The Best 35 Van Gogh Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Van Gogh jokes. There are some van gogh jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these van gogh puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Van Gogh Jokes and Puns

What did Mike Tyson say to Vincent van Gogh??

You gonna eat that?

I asked Vincent van gogh to get me 6 eggs from the store, he came back with three...

Forgot he can only hear half of what I'm saying

What type of fuel do painters prefer?

Whatever makes the van gogh..

-id like to mention, for what its worth, that this is an original joke (as stupid as it is), which i thought of independently. I was and am proud of it. If anyone finds it somewhere else please burst my bubble.

Why did Van Gogh become a painter?

Because he didn't have an ear for music.

Art Thief

An art thief pulls off an incredible heist at the Louvre. He loads a bunch of priceless paintings in the back of his van and drives off.

He is about to make the perfect getaway when his van suddenly stops. The authorities nab him, and one of them asks "what happened to the van?"

The thief replies:

"I did not have the Monet

to buy Degas

to make the Van Gogh"


Art Thief

A mastermind thief infiltrates The Louvre and steals several paintings. He loads them all into his van and drives off. A few blocks away, his van breaks down. When the police arrive on the scene, one of the officers asks the mastermind how something like this could happen if he was so smart. The mastermind replies with "I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh."

An Art Thief is Sitting in His Driveway...

He didn't have any Monet, to buy Degas, to make his Van Gogh.

What did Van Gogh name the ear he didn't cut off?

Van Stay

What did the artist say to get his vehicle moving

Van Gogh

A joke from work

Four famous actors get together and decide to dress up as famous artists for Halloween.

Leonardo DiCaprio says he'll go as Da Vinci since they have the same first name.

Tom Cruise says he'll go as Van Gogh so they have two painters.

Bill Murray says he'll go as Beethoven since he likes his music.

Arnold Schwarzenegger just looks at them and says "I'll be Bach."

An art museum robber is caught when he tries to get away....

A reporter asks him what went wrong with the robbery. He answers " I didn't have the Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.

You can explore van gogh reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean van gogh dad jokes. There are also van gogh puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Recently, a burglar in Paris...

Recently, a burglar in Paris nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, getting in and out past heavy security, he was captured only two blocks away, when his getaway vehicle stalled in the middle of the road. When asked how he could mastermind such a daring crime, and then be caught only a couple blocks away, he replied,

I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.

Do you know why Van Gogh got into painting

Be cause he didn't have an ear for music.

Why did the art thief's van run out of gas as he drove away from the museum?

Because he had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.

My grandpa left me a violin and an oil painting in his will.

When I took them to be valued, I was told that they were by Van Gogh and Stradivarius. Sadly they were worthless as Van Gogh was rubbish at making violins and Stradivarius was an awful painter.ο»Ώ

Why did the thieves get caught after robbing the Louvre?

Cause they didn't have the Monet to get Degas to make the van Gogh.

Stop me if you heard the old joke about the art thief who got busted...

Because he had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.

You wanna hear a Van Gogh joke? Alright...

Ear goes.

Vincent Van Gogh is having a pint…

His mate Gauguin walks in to the bar and says,
Hi Vinny, fancy a beer?
Vincent says,
No thanks , I've got one 'ere… .


What do you get when you cross Van Gogh with George Thorogood?

One bourbon
One scotch
And one ear

Art thief.

Recently a guy in Paris nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, breaking in, evading security, getting out and escaping with the goods, he was captured only two blocks away when his Econoline van ran out of gas.
When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied:

"I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh."

What did the artist say when his car got stolen?

Where did my Van Gogh?

What did the art thief's say when they jumped in the getaway vehicle after a heist?

Van Gogh

Van Gogh was never good at following directions.

Everything that he was told simply went in one ear and out the- oh wait a minute...

Vincent Van Gogh's Relatives

His Obnoxious brother: Please Gogh.
His Dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh.
His prune-loving brother: Gotta Gogh.
His Convenience-Store-Owner cousin: Stop'n'Gogh
His Constipated uncle: Can't Gogh
The Ballroom dancer aunt: Tan Gogh
His Nephew psychoanalyst: E Gogh
His Fruit Loving cousin: Man Gogh
His sister who loves disco: Go Gogh
His bouncy little Nephew: Poe Gogh.

A thief tried to steal paintings from the Louvre...

A thief attempted to steal paintings from the Louvre in Paris, but was caught 2 blocks away when his van ran out of gas. All the thief could say for himself was: I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh. But I tried for it anyway because I had nothing Toulouse!

What did Vincent say when he lost his car in the parking lot?

Where did my van gogh

Which ear did Van Gogh cut off?

It doesn't matter. The other one was left.

An art thief gets caught after a heist, how so?

Many people saw his Van Gogh from the scene of the crime.

A friend of mine is convinced that Van Gogh painted the Mona Lisa.

I just don't have the 'art to correct him.

Two criminals are trying to get away from an art museum in their getaway van after stealing pieces from 3 artists.

One gets in and turns the key. The van won't start.
The other one turns and asks, "Why aren't we moving?"
"I have no Monet to buy the Gascan to make the Van Gogh."

There was a failed art theft today...

the robber reportedly was foiled because he didn't have enough Monet for Degas to make the Van Gogh.

Van Gogh wasn't known as a modest man

Or did the compliments just go in one ear.......

What did Van Gogh call his other ear?

Van Stay

Did you know I store paintings under the hood?

It makes my Van Gogh

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the van gogh jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working van gogh piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes