Walk The Plank Jokes
34 walk the plank jokes and hilarious walk the plank puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about walk the plank that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Walk The Plank Short Jokes
Short walk the plank jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The walk the plank humour may include short plank jokes also.
- Why don't pirates shower before they walk the plank? Because they'll just wash up on shore later.
- As a child I was made to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog.
Courtesy of Gary Delaney - Why didn't the pirates bathe before walking the plank? They figured they'd wash up on shore later.
- Did you hear about the pirate who used to walk the plank every night? Well, he couldn't afford a dog.
- Why didn't the pirate take a shower before walking the plank? He'll just wash up on shore later.
- I need karma but here's a joke Why don't pirates take a shower before they walk the plank
Cause they wash up on shore - Why doesn't a pirate take a shower before he walks the plank? 'Cause he'll just wash up on shore later.
- Have you heard about the guy who didn't want to walk the plank? He wasn't on board with it.
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Walk The Plank One Liners
Which walk the plank one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with walk the plank? I can suggest the ones about walk of shame and man overboard.
- Pirates never shower before they walk the plank. They just wash up on shore afterward.
- When I was young, my parents made me walk the plank.. We were too poor for a dog.
- As a kid I was made to walk the plank... We couldn't afford a dog
- Why don't pirates take a shower before they walk the plank? They just wash up on shore.
- Why don't pirates shower before walking the plank? Because they wash up on shore.
- As a child, I was forced to walk the plank... We couldn't afford a dog...
- When I Was Younger... I was made to walk the plank
My family couldn't afford a dog. - When I was a kid my parents use to make me walk the plank... we couldn't afford a dog
- Q: What did the emu say to the nurse?
A: Mend her bones or walk the plank
Walk The Plank Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about walk the plank you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean shipwrecked jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make walk the plank pranks.
How I learned to miknd my own business:
I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, and all the patients were yelling "13...13...13..."
The fence was too high for me to see over but I saw a little gap in the planks, so I looked through to see what was going on.
Someone poked me in the eye with a stick and then they all started shouting "14... 14... 14..."!
I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, and all the patients were shouting, "13... 13... 13..."
The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a little gap in the planks, so I looked through to see what was going on.
Some idiot poked me in the eye with a stick, then they all started shouting, "14.... 14... 14..."
I was walking by a mental institution on my way to work
And in the yard behind the fence, I heard people shouting "four, four, four...". I was curious so I peeked through the wood planks to see what was happening. Someone jabbed a stick in my eye and then everyone started shouting "five, five, five...".
Pegleg Pete the Pirate decided to retire
He fired his crew, ran his ship aground, and built a small cabin for himself just a short walk from the beach. He enjoyed his quiet life until global warming turned his front yard into a swamp. He couldn't get down to the shore without struggling through muck and mud that was once his peaceful stroll. Finally, he realized only one solution was possible: he was going to have to plank the walk.
How I learned to mind my own business
I was walking past a mental hospital the other day.
And the patients were shouting 13, 13, 13.. the fence was too high high to see over. But there was a small gap in the planks, so I looked through to see what's going on….
…
Some idiot poked me in the eye with a stick
And the next thing I hear from over the fence is all the patients chanting 14……14…..14….
So a pirate captain walked into my candy shop the other day...
And he asks me for a gumdrop. I say to him "Why would you want gum that's been dropped?"
"Sir," I say, "Wouldn't you rather have a candy fish?"
He says, "Candy fish? Is it sweet?"
And I say "Well... it's Swedish."
So now, the captain is so angry that he makes we walk the plank and I shout "Don't you think you're going a little overboard?!" And the pirate says, "No, *you* are!"
Before I jump, I ask him, "Can I just have one last mug of rootbeer?" And he says, "That would be fine." So I take the mug and jump... and you know? I would've drowned if it weren't for one thing...
>Rootbeer floats!<
"Seven!" "Seven!" "Seven!"
A man was walking along, when he came upon a a property with a plank fence surrounding it. He hears people inside chanting the number seven over and over again. He doesn't know much about this property, except that a cult meets there, he can't see through the fence, and he's always been curious about it. When he hears "Seven!" "Seven!" "Seven!" he can't help himself, he peeks through a hole in one of the planks. Someone promptly pokes him in the eye with a stick. They begin chanting "Eight!" "Eight!" "Eight!"
A pirate walks into a bar one day...
...And he sees his old captain sitting down having a drink. So he goes up to say hello and catch up, but he notices that his old captain looks a little different. So he goes over to talk to him. "Captain," he says, "I haven't seen you in years. It's good to see you, but man, you look a little different. I notice that you have a wooden leg! What happened?"
"Gyarr," says the captain, "You be correct. Ya see during a fearsome storm, a huge wave hit me boat, and my leg got trapped under a chain, and ripped it off, so I had to get this here peg leg."
"Wow" says the pirate. "That's terrible. But what happened to your hand? You have a hook now!"
"Gyarr," says the captian, "You be correct. Ya see I was captured by the enemy one day, and they were forcin me to walk the plank, but I turned back and tried to escape, and they cut me hand off, and I had to get this here hook."
Wincing, the pirate says "Christ! Now what happened to your eye? You have a glass eye now."
"Gyarr," says the captain, "You be correct. Well, as I was sailing the sea one day, I happened to look up, and a seagull pooped right in my eye."
Confused, the pirate responds "Well, captain, that sounds bad, but that wouldn't make you lose your eye."
"True," pines the captain, "But it was the first day with me hook."