Volcano Jokes

What are some Volcano jokes?

The internet is so full of people making up fake stories for fake internet points that no one is giving any credit to the real heroes anymore...

Like me, who just yesterday beat up a volcano

Scientists say that the Yellowstone super-volcano is overdue for an eruption.

Apparently the volcano has eruptile dysfunction.

What did 1 volcano say to another volcano?

That ash.

What did one volcano say to the other volcano?

I lava you

Why are volcanoes mischievous?

Because they erupt to no good.

What do you call it when the rim of a volcano gets all dirty and smelly?

Smagma.

The Calbuco volcano is very hot right now...

But everything around it is Chile.

My girl says I'm like a volcano in bed...

Dormant

Where do volcanoes go to relieve themselves?

The lavatory, of course!

What did the Italian volcano say to his girlfriend?

I lava you!

What is it a volcano has which gives him trouble erupting?

Eruptile dysfunction.

What do you get when you cross a Classical German composer with an erupting volcano?

Baklava.

(It came to me in a dream last night. I dunno man..)

What does baby volcano say to his volcano mom?

Magma.

What kind of code does a volcano use to make its website?

HTMelt

"How much longer are we going to have endure this erupting volcano full of hot air and gas" asked the Hawaiian

"I don't know, but turn off Twitter for a short term solution"

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs inside a volcano?

Anakin Skywalker.

(Happy Geek Pride Day!)

A man phoned to find out whether he could get insurance if the nearby volcano erupted...

They assured him he would be covered.

How do you make baklava?

Take a chicken and drop it in a volcano.

Did you hear about the bird that lost all of its feathers in a volcano?

It was moltin'.

What did the affectionate volcano tell the Hawaiian homeowner?

"I lava you."

Why was the volcano so pleasant to be around?

Because he was so magmanimous.

What do you call a mean person who fell in a pit created by a volcano?

Ashhole.

What does Sean Connery's nemesis and the crater of a volcano have in common?

They're both ash-holes.

A cake in an oven

Society needs to stop discriminating, we don't question a baker having a cake in the oven but as soon as I put 4 children and 2 horses in a volcano im the bad guy

What comes out of a reasonable volcano?

Pragma.

My girlfriend said she wanted to experiment more in the bedroom...

I don't know why she got so mad when I put my baking soda and vinegar volcano next to the nightstand.

What do you call it when a volcano that can only remain dormant

Eruptile dysfunction

What do you get when you throw a chicken in a volcano?

Baklava

Why did a hippie head to a volcano?

So he can get himself a lava lamp!

There's a cool sport called Volcano Diving.....

You'll only do it once.

My most prized possession is a genuine traditional coffee pot hand crafted in an artisanal workshop on the slopes of a Mexican volcano.

It's a proper Popocatepetl kettle.

I had a really hot dream last night...

I was in the middle of the desert, high noon, next to an erupting volcano, wearing a parka.

Volcanoes erupt to no good

What did the Romantic Hurricane say to the sheep covered volcano?

Eye Lava Ewe

What did the volcano say after 3 years in Bangkok?

Me lava you long time.

Blonde, brunette, and a redhead. (I told this joke outloud to the whole class when I was in 2nd grade and got sent to the office)

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are all running from the cops and end up getting cornered. The brunette points behind the cops and screams "tornado!" The cops all turn around and she runs away. The redhead points the same direction and screams "volcano eruption!" Once again, the cops turn around and the redhead runs away. Only the blonde is left and she screams "fire!" So the cops shoot her and she dies.

Sex with me is like a volcano...

you know it's going to burn.

This year's Comic-Con will be hosted in Hawaii

in the hopes that sacrificing a few virgins will appease the angry volcano god.

An African, a Mexican, and an American...

An african, a mexican, and an american are standing on the edge of a volcano. The african throws a bag of sand in and says: "We have too much of this in my country". the Mexican throws in a burrito and says: "We have too many on these in my country". The American throws the mexican in and says: "we have too many of these..."

How to make Volcano jokes?

We have collected gags and puns about Volcano to have fun with. Do you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Volcano? If Yes here are a lot more hilarious lines and funny Volcano pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes