Violins Jokes

79 violins jokes and hilarious violins puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about violins that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Violins Short Jokes

Short violins jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The violins humour may include short violin fiddle jokes also.

  1. String Fight My ex used to hit me with stringed instruments. If only I had known about her history of violins.
  2. A friend told me he doesn't let his kids watch orchestra performances cuz there's too much sax and violins. I told him puns make me wanna commit violins.
  3. What did the conductor do when half of the cello section called in sick a week before a major concert? He was forced to resort to excessive violins.
  4. I should really take the Violin more seriously. Right now it's just something I fiddle with.
  5. Mama and Papa did not let me listen to classical or jazz music as a kid. Too much sax and violins, apparently.
  6. All these video games with epic orchestral music scores. Those concerned mums were right, there's way too much violins in video games.
  7. My therapist told me to listen to classical music before work to help with my anger management issues. This morning I woke up and chose violins.
  8. Why is it dangerous to have more than one violin in your house? Because it leads to domestic violins.
    (From my 9 year old...)
  9. My mother took me to the symphony when I was a child.. But we had to leave because of all the sax and violins.
  10. A cello player was found dead earlier this week. Police suspect he was murdered They think the crime was orchestrated, but could not rule out a random act of violins

Share These Violins Jokes With Friends

Violins One Liners

Which violins one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with violins? I can suggest the ones about violinist and string instruments.

  1. Making love to a woman is like playing a violin… I don't know how to do it…
  2. Why was the Jazz movie rated R Too much sax and violins
  3. Don't let your kids watch symphonies on TV There's too much sax and violins.
  4. What does a violin player use as birth control? Their personality
  5. Why shouldn't you let kids watch big band performances on TV? Too much sax and violins.
  6. I would never let my kids watch the orchestra, too much sax and violins.
  7. I'd never let my children watch the orchestra There's too much sax and violins.
  8. Why did Karl Marx's toilet play music? Because of the violins inherent in the cistern
  9. How did the orchestra start a riot? With violins
  10. You shouldn't let your kids go to music class. There's too much sax and violins.
  11. Why shouldn't you let your kids watch an orchestra? There's a lot of *sax and violins*.
  12. I can't listen to orchestral music anymore Too much sax and violins.
  13. I don't let my kids watch the orchestra Too much sax and violins
  14. How did the violinist learn to play violin? He just started fiddling with it.
  15. How do you make an accordion sound like a violin? Light it on fire.

Violins joke

Hilarious Violins Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about violins you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean music instruments jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make violins pranks.

I would never hit someone with a musical instrument...

I don't like to resort to violins

I'm not going to let my kids listen to symphonies and big bands...

too much sax and violins

Why didn't the pacifist enjoy the symphony?

All the violins

Why does Marx's toilet play a sonata when flushed?

Because of the violins inherent in the cistern.

Why does Karl Marx's toilet play music every time you flush it?

Because of the violins inherent in the cistern.

An orchestra concert is no place for a child.

Sometimes there's intense violins

Symphony of puns

i never let my kids listen to jazz or classical music...
Too much sax or violins can only lead to treble!

Why did the police arrest the musician who homemade his instruments?

Domestic violins!

What do you call it when one musician abuses another?

An act of violins.

Why should you never hit people with violins??

Because violins is not the answer...

Did you hear about the unnecessarily large string orchestra?

It was shut down due to mass violins

Never let your children play in an orchestra.

Too much sax and violins.
* Credit to maxwell bot.

I'd never let my kids watch an orchestral performance.

Too much sax and violins.

The Violin Ensemble playing in Carnegie Hall somehow got an R-18 rating...

The censors say it contains explicit scenes of violins encore.

Why do muslims love classical music?

It has lots of violins

All music classes were banned at my school...

They said the classes encouraged too much sax and violins...

Why was the musical R-rated?

Because there was lots of Sax and Violins.

My neighbors called the cops on me, but when the police came to my house all they found was my collection of string instruments.

I got charged with domestic violins.

Did you hear about the conductor who was arrested for inciting violins?

They strung him up, but he didn't fret.
*Cogwheel takes a bow*

Why classical music is not recommended for young people?

Because it contains sax and violins

Why was Gandhi thrown out of the orchestra?

He rejected the violins.

Why aren't concerts suitable for children?

Too much sax and violins.

My grandpa left me a violin and an oil painting in his will.

When I took them to be valued, I was told that they were by Van Gogh and Stradivarius. Sadly they were worthless as Van Gogh was rubbish at making violins and Stradivarius was an awful painter.

I passed by a music shop the other day

All the instruments were painted with cool pictures and patterns. However, it didn't allow children due to graphic violins and sax.

People were astounded to find a stringed instrument hidden within the dry well

but it was merely more evidence of the violins inherent in the cistern.

I just bought an undiscovered Stradivarius and an original Rembrandt!

Unfortunately, on further investigation I was able to discover that Rembrandt made useless violins and Stradivarius painted like a pre-schooler.

What did Slim Shady ask the class on his first day of teaching at music school?

"Hi kids, do you like violins?"

You should never let your children watch the symphony on television.

Too much sax and violins

Why did Martha pull her kids out of band class?

Too much Sax and Violins.

Why are band and orchestra rated R?

All the sax and violins

Nowadays there's too many musical instruments

It seems today, that all you see is violins in movies and sax on TV

Why don't film soundtracks use jazz and classical?

Too much sax and violins.

Why did the police attack the peaceful demonstration for Elijah McClain?

They were told to fight violins with violence.

I slapped my violin out of anger

I got arrested for domestic violins

Why can't kids watch the orchestra?

To much sax and violins

What do you call it when a symphony musician hits his wife?

Domestic violins.

I found an old violin and a painting in the attic.

The antique dealer said, "The good news is you've got a Stradivarius and a Picasso. The bad news is Stradivarius was a terrible painter and Picasso made c**... violins."

I was listening to the orchestra but I had to turn off the radio...

There was too much sax and violins.

Mom wouldn't let me see the orchestra movie

She said there was too much sax and violins

I was walking down the street today, and noticed a woman screaming at her son. How do you lose a cello, it's as big as you are? Where could you have possibly lost it, tell me or so help me.

I walked up to the woman, and said for the sake of your son, please do not resort to violins.

My ex used to hit me with stringed instruments.

**She had a history of violins.**

Why is Karl Marx's toilet so noisy?

Because of the violins inherent in the cistern.

We should all be afraid of fiddle players

Everyday they wake up, and chose violins

Apparently, Stradivarius's are so rare people will literally kill for a chance to get one

Violins begets violence

Violins joke, A friend told me he doesn't let his kids watch orchestra performances cuz there's too much sax and v

jokes about violins