Wailing Jokes
22 wailing jokes and hilarious wailing puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about wailing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article will discuss different types of "wailing jokes" related to the Wailing Wall, tantrums, weeping, and crying. Learn more about why these jokes are funny, and why they make people laugh out loud.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Wailing Short Jokes
Short wailing jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The wailing humour may include short weeping jokes also.
- So I was in the movie theatre... and I was watching an incredibly sad film. So sad that the man behind me started wailing, then he hit me in the head with a harpoon.
- The angel of death appears before a lawyer and says "Your time has come". The lawyer starts crying and wailing "But I'm only forty" Angel of death says "Not according to your billable hours"
- Having a cat is just like having a girlfriend ... They both
* wail and moan when you neglect to feed them
* bite and scratch when you try to pet them
* keep escaping from the basement - Boy arrives home from school and wails: Mum, everyone says I'm too hairy. Mum yells to her husband: Honey, the dog is talking!!
Share These Wailing Jokes With Friends
Wailing One Liners
Which wailing one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with wailing? I can suggest the ones about screaming and crying.
- I visited the wailing wall the other day... standing there like an idiot with my harpoon.
- You know your short when You can hear the wails of the dammed
- Woke up tonight to the wails of sirens. Totally forgot to feed them.
- Which religious site has had an influx of Japanese pilgrims? The Wailing Wall.
- What do you call a wailing chinese puppy? A chiwah-wah!
- What do you call a wailing child born in a tank of liquid nitrogen? A cryobaby
- How can you tell who's the Polish Jew at The Wailing Wall? He's the guy with the harpoon.
- What screams, wails, and lights up? A bus-load of babies on fire.
Cheerful Fun Wailing Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy
What funny jokes about wailing you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean screeching jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make wailing pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Doctor tells his patient "I have good news and bad news..."
Guy says "what's the bad news?" Doctor says "you have cancer, it's terminal." Guy starts wailing "Ohhh that's terrible! Oh my god! I can't believe it! Well what's the *good* news then?" Doctor says "you see that blonde bombshell receptionist? I'm *f**...'* 'er!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife got very upset at the f**... the other day, wailing and thumping the coffin with her fists
And Jeeeeez, you should've heard her when she went in the furnace.
I bought my 2 year old son some toys from the movie Toy Story.
It seemed like a good idea at the time because he loved those movies. Turns out, he didn't like the toys. Wailing, he threw a figurine at the wall, shattering it.
It was a total buzzkill.
Jewish man calls his mom. "Mama, I have good news and bad news..."
Mother, ever the optimist: "Give me the bad news."
Man: "I can't live a lie anymore. I'm gay."
Mother, a traditional conservative woman, after the wailing and the gnashing of teeth that was expected of her by her son, regains her composure and asks: "Well, what's the good news?"
Man: "So I met this nice Jewish doctor..."
Trump goes to Israel
and while praying at the wailing wall, suffers a massive heart attack and dies. The Israeli diplomat says they can bury him in the Holy Land for 100 bucks or embalm him and ship him back for 50k. The American diplomat opts for the 50k option. The Israeli asks why take the most expensive solution? The American responds, well another man buried here rose from the dead and we cannot take that chance.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was very upset at the f**... the other day.
I started wailing and moaning and b**... on the coffin
In the end they opened it and let me out.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My mother-in-law made a real exhibition of herself at the f**..., crying and wailing
Especially when she went in the furnace.
A groundskeeper was walking through a graveyard
A groundskeeper was walking through a graveyard when he heard someone sobbing. He turned down a row of headstones to see a man kneeling in front of a grave and wailing.
"How could you do this to me?! ?" He cried. "I can't eat, I can't sleep, every second is agony! Why didn't you say anything?!" he paused when he noticed he wasn't alone.
"I'm sorry for your loss." the groundskeeper said awkwardly. "You must miss your wife terribly."
"My wife?" The kneeling man said through his tears.
"This grave belongs to her first husband!"
