Weakly Jokes
34 weakly jokes and hilarious weakly puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about weakly that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Weakly Short Jokes
Short weakly jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The weakly humour may include short very weak jokes also.
- I've decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because the weights are too heavy. I just handed in my too weak notice.
- I'm kinda scrawny, so I had to quit my job as a personal trainer Yeah, I gave 'em my too weak notice
- Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in the next five years? Me: I'd say my biggest weakness is listening.
- Interviewer: What's your greatest weakness? Me: Answering the semantics of a question but ignoring the pragmatics
Interviewer: Could you give me an example?
Me: Yes I could - Job interviewer: And where would you see yourself in five years' time Mr. Jeffries?" Me: "Personally I believe my biggest weakness is in listening."
- As I looked into her eyes I felt my knees go weak and my stomach turned to butterflies. That's when I realized I'd drugged the wrong glass.
- In an interview I was asked where I see myself in five years I replied with "I'd have to say my greatest weakness is listening."
- Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" Me: "I'd say my biggest weakness is listening"
- A man is in a job interview.. "So it says here that you consider your memory to be one of your greatest strengths?"
"Absolutely."
"Could you give me an example of that?"
"An example of what?" - As I looked into her eyes across the candlelit table, I felt my knees go weak, my heart began to race and my stomach turned to butterflies... That's when I realized I drugged the wrong glass!
Share These Weakly Jokes With Friends
Weakly One Liners
Which weakly one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with weakly? I can suggest the ones about mildly and so weak.
- Does anyone remember the joke I made about the Chiropractor? It was about a weak back.
- Why did eminem kneel at the half time show? His knees were weak, and arms were heavy.
- Remember that joke I told you about the chiropractor? It was about a weak back.
- EMINEM: his palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy WEB MD: Cancer.
- "Fortnite" is a terrible name for a game. It's too weak.
- Not knowing Greek mythology is my biggest weakness It's my achilles horse
- What do you call a weak ape? A chimpansy
- Why should honeymoons only last six days? Because seven days makes a hole weak.
- Do you guys remember the joke I posted about my spine? It was about a weak back.
- "So, what are your qualifications?" "I'd say my biggest weakness is my listening skills"
- Does anybody remember the joke I posted about my spine? It was about a weak back.
- I go to a muscular dystrophy support group. We meet weakly.
- How do churches stay so strong? They pray on the weak.
- I'm a comedian with muscular dystrophy I'll be here all weak
- It was a real pain canceling my gym membership. They made me hand in a too weak notice.
Unearthly Funniest Weakly Jokes to Tickle Your Sides
What funny jokes about weakly you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean poorly jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make weakly pranks.
What are the 3 stages of s**... after marriage?
Tri-weekly
Try Weekly
and
Try Weakly
Male s**... Drive Through The Ages
Between 16 and 32: Tri-weekly
Between 33 and 52: Try weekly
52 and up: Try weakly
An old man is dying..
His grandson asks him, "papa.. What will happen to your body when you die?" the grandfather looks up weakly at him and says, "I decay...". Just then his monitor flat lines and the boy sat wondering why his grandfather didnt know what would happen to his corpse.
Jesus is hanging on the cross.
There's a big loud crowd gathered when he's heard weakly calling for Matthew. Matthew rushes toward the cross but is brutally beaten back by the Roman soldiers guarding it. He runs around to the far side and tries again. Again he's beaten back. Finally after several more attempts a beaten and b**... Matthew makes it to the cross.
Yes lord what do you have to tell me
Jesus replies I can see your house from up here
A girl comes back home after many years to see her father before he dies...
She goes to his bedside and starts crying, "Dad, I'm sorry!"
He looks at her, smiles weakly, and says, "Goodbye, Sorry." He grins. "I'm *dead*."
There are three stages of s**... after marriage:
1. Tri-weekly.
2. Try weekly.
3. Try weakly.
Jake's final conversation
Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside. He looked up and said weakly:
"I have something I must confess."
"There's no need to" his wife replied.
"No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace...I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!"
"I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work."
s**... life cycle of a human male
tri-weekly
try weekly
try weakly
How much s**... do couples have?
Newly weds: "Tri-weekly."
After 10 years: "Try weekly."
After 30 years, "Try, weakly."
Let's make it Aussie joke day.
A man on vacation in Queensland suffers a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. On waking, he weakly asks the nurse, "Was I brought here to die?" The nurse replies, "No, they brought you in yesterday."
s**... through the ages:
Age 20-30: Tri-weekly
Age 30-40: Try weekly
Age 40-50: Try weakly
A pickpocket is a victim of a motorcycle hit-and-run.
A police officer comes to his aid.
"Do you remember his license plate?" he asks.
"No" says the pickpocket weakly, "but here's his wallet."
There are 3 stages to a married couple's s**... life
Tri-weekly
Try weekly
Try weakly
Bill was lying on his death bed
His faithful wife at his side, comforting him. Bill weakly lifts his head and says "Honey, if this is it for me, I don't want you to be alone. You should marry Jake, across the street"
"I can't even think of anything like that right now," she responds. "But, Jake? I thought you hated him."
"I do."
The REAL 3 Stages of Married s**...
Tri-weekly.
Try weekly.
Try weakly.
The three stages of a man's life.
1) tri-weekly
2) try weekly
3) try weakly
Two philosophers are having a discussion about the morality of swords. To back up their claims, one of them picks up a sword and shouts "The tip of this sword could never pierce your leather vest" and proceeds to lunge the sword into their chest
Coughing up blood, the wounded philosopher weakly replies "That's a good point"
What is a woman's s**... frequency during marriage?
It starts out triweekly, then tri-weekly, and eventually try weakly.
