Washroom Jokes
31 washroom jokes and hilarious washroom puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about washroom that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Washroom Short Jokes
Short washroom jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The washroom humour may include short restroom jokes also.
- Why did Captain Kirk take such a long time in the washroom? Because he was fighting the Klingons.
- If you're American when you enter the washroom and Russian when you leave, what are you when you're on the john? ~~European!~~ President Donald Trump
- A woman walks in on the janitor using the women's washroom... "What are you doing in here?"
"The men's room is filthy" - An angry customer yells: Waiter, bring me a cup of joe. Joe the Waiter: *Walks to the washroom* One cup of Joe coming right up!
- Environmentalist Dilemma Biggest dilemma for an environmentalist in Washroom:
'Should I save water or save paper?' - What did Michael Jackson do when he was in the washroom? He pulled down his Billie Jeans whipped out his Thriller and Beat It.
Share These Washroom Jokes With Friends
Washroom One Liners
Which washroom one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with washroom? I can suggest the ones about public restroom and bathroom.
- 8 girls asked me out today The trick is to go into the Woman's Washroom!
- Last chance to use the washroom before I shower! Speak now or forever hold your pees.
- What does a poker player do in the washroom? Do the royal flush
- What did Shakespeare say when he had trouble using the washroom? *To Pee or not to Pee?*
- What did the American say when he saw a Polish man using the washroom? EUROPEAN!
- What do you find in Reese's washroom? Reese's f**...
Fun-Filled Washroom Jokes to Boost Your Mood
What funny jokes about washroom you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean toilet jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make washroom pranks.
New Old House
While carpenters were busy working outside the old house I just bought, I busied myself with indoor cleaning. I had just finished washing the floor when one of the workers came in and asked to use the washroom. I looked at his muddy boots and said "Just wait a second, Ill grab some newspapers"
"That's alright lady," he responded, "I'm already trained."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
They recently removed the u**... from our mens washroom at work...
I really miss that u**.... I mean I missed it once in awhile when it was there... But now I really miss it!
I have a Chinese friend named Cheng.
At an official function, we were having snacks.
I asked him, "Cheng, do you ever get fed up of people saying that all Chinese look the same?"
He replied, "Cheng has gone to the washroom. I am his wife!
A patron in a Montreal restaurant turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded
"This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked 'C' gave me boiling water."
"But, Monsieur, 'C' stands for chaud – French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal."
"Wait a minute," roared the patron. "The other tap is also marked 'C'."
"Of course," said the manager. "It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city."
I went on my very first date today...
...we were enjoying a lovely dinner while talking about our lives, until she excused herself to use the washroom. It's remarkable how women can stay in there for two hours!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Sitting at a bar and a friend leans quite close to me as she get up to go to the washroom. Jees, Bill you smell good. What have you go on?
Actually, I have a hard on but I didn't know you could smell it!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The fastest thing.
Three friends are having a conversation. o**... asks, 'What do you think is the fastest thing ever?'. The first guy responds 'It's the light'. The second guy goes 'It's thought'. The third guy responds 'It's diarrhea'. The first guy is suprised and asks 'Why is diarrhea the fastest?'. The third guy responds 'Because even before I thought about turning the lights on in the washroom, I s**... myself.
Two men meet at a washroom door
Two men meet at a washroom door. What were their nationalities?
One was Russian and the other was Finnish.
What did they say to each other?
European!
Thanks to my high school shop teacher for this one.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Do you know why I hate being in a public washroom?
Because its where all of the d**... hangout.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What does a dad say when demolishing the washroom with thier son?
That will teach you to get bad grades in school.
Little John and his mother were attending church
Suddenly in the middle of mass, John clenched his tummy and looks distressed
Concerned his mother asks him, " What's wrong, son?"
John replies," My tummy really hurts, I think I am going to throw up"
Since the mass was still underway, she turns to him and says , " Ok, You know where the washroom is right? Go there, and when u feel better, come back"
Little John rushes out and soon returns
His mother is perplexed because the washrooms were located on the other side of the church.
"Are you feeling better? Did you use the washroom?"
John replies, "Oh there was no need to go all the way there, there is box outside titled 'For The Sick'"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman pregnant with triplets gets shot
with three bullets to her w**.... Miraculously she and all her children survived. However, a bullet had embedded in each of the three children. The doctor decided it would be best to leave the bullets. A few months later she gives birth to two beautiful daughters and a son, with no health complication.
~~~13 years later ~~~
The mother had decided that it would be best for the children if she never told them about the shooting. One day when one of her daughters was using the washroom she peed out the bullet. She freaked out and ran to her mother, "Mom, mom I was just using the washroom and I peed out a bullet, what is going on?!" And the mom decided it was time to come clean. "I was shot 13 years ago, and a bullet has embedded in you and your brother and sister..." A few days later her other daughter comes running "Mom, mom I was just using the washroom and I peed out a bullet, what is going on?!" and the mother responded "I was shot 13 years ago, and a bullet has embedded in you and your brother and sister..." A few days, not to the mothers surprise her son came running "Mom, mom..." "Wait, let me guess , interrupted the mother, you were using the washroom and you peed out a bullet?" "No, I was jerking off and I shot the dog!"
Old corny joke from my childhood.
Once upon a time there were three brothers.
There names were Shadhap, Traboule and Mannars.
One day Traboule was lost so the two other brothers went to the police.
Then Mannars had to go to the washroom and told his brother to talk to the policeman.
The policeman asked, "What is your name?"
"Shadhap." the remaining brother answered.
The policeman was shocked and replied, "My word! That is quite rude! I will ask again, what is your name?"
"Shadhap!" he replied again.
"Look here son, are you looking for trouble?"
"Oh my gosh yes! How did you know?"
The policeman now furious, "Where are your manners?"
"In the toilet sir!"
~~And the policeman fainted~~
And the cop shot him.
