Watermelon Day Jokes
9 watermelon day jokes and hilarious watermelon day puns to laugh out loud. Read holiday jokes about watermelon day that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Watermelon Day Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good watermelon day joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
The warning sign
There was a watermelon plantation which had been constantly spoiled by night thieves who were trespassing to steal melons. The owner came with an idea to repel the intruders: he put a warning sign on the plantation's fence: "Beware! Steal on your own risk! One melon below this fence is poisoned!"
The next day, there were no more missing melons and a short text added on the warning sign: "Now there are two".
There was a farmer who grew watermelons...
He was doing pretty well, but he was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his water melon patch at night and eat his watermelons. After some careful thought, he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure. He made up a sign and posted it in the field. The next day, the kids show up and they saw the sign which read, "Warning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide." The kids ran off, made up their own sign and posted it next to the farmer's sign. When the farmer returned, he surveyed the field. He noticed that no watermelons are missing, but the sign next to his read, "Now there are two!!!"
Hygienic!
Two girls were walking down the sidewalk on a hot summer day. They come upon this old lady sitting on steps in front of her house eating watermelon. They notice that she wasn`t wearing any p**.... So they ask her if its cooler without wearing any p**....
She said, "I don't know if it's cooler but sure keeps the flies off the watermelon.
A farmer kept getting water melons stolen, so one day he puts a sign up that says 'one of these watermelons is poisoned' next day he gets up and goes out to work in his watermelon patch and sees another sign
'now there are two'
A n old farmer grows watermelons
However, every night, a group of kids would sneak into his farm at night and eat some of his produce. One day the farmer gets fed up with this and places down a sign in the field saying "Warning: one of these watermelons has been injected with cyanide". He then waits. Night passes and the farmer excitedly goes out to his field to check the results, only to find another sign posted next to his saying "now there's two of them"
Mr. Smith's Unusual Depression
Doctors were dumbfounded when they couldn't figure out why Mr. Smith was so depressed. They interviewed him about how his day had gone, nothing seemed out of the ordinary, they asked him what he ate and he said he had a watermelon smoothie with broccoli salad for lunch.
Then they realized, he was melonccoli.
Two girls take a walk on a hot summer day.
They see an old lady sitting in front of her house eating watermelon.
They notice she isn't wearing any p**....
"Is it cooler without p**...?" they ask.
She says, "I don't know if it's cooler, but it sure keeps the flies off the watermelon."
The hotel gardener.
The was once a gardener who worked in a hotel. One day, he decides to walk in the garden and he spots a 50 pounds watermelon. He continues his walk in the garden to find a tomato as big as a soccer ball. Finding this very strange, he contacts the hotel's director and he takes an appointment with him for the next day.
Tomorrow comes and he meets the hotel's director. As soon as the director finishes his greetings, the gardener says: "Listen boss, I don't care if the hotel shelters the Olympic Games, but please tell the athletes to stop peeing in the garden!
The best kind watermelon... Disclaimer:This joke was told by my grandmother
A fruit salesman was having a normal day in his fruit shop.
A customer came along and asked for his best watermelon, and the
owner gave him a watermelon.
The customer asked
"Are you sure this is the best watermelon you have?"
"Yes sir" replied the owner, " the finest watermelon I have."
The customer was about to leave with his new, ripe watermelon
when suddenly, a truck went off course from the road and was mere
inches away from the customer and the fruit shop owner. The fright
caused the customer to drop his watermelon, which opened and
revealed that it was actually a p**... white color, not the ruby red
color a regular ripe watermelon has! The customer asked "Hey, I thought
you said that this watermelon was the ripest one you had!"
The fruit shop owner replied "Well yes, it was, until the truck came along.
You can't blame the watermelon for being white after having a near-
death experience!
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