Vicious Jokes
49 vicious jokes and hilarious vicious puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about vicious that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Discover the art of taking vicious jokes to the next level with savagely funny and brutally hilarious ideas. Learn how to create vicious circles of mockery that will leave your friends victorious in laughter.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Vicious Short Jokes
Short vicious jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The vicious humour may include short venomous jokes also.
- I keep getting hit by the same bike, at the same time and place, day after day... It's a vicious cycle.
- Every morning when I leave the house, a bike comes out of nowhere and runs me over. It's a vicious cycle.
- People were so scared of those vicious clowns a few months back, then they accidentally put one in office
- I was viciously attacked by a flock of sheep… But there was nothing I could do to stop the bleating.
- I have a bike with no seat. It hurts to ride, and no one wants to buy it because it has no seat. So I'm stuck riding this bike. It's a vicious cycle.
- Some of my clothes are getting ripped to shreds when I use the washing machine. It keeps happening every time. I think it's a vicious cycle.
- What do you call a mean bike? A vicious cycle!
Fellow dad buddy of mine got me with it today lol - Two blind dudes are fighting really viciously. How do you stop them? You shout, I'm betting on the dude with the knife!
- what do you get if you cross a poodle with a pit bull? not much of a watchdog, but it's a vicious gossip.
- Why did Turkey cross the road To invade Byzantium of course, the Turks were vicious when it came to invasion.
Share These Vicious Jokes With Friends
Vicious One Liners
Which vicious one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with vicious? I can suggest the ones about wicked and furious.
- Every single morning I get hit by the same bike It's a vicious cycle.
- A bike in town keeps running me over It's a vicious cycle
- I keep falling off my bike. It's a vicious cycle.
- Did you hear about the man who got hit by a bike every morning? It was a vicious cycle.
- What's round and bad tempered? A vicious circle
- Every time I go for a Jog I get hit by the same bike It's a vicious cycle
- Why did the man get hit by a bike every day? He was stuck in a vicious cycle.
- Why did the man keep getting hit by the bike? He was stuck in a vicious cycle.
- I fell off my bike 3 days in a row Its a vicious cycle
I tried. - My friend rides a bike with a spike on the seat It's a vicious cycle.
- How many Kings does it take to viciously destroy a room full of lightbulbs ? Vi Kings
- Just Bought a New Road Bike It's a vicious cycle.
- What's the scariest thing in geometry? A vicious circle.
- In Russia Life is a vicious sickle.
- What do you call a bike that is also being convicted of a m**... A vicious cycle!
Amusing Vicious Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What funny jokes about vicious you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean aggressive jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make vicious pranks.
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, the rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town to "persuade" them to close. Terrified, they did so - thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
I discovered my mother in law has weekly sessions with l**... himself on how to be even more vicious.
I've no idea what kind of fees she's charging him.
A man has a wonderful Horse
It's a marvellous Horse, good looking and everything. But it also occasionally gets very dangerous and vicious.
Causes tons of trouble, breaks things, violent etc.
So he goes to the vet and asks what can I do with this horse
The vet says that's a very easy problem and I am glad to help you
The man says ok, so what should I do
The Vet says the next time your horse is behaving well, sell it
"You gotta help man, my bike's possessed. If I ride it, it bites me, if I don't, it still bites me."
"It's a vicious cycle."
"You think that's bad? My bike's turned entirely into clumpy goo."
"It's a viscous cycle."
"You think that's bad?! My bike's turned into a man, and then gone off to compete in the olympics."
"It's discus michael."
A person gets hit by a bicycle.
So this person wakes up, as usual, to get ready to go to work. They do their normal routine: brush teeth, eat breakfast, get dressed, etc... On their way to work, they get hit by a bicycle.
The next day, the same thing happens. Get ready for work, leave, get hit by a bicycle. This goes on for weeks.
It was a vicious cycle.
What's the difference between a Cardassian and a Kardashian?
One is a vicious, opportunistic race, bent on subjugation and d**... through whatever insidious and ethically-questionable means they have at hand.
The other is a fictional race from Star Trek.
Bros, friends, amigos... If she gives you this for her address, just go ahead and move on. Toss that cocktail napkin away. Move on. THere's other fish in the sea. (feel free to add to the list)
• Drinkand Dr.
• Vicious Circle
• West 943,185th Street
• Psycho Path
• Peoples Ct.
• Nofriggin Way
Chuck Norris walks into a bar...
He immediately unleashes a vicious roundhouse kick, decapitating a rabbi, a priest, and a Buddhist in one blow. At the next table, he beard-punches a blonde, a brunette and a redhead, killing all three. Three bouncers, an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Pollack, were dismembered in seconds.
Chuck Norris' has only 1 weakness: He can't tell a joke.
An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman...
An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman meet by chance in a tavern. After a brief but vicious scuffle, they all agree to put their differences aside and work together...to beat up the Irishman tending the bar.
A sloth was walking through the jungle one day when he was set upon by a gang of vicious snails.
The snails left him bleeding and confused at the bottom of a tree. Several hours later he summoned the strength to go to the police station and report the assault.
He was asked by the desk sergeant to describe his attackers. He replied, I don't know what they looked like, it all happened so fast.
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, the rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town to "persuade" them to close. Terrified, they did so - thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
Little Jimmy comes home from school with a black eye
Mom says, Jimmy! What happened?!
Jimmy says, I was attacked in geometry class.
Bye whom? Asked mom, already calling the school.
It was a vicious circle.
Don't...don't make me
Doctor: You took a pretty vicious hit to the head, do you know who you are?
Me: Sure
Doctor: Who is the President of the United States?
Me: ...
Doctor: ...
Me: don't...don't make me say it
What's the difference between a brutal military overthrow and a Volkswagen Beetle made out of mucus?
One's a vicious coup and the other is a viscous coupe.
It's double standards!!!!
When The Hulk goes off into a vicious rage and destroys everything, he's "Incredible."
But when I do it,
I'm, "an alcoholic."
