Vehemently Jokes
9 vehemently jokes and hilarious vehemently puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about vehemently that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Amusing Vehemently Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What is a good vehemently joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A woman in a store was complaining vehemently about her bathroom fan.
I guess she really needed to vent.
My wife was vehemently prolife.
Until she heard the news that my girlfriend is pregnant.
An Irish Proposal
An Irishman proposed to his girlfriend on Saint Patrick's Day and gave her a ring with a synthetic diamond.
On learning it wasn't real she protested vehemently about his cheapness.
He explained that in honor of Saint Patrick's Day, he picked her a sham-rock.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Some people are vehemently against m**....
But I don't really care, you do you.
Father caught his young son cursing vehemently.
Father: Promise you'll never swear again!
Son: Yes dad!
Father: You swear?
Why couldn't the Chinese geologist find a date?
He was vehemently opposed to wrong rocks on the beach.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Historians are torn as to whether or not h**... had a favorite date
Some say that he vehemently denied having one
while others say it was 9/9/99
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Rabbi and a Roman Catholic Priest sit next to each other on a plane.
They start talking about themselves and after a while the priest asks the Rabbi if he has ever eaten pork before. The Rabbi denies it vehemently but the priest keeps pushing until finally the Rabbi admits that he had once before he became a Rabbi. The Rabbi, not happy with the events, asks the priest if he's ever had s**... before. The priest denies it but the Rabbi keeps pushing until finally the priest admits that he had before he became a priest. The Rabbi, not content yet, leans forward and says "it's better than pork isn't it".
In a small Texas town,
the owner of Joe's Bar began construction on a new building to increase his business. The local Baptist church started a campaign to block the bar from opening with petitions and prayers. Work progressed right up till the week before opening when lightning struck the bar and it burned to the ground.
The church folks were rather smug after that, until the bar owner sued the church on the grounds that the church was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, either through direct or indirect actions or means. The church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise in its reply to the court.
As the judge looked over the paperwork at the hearing, he commented, "I don't know how I'm going to decide this, but as it appears from the paperwork, we have a bar owner who believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that does not."
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