The Best 17 Vultures Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Vultures jokes. There are some vultures geese jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these vultures opossums puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Vultures Jokes and Puns

As migration approached, two elderly vultures

As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane.

When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. "Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?" she asked.

"No, thanks," replied the vultures. "They're carrion."

Lazy vultures

Two lazy vultures had procrastinated on flying south for the winter until the first frost hit, then they got worried. "We better catch an airplane to Mexico, lets go to the airport!" So they take off down the road, and as luck would have it, they come across two dead road-killed opossums, that had started to get nice and smelly, just like vultures like them. "What luck, we better take these with us, I heard the airlines don't offer meals on the flight anymore." So they each grab a dead opossum, tuck it under their wing, and head on to the terminal. They walk up to the ticket counter and tell they lady "We'd like two tickets to Cancun, please."

"Very well," she says, "Will you be checking any bags?"

"No," say the vultures, holding up the dead opossum carcasses, "we only have carrion."

A young vulture is tired of eating nothing but scavenged meat...

So he says to his father, "Dad, can't we eat something else for a change? I'd like to try some vegetables."

The father is outraged, claiming that vultures do not eat vegetables, that is not their way. But the young vulture doesn't give up. He asks again the next day, and the next, and the next. Eventually the father relents, and agrees on a compromise. The young vulture could eat some vegetables, but only if he finished his meat first.

The following day, the young vulture asks what they will be eating that evening. The father replies, "Carrion, my wayward son. There'll be peas when you are done."

Vultures joke, A young vulture is tired of eating nothing but scavenged meat...

Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons.

The flight attendant looks at them and says, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger."

Why do vultures find it easy to fly?

They only ever have carrion baggage.


Many ravens are called a congress...

Owls are a parliament, eagles are a convocation and crows are a murder.

Does this mean that a group of vultures are a corporation?

Why are commercial flights always cheaper for vultures?

All their luggage is carrion.

Vultures joke, Why are commercial flights always cheaper for vultures?

A police officer comes across several vultures grouped together.

He gets closer to see what they're doing. It's obvious that they're eating a dead animal. The officer says, "sorry, carry on" and goes on his way.

What do you call a group of superhero vultures?

The Scavengers

What do you call a team of superpowered coyotes, raccoons, and vultures?

The Scavengers.

When vultures fly...

...do you think they bring carrion luggage?

You can explore vultures hummingbirds reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean vultures predatory dad jokes. There are also vultures puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What did the lieutenant vulture say to the enlisted vultures who stopped eating a dead cow to salute?

Carrion.

Vultures always fly first class.

Move or they'll eat your carrion.

Why do vultures make good Brits?

Because they eat common carrion.

Why are vultures boycotting the airlines?

Why are vultures boycotting the airlines?

They keep raising the price of carrion.

Why do vultures hate flying?

Because they have to pay extra for Carrion!

Budum tsssss

Vultures joke, Why do vultures hate flying?

Why don't turkey vultures ever lose their luggage?

They only *carrion*...

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the vultures carrion jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working vultures predator piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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