Vivid Jokes
9 vivid jokes and hilarious vivid puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about vivid that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Giggle-Inducing Vivid Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
What is a good vivid joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Just woke up from a dream about Roman numerals 5, 4, 1, and 500.
It was VIVID.
Lucky Number 7
I had a vivid dream of the number 7, just a giant 7... and when I woke up, it was 7:00... so I get up and decide to go to the track, because I like to play the ponies.. and I get a cab, and the cab pulls up, and it's number 7... so I get to the track and I ask what I owe, and it was $7.77... I go in through gate 7 and the only booth open is the 7th. I look at the board and in the 7th race there's a horse named Lucky Number 7 and his odds are 77/1. So I put $700 on him... and believe it not... he came in 7th.
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⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I have the most vivid memories from my infancy
They're the breast.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Ricky Gervais has sold the rights to do an 'adult' adaptation of 'The Office' to Vivid Picture.
It will be called 'The o**...'.
What is a female hockey player's most vivid memory?
Her first period on the ice.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Finnish WWII air force verteran was about to give a talk to an American high school.
He was stereotypically Nordic: pale skin, fair hair, and a heavy accent.
He introduced himself and began with a vivid description of his first dogfight in the Lapland War. "Literally the moment after we take off and got through the fog we saw them. Eight pesky Fokkers were spread out and firing in front of me and my buddies. We had to go in defense position and try to outflank them, but they got flight leader. On second approach we shot a few down and dispersed the rest. On third approach I shot two Fokkers down, but another one got me in the rudder. I went into tail spin and had to bail out. Luckily the f**...-"
The principal of the school suddenly interjected, as at this point nearly everyone was laughing. "Now, students, please be respectful of our guest and where he is from. As some of you may know, a Fokker," the principal said slowly, carefully pronouncing the word, "is a type of German fighter plane used in World War II. There is no need to-"
The Finn had to interrupt, "Excuse me Mr. Principal, actually Fokker is Dutch. We were shooting down Messerschmitts."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three guys go on a skiing trip.
The lodge they check into only has one room available, so they decide to all sleep in the same bed. They go skiing and have a lot of fun, and come back to the lodge and go to bed.
The next day the guy who slept on the right side of the bed said, I had the most vivid dream that I was getting a h**... last night! The guy who slept on the left side said, That's incredible, I had the same exact dream!
The guy who slept in the middle said, That's funny, I had a dream I was skiing.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The darkest clouds makes the most vivid rainbows
And black guys are the best g**...
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the dirtiest or sexiest joke you have ever heard?
Not the dirtiest but I laughed.
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Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a h**...!" The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same dream, too. Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, "That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing!"
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