny wearing mask jokes and even better wearing mask puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Lol plague inc easy mode is so unrealistic Like who wouldn't wash their hands and wear a mask during a global pandemic.
- Just been in to Starbucks and the barista was wearing a face mask I asked "Why are you wearing a surgical mask?"
She said "I'm not, it's a coughy filter." - COVID is bringing everyone a little closer to being Batman Either you are wearing a mask or your parents are dead.
- Coughy Filter Joke The barista at Starbucks was wearing a face mask.
Me: Why are you wearing a surgical mask?
She said: I'm not, it's a coughy filter. - PSA do not wear a washington wizards face mask. CDC studies have shown they provide no defense
- There is a law that says you don't have to wear a mask It's called Natural Selection
- WARNING!! They said you only have to wear masks and gloves to go grocery shopping but they LIED! Apparently you have to wear clothes too.
- I noticed a barista working alone in a small shop was still wearing a mask. She said, "this is a coughy filter"
- Your momma so ugly Governments across the world conspired to spread a pandemic to get her to wear a mask.
- I have 100% solid proof that masks don't work! My wife went on a business trip and on the plane they made her wear a mask -- and now she has chlamydia!
Wearing Glasses Jokes
Here is a list of funny wearing glasses jokes and even better wearing glasses puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I told a girl, "you look great without glasses" She said, "but I don't wear glasses."
I replied, while polishing my lenses, "yeah, but I do." - The other day I told a girl, "You look great without glasses." Girl: "I don't wear glasses."
Me, while polishing my lenses: "No, but I do." - What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spectator.
- I told my wife she was prettier when she didn't wear glasses She said "So are you"
- Why do a lot of math nerds wear glasses? It helps with division.
- Why do java coders wear glasses? Because they don't C#
- Why do JavaScripters wear glasses? Because they don't C#
- "Honey, I don't like how you look with these new glasses." "But I don't wear glasses.."
"I know, but I do." - A cop looked at my driver's license and said I should be wearing glasses, so I told him I had contacts. But he didn't care who I knew and he gave me a ticket anyway.
- Why was the cell phone wearing glasses? He had lost his contacts!
Wearing Condoms Jokes
Here is a list of funny wearing condoms jokes and even better wearing condoms puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I wear camouflage condoms So they can't see me coming
- What do masks and condoms have in common? It's safe to come inside if you're wearing one
- Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears? So she wouldn't get hearing aids.
- Wear camouflage condoms Never let em see you coming
- "Hey honey, my olympic condoms arrived.." "Hey honey, my olympic condoms arrived, I think I'll wear gold."
"Maybe you should wear silver and come second for a change!" - Condoms aren't 100% safe. My buddy was wearing one when he got hit by a bus.
- I don't think condoms are 100% safe My friend was wearing one and he got hit by a bus!
- My girlfriend said that once we get married I can stop wearing condoms!! Guess you don't need an umbrella if it's never gonna rain...
- I'm so selfish.... I wear ribbed condoms inside out.
- I dumped my blonde girlfriend after she tried to poke holes in one of the condoms. She might have gotten away with it had I not been wearing it at the time.
Wearing Black Jokes
Here is a list of funny wearing black jokes and even better wearing black puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why do police officers wear blue? Because the black uniforms led to too much friendly fire.
- Why do Nuns always wear Black & White? No particular reason, it's just a habit they have.
- A child asks: "Mom, why do women wear white on their wedding day?" Mom: Well, they wear white because it's the happiest day of their life.
Child: Then why does the man wear black? - Black Guy in Nike The other day I saw a black guy in Nikes running down the street with a TV.
I thought to myself "hey is that mine?"
And then I remembered that mine wears Adidas - I saw a black guy running down the street And he was carrying a TV. For a second I thought, *"hey, that looks like mine!"* but then I realized mine wears Adidas.
- How many religious people wear black hoods? Nun
- Why do black men wear baggy trousers? Because their knee grows.
- I got an invitation to a black-tie-only wedding But when i showed up everyone were wearing tuxedos
- Knock, knock! Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Fornication.
Fornication who?
Fornication like this you should wear a black tie. - kids at wedding kid: Mom, why does the bride wear white clothes?
mother: because it is the happiest day in her life.
kid: So, why the groom is wearing black?
Wearing Condom Jokes
Here is a list of funny wearing condom jokes and even better wearing condom puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Condoms cannot be considered safe A friend of mine was wearing one and got hit by a car.
- Why does Mia Khalifa only make black men wear condoms? She wants a dad for her kids
- Why did the Irishman wear two condoms? To be sure, to be sure.
- I have a friend who wears condoms while he masturbates... I told him I'm fairly certain that you can't get her pregnant from across the room in her closet.
- Condoms are supposed to provide protection But my friend was wearing one and he suffocated.
- My girlfriend tried to poke holes in one of my condoms with a needle. Which I wouldn't have been too angry about, had I not been wearing it at the time.
- Condoms aren't as safe as they make them out to be... My friend was wearing one when he got hit by a truck. He's not doing too well...
- What do you call a guy who wears two condoms? Justin Case
- I don't wear condoms.... they irritate my sores.
- Warning, Condoms aren't totally safe. A friend of mine was wearing one and he got hit by a bus.
Happy Wearing Jokes for a Lighthearted Night with Friends
What funny jokes about wearing you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean clothing jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make wearing pranks.
TIFU by accidentally cheating on my wife at a b**... convention with a woman who was wearing the same leather mask
Whoops, wrong sub
Did you hear Mary Poppins stopped wearing lipstick whilst giving head?
Apparently the super colour fragile lipstick makes the d**... atrocious.
A guy sits down on a bench next to a Thai kid wearing soccer cleats.
"So, who are you rooting for in the World Cup Final?" the man asks, noticing the soccer gear.
"I don't know, who's playing?" the boy answers.
"Jesus Christ, have you been under a rock or something?"
My best friend got mad at me because he caught me sniffing his sister's p**...
It didn't help that she was still wearing them.
Or that his whole family was there.
That made the rest of his sister's f**... kind of awkward.
And who thought you could make the f**... for such a small child more awkward than it already was..
So..the wife and I were in town shopping....
..and as we came out of a store, three girls aged between 18 and 20 walked by, wearing tiny cropped tops and short short skirts. One of them, a tall blonde, had really fantastic, long, toned and tanned legs.
I gently nudged my wife and said "I bet you wish you still had legs like that!".
She got really upset with me..in fact I could still hear her sobbing as I wheeled her up the ramp into the next store.
Why do prostitutes love wearing underwear
Because it keeps their ankles warm
An older man walks into a bar...
...wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard. He sits down at a bar and orders a drink. As the bartender sets it down, he asks, "Going to a party?"
"Yeah, a costume party," the man answers, "I'm supposed to come dressed as my love life."
"But you look like Abe Lincoln," protests the bartender.
"That's right. My last four scores were seven years ago."
New Earring
John is at work one day when he notices that his
co-worker, Zach, is wearing an earring.
This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion".
"Hey Zach" he yells out "I didn't know you were into earrings."
"Don't make such a big deal out of it, ..it's only an
earring." Says Zach sheepishly.
"No really," probes John, "How long have you been wearing one?"
... "Ever since my wife found it in our bed."
A mugger
Late one night, a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs.
"Give me your money," he demanded.
Indignant, the affluent man replied, "You can't do this, I'm a United States Congressman!"
"In that case," replied the mugger, "give me MY money."
A little girl is attending her first wedding...
And as the priest is reading the vows, she leans over to her mother and whispers, "Why is the bride dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness," her mother explains, "and today is the happiest day in her life."
The child ponders this for a moment and then asks, "So why is the groom wearing black?"
Why couldn't anyone hear Hellen Keller scream?
She was wearing mittens.
2 potatoes standing on the side of the road. How can you tell which one is the h**...?
The one wearing the sack that reads IDAHO
Today I saw a little boy wearing rags sitting on a curb
I said, "Awww, are you an orphan"?
He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents."
I saw a guy today with soot all over his face carrying a large pick axe and wearing a royal blue hardhat that matched his overalls.
But these are just miner details.
I was walking around town the other day...
I was walking around town the other day when I saw these two j**...-offs wearing matching outfits, I mean, down to the *belt* same outfits, so I yelled to over to them "Hey faggots did you plan that?"
Anyways, they arrested me.
My boss, who is a fit woman, caught me in the shower room after work.
She said to me "Would you mind taking my blouse off?"
I replied, "Certainly," and took it off.
Then she turned around and said, "Would you take my skirt off too?" So I removed that as well.
Then she finally asked me to take her underwear off, so I did that too.
Then she looked at me and said, "If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired"
Why did Paul Walker cross the road?
Because he wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
Pavlov's birds
An MIT student spent an entire summer going to the Harvard football field every day wearing a black and white striped shirt, walking up and down the field for ten or fifteen minutes throwing birdseed all over the field, blowing a whistle and then walking off the field. At the end of the summer, it came time for the first Harvard home football team, the referee walked onto the field and blew the whistle, and the game had to be delayed for a half hour to wait for the birds to get off of the field. The guy wrote his thesis on this, and graduated.
So my wife said "take off my shirt".
So I did as she said and took off her shirt.
Then she said, "Take off my skirt." I continued and took off her skirt.
"Take off my shoes." Once again, I did as she said and I took off her shoes.
"Now my hose, bra, and p**...." And lastly, I took them off.
Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again."
When wearing a bikini,women reveal 90% of their body
When wearing a bikini,women reveal 90% of their body....men are so polite they only look at the covered parts
How do you know a homeless woman is menstruating?
If she's only wearing one sock.
(This joke brought to you courtesy the homeless guy outside my local 7-11.)
Three old ladies are sitting on a park bench...
A man wearing a long raincoat approaches, opens it and flashes them.
Two of the ladies immediately have a s**.... The third couldn't reach.
Halloween Joke
This guy goes to a Halloween costume party, but he's just wearing street clothes, and he has his girlfriend sitting on his shoulders.
The host says to him, Dude, this is a Halloween party! You're supposed to be wearing a costume?
The guy replies, I am wearing a costume! I'm a snail!
You're a snail?
Yeah, I'm a snail, says the guy. Then he points to his girlfriend and says, This is Michelle.
My friend was r**... by a teenager mutant ninja turtle.
He wasn't wearing a mask, so we don't know which one did it.
What are the pros and cons of wearing two watches?
On one hand, you have a watch...
But on the other hand, you have a watch.
Why don't Italians do b**...?
Because they can't say the safeword while they're wearing handcuffs.
I got caught sniffing underwear...
I got caught sniffing my friend's sister's underwear the other day,
What made it worse was she was still wearing them,
Made the rest of her f**... really awkward.
There are a mother and child at a wedding.
The child turns to her mother and asks "Mommy, why is the Bride wearing white?" The mother quietly responds "Because, white is seen as the color of happiness, and this is the happiest day of her life!" The child ponders this for a moment, and then turns to her mother again. "Then why is the Groom wearing black?"
It's 80 degrees in San Francisco today.
Girls are wearing skirts so short you can almost see their d**....
I've just noticed the wife is wearing her s**... underwear.
This can only mean one thing.
She's behind with the laundry.
A man wakes up one morning to find that he's grown a thick beard and is wearing a turban....
He, being very concerned and disoriented, calls his boss in order to see if he can get the day off.
Man: "Boss, I just woke up with a turban and a long, thick beard. I think I need a day to figure things out."
Boss: " So what are you saying....?"
Man: "I'm calling in Sikh."
Late one night a mugger wearing a mask !!!
Late one night a mugger wearing a mask stopped a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money," he demanded. Scandalized, the man replied, "You can't do this – I'm a US Congressman!" "Oh! In that case," smiled the robber, "Give me MY money!
I before E
Except when you run a weird heist on a feisty foreign overweight neighbor wearing beige.
What's the difference between a man wearing pajamas on a bicycle and a guy wearing a tuxedo on a unicycle
Attire
Stop spreading the fake news that women are forced to wear hijabs.
It's their free choice between wearing them or getting s**... to death.
I was thinking about buying a blindfold, but decided not to
I just couldn't see myself wearing it
My wife keeps complaining about me wearing socks while we have s**...…
I *suppose* a c**... would be better...
My sister asked me to remove her clothes.
So I took off her shirt.
Then she said, "Take off my skirt."
I took off her skirt."Take off my shoes."
I took off her shoes.
"Now take off my bra and p**...."
and so I took them off.
Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again."
I saw this really fit girl in the nightclub last night and she was wearing a chessboard patterned shirt...
So, I made a move on her.
A young man robbed a bank wearing a suit made of many mirrors
But he turned himself in after taking some time to reflect.
Luckily the judge was lenient as he saw a lot of himself in the young man.
I walked into a bar and saw this girl wearing a Falcons jersey.
I walked up and introduced myself as, "25 point lead".
"Is that your real name?", she asked.
I said, "No, but I figured anyone wearing a Falcons jersey would blow a 25 point lead."
A friend got mad at me for smelling his sister's underwear.
I don't know if it was because she was still wearing them or because the rest of the family was there. Either way it made the rest of the f**... very awkward.
A lady calls her butler into her room and says, "Jeeves, take off my dress"
He casually says, "Yes, Madam", and removes the dress. Then she says, "Jeeves, take off my underwear". Again, he says, "Yes, Madam" and removes the undergarment. She then says, "Jeeves, take off my bra". Again, with no hesitation he says, "Yes, Madam" and removes the bra. Then she says, "Now out of my sight! If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired!"
How does an Indian girl tell her family she will be wearing a Western dress to her wedding?
"Sorry, not Sari."
Boy: I'll pay you 10 bucks to climb up the flagpole.
Boy: I'll pay you 10 bucks to climb up the flagpole.
Girl: ok.(climbs the flagpole)
Girl: Mommy Mommy a boy paid me 10 bucks to climb the flagpole. Mom: He just wanted to see your underwear!
...Next Day...
(Same boy): I'll pay you 20 BUCKS to climb the flagpole!
Girl: OK thanks! (climbs the flagpole)
Girl: Mommy Mommy today the boy paid me 20 BUCKS for climbing the flagpole, but today I tricked him this time I wasn't wearing underwear.
Mom:...
My buddy set me up on a blind date and he said, "I'd better warn you, she's expecting a baby."
I felt like such an idiot sitting in the bar wearing just a diaper...
A woman asked me if I thought she was wearing to much makeup.
I told her it depends on whether or not she was trying to kill Batman.
Wife told her husband
A man's wife comes up to him and tells him, Take off my shirt. So he does.
She then tells him, Take off my skirt and high heels. So he does.
Then she tells him, Take off my bra and underwear. So he does.
Finally she tells him, I better never find you wearing my clothes again.
I can usually tell if I'm going to have s**... with someone by what shoes they are wearing.
Pumps and high heels yes, running shoes no- she will probably get away.
A guy walks into a Muslim bookstore wearing a Make America Great Again hat...
As he was wandering around taking a look, the clerk asked if he could help the man find anything.
Do you have a copy of Donald Trump's book on his U.S. immigration policy regarding Muslims and i**... aliens?
The clerk said, Kiss my a**...… get out… and stay out!
The man said, Yes, that's the one. Do you have it in paperback?
A man goes to a costume party wearing nothing but his underwear and a woman on his back.
His friends see him and say, Hey man, what are you supposed to be?
He replies, Oh, I'm dressed as a turtle.
His friends respond, A turtle? How are you a turtle? Who's that woman on your back?
The man replies, Oh that's just Michelle.
When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body, but I'm so polite...
...I only look at the covered parts.
I've been reading 'Lord Of The Rings' and apparently, Gollum was once a normal man, but wearing the ring drained him of his youth, energy and any joy in life...
Must be the same ring I put on when I got married...
Why did Paul Walker cross the road?
Because he wasn't wearing a seat belt.
Condoms do not guarantee safe s**...
A friend of mine was wearing one when he was stabbed by the woman's husband
A man is lying on a nudist beach wearing only a hat covering his c**...
When all of a sudden a woman passes by who remarks, "If you were even the tiniest bit of a gentleman, you would lift and tip your hat to a lady."
He replies, "If you were even the tiniest bit of a s**... woman, the hat would lift by itself."
A dad is sitting on the couch in his living room
He hears his son start walking down the stairs and then loud b**... and rumbling
Dad: Son what happened?
Son: it's nothing i just dropped my shirt down the stairs
Dad: it sounded a lot heavier than a shirt
Son: yeah it's because i was wearing it
A man was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him. The officer looked in the back of the man's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?
The man replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.
You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.
The next day, the officer saw the same guy driving down the road. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.
I did, the man replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach.
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life."
The child thought about this for a moment, then said, "So why is the groom wearing black?"
A Russian enters a bar full of Turkish people.
He's wearing a t-shirt with bright lettering "Turkish got 3 problems."
Just a few seconds later the Turkishs oppose him and say "Hey, yopu know what you're wearing is insulting?"
The russian responds: "This is your first problem: You're so easily offended."
The Turkish respond: "Okay, maybe we should settle this outside."
The Russian: "That's your second problem: You always want to solve your problems with violence."
The Turkish bring him outside and pull their knives.
The Russian: "And here's your third problem. You always bring knives to gun fights."
b**... are like the sun.
You can stare at em longer if you're wearing sunglasses.
The police chief asked, "Do you have any leads or suspects for the m**... case?" The officer responded, "I'd like to interview the bartender wearing high heels and a leopard print dress." The chief frowned and said...
"Please, just wear your police uniform."
So I took off her shirt. Then she said, "Take off my skirt." I took off her skirt. "Take off my shoes." I took off her shoes. "Now take off my bra and p**...." and so I took them off.
Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again."
A 20 years old girl returned to her home , looking Happy.
'Mom , look I got 10$ ! ' she exclaimed. Surprised , her mother asked ' honey , you had gone to the forest. how did you get this money ?'
' When I was roaming in the forest, a middle-aged man came to me and said that he would give me 10$ if I would climb a tree. '
Shocked, her mother replied ' Oh no dear , you don't understand . You are wearing a skirt and by climbing the tree, he wanted to see your p**....'
The daughter replied ' Don't worry mom , I am very clever . I knew this and so I removed my p**... before climbing the tree.'
Has COVID-19 got you wearing glasses and a mask at the same time?
You may be entitled to condensation.
EDIT (July 14, 2020 7:40PM PST): Um, wow. I did not expect the 2.9K likes, especially since I didn't come up with it. Thanks for the support guys and y'all got me, I read it somewhere else and shared it.
My mate set me up on a blind date.
He said, "She's a lovely girl, but there's something you should know... She's expecting a baby."
I felt like a right idiot waiting in the pub wearing nothing but a n**...!
A man named Jeff was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him.
The officer looked in the back of Jeff's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?
Jeff replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.
You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.
The next day, the officer saw Jeff driving down the road once again. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.
I did, Jeff replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach."
My friend said, That's a nice-a**... shirt you're wearing.
I said, Thanks. They are called pants, not an a**... shirt.
My step-sister walked into my room one day and she says, "Hey, big brother... take off my shirt."
So I took off her shirt.
Then she says, "Take off my skirt..."
So I took off her skirt.
Then she says, "Take off my bra and p**......"
So I took off her bra and p**....
Then she says, "If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, I'm telling mom and dad!"
A Russian dude enters a bar wearing a tshirt saying, "Turks got 3 problems."
Obvious repost
As soon as he enters the bar a bunch of Turks stop him.
Turks: you come in our country and have the b**... to insult us.
Russian : that's your first problem. you guys gets offended so easily.
Turks: Let's get him outside.
Russian: that's your second problem. you wanna solve everything with violence.
*They gets outside of the bar and Turks starts taking their knives out*
Russian: that's your third problem. you bring knives to a gunfight.
Here's a classic jewish joke.
A mother brings her son two new ties as a birthday gift for her adult son. Later, in the evening the two meet for dinner and the son is wearing one of the ties. His mother takes one look at him and says, You didn't like the other tie?
I saw a guy in a wheelchair wearing a camo outfit
I thought, man you can hide but you can't run.
George Carlin once famously joked, "Think of how s**... the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."
Thanks to all those people wearing masks but leaving their noses fully exposed, the stupider half is now a lot easier to spot.
Condoms don't guarantee safe s**... any more.
A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot dead by the woman's husband.
A nun is walking to church.
As she passes her local store, the shopkeeper says, "Wake up on the wrong side of the bed today, Sister?"
She finds it odd, but keeps walking. On her walk, three more people pass her and say, "Wake up on the wrong side of the bed today, Sister?"
Still baffled as she gets to the church, she walks to another nun at the pulpit and asks, "Why does everyone keep asking me if I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today?!"
The other nun looks down and says, "You're wearing the priest's shoes"
