The Best 17 Warns Jokes

Following is our collection of Warns jokes which are very funny. There are some warns caution jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these warns notify puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Warns Jokes and Puns

A wife is at home watching the news.

On the TV she sees footage of a crazy man driving the wrong way on the freeway. She realizes her husband takes the same path home from work. She immediately calls him and warns him of the danger. She says, "Be careful! There's a crazy man driving on the wrong side of the freeway!"

The husband replies, "One!? There's hundreds of them!"

In school, the teacher warns her students...

..."I will not tolerate any excuses for any kind. I might consider a nuclear attack, serious injury or even the death of a relative, but whoever misses this exam will fail the class."

The class's wise-guy says:

"But teacher, what if tomorrow I arrive to class completely exhausted from last night's amazing sex?"

The teacher says:

"Well I guess you'll have to do the exam with your left hand, then."

Guy goes to the doctor for a prostate exam

Doctor warns him, "It is normal to get an erection while I perform this procedure, so don't be alarmed".

After the doctor is all finished the guy says, "Doc, I never got an erection, I didn't even feel like I was going to get one".

The doctor smiles and says, "Oh, not you silly".

Restaurant owner warns his employee: "one must open oysters carefully"...

The employee answers: "no shucking fit!"

The surgeon general warns, "do not run while smoking marijuana".

It's hard on your joints.


Pence warns North Korea that the "era of strategic patience is over."

He continued, "Now we enter the era of strategically sending North Korea to its room without the new WiFi password."

Bill O'Reilly is holding a lecture about nuclear physics. When he starts taking about bosons he warns his audience:

"Caution: you're about to enter the no spin zone."

A dentist warns his patient...

Dentist: Be advised: this will hurt a lot!
Patient: Nahh don't worry. I can deal with pain very well.
Dentist: I have an affair with your wife since 2009...

Pope Francis warns the public about the evils of Horoscope readings...

Born: December 17, "Your ideas are abstract and don't always make reasonable sense."

What a Sagittarius thing to say...

Jack the ripper walks into a Bar...

and orders Isabella's Islay scotch. Bartender warns "It will cost you an arm and a leg".

Jack the ripper's reply:"its a deal"

A man is sitting next to woman on a bus

The woman is trying to breastfeed, but the baby refuses to suck on her breast. She warns her child, if you don't start sucking, I'm going to give it to the man next to me , but the baby still refuses.

After 20 minutes, the woman repeats the threat several times to no avail. The man finally clears his throat and says, look here lady, you need to make up your mind, I was supposed to get off 6 bus stops ago!

You can explore warns asks reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean warns beware dad jokes. There are also warns puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A man goes to the doctor for an annual checkup

When the doctor walks in he looks at the man's chart and says although it is awkward, I believe you are the right age for a prostate exam.
The man sighs, bends over the table and drops his drawers.
Now just to let you know this may cause an erection, warns the doctor.
I think I'll be fine, the man replied
I wasn't talking about you.

A brunette and a blonde visit a motel

Before they go in, brunette warns her friend "Don't fill in your own address. Pick some European country. They won't know the difference.".

In the form brunette states her country of origin as "Hungary" while the blonde, trying to remain inconspicuous, writes "Thirsty".

Breast Feeding

A man is sitting next to a woman who is trying to breast feed her baby on the bus. The baby refuses to eat and the mother warns, "If you don't eat I'll give it to the man next to me." The baby refuses. After 20 mins the mother repeats the threat. The man clears his throat and says, "Hey woman, you better make up your mind. I was supposed to get off the bus 6 stops ago!"

What do you call a dog who warns you about danger at the yogurt drink factory?

Mango Lassi

A guy says to his buddy, "I'm thinking about buying a labrador."

His pal warns, "That might not be such a good idea. Have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"

Japanese Ministry of Artistic Affairs Warns the Art of Origami is in Decline!

More on this as the story unfolds.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the warns warn jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working warns urged piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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