Us History Jokes
19 us history jokes and hilarious us history puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about us history that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Us History Short Jokes
Short us history jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The us history humour may include short american history jokes also.
- I saw my ex girlfriend at the other end of the museum hall, but I was too self conscious to say hello. There was too much history between us.
- In US Presidential History: Washington could not tell a lie, Nixon could not tell a truth... and Trump can not tell the difference
- My ex-girlfriend is standing at the opposite end of the museum from me! I want to go say hi but there's just so much history between us.
- I spotted my ex girlfriend on the other side of the museum hall, but I was too self-conscious to go say hello. There was just too much history between us.
- It's official. The winner of the biggest upset in US presidential history is T-R-U-M- A-N. 1948. HUGE upset.
Edit 3:30AM ET: this was a *lot* funnier when it was true. - This is now the longest government shut down in US History. In lighter news, if seeing who will crack first on the border wall is prolonging it, then this shut down truly is... a Mexican stand off.
- Racism is institutionalized throughout the US Why else would black history be celebrated during the shortest month!
- We all thought Uncle Jim was looking down at us from heaven when he passed But when we looked at his Reddit history the other day, we realized he's probably looking up at us instead.
- I was watching FOX Sports, but decided to switch to the History Channel... You still get to see the US destroy Japan, but there are fewer commercials!
- My history teacher told us that if a nuclear bomb was closely approaching, being flexible would be very helpful. It's so that you can bend your body and kiss your a**... goodbye.
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Us History One Liners
Which us history one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with us history? I can suggest the ones about world history and united states.
- Who was the most open minded president in us history? JFK
- Who were the greenest Presidents in US history? The Bushes
Humorous Us History Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life
What funny jokes about us history you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean history subject jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make us history pranks.
Reminiscing on our anniversary
My wife and I just had our 10th anniversary. We had some friends over to celebrate with and they asked us to talk about how we met. On our first 8 dates we just went out to different restaurants, but the next time we got tickets to see the premiere of The Dark Knight.
So I guess we could summarize our dating history as dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, BATMAN!
Dad you told me yesterday that we all came from Adam and Eve,
when I asked you about our ancestral history. "ok, then what" said dad. But mom was telling something different. She said that we all were monkeys and with passage of time and evolution changed us to human beings. Dad had a sigh of relief and replied, I was talking about my family, she was talking about her family.
One day, Hot Dog Bun Boy came home from school...
His mother saw him come in looking pretty glum and asked, "What's the matter Hot Dog Bun Boy? Did something happen?"
Hot Dog Bun Boy replied, "I was in my history class and it's so frustrating that there are no lessons at all about Hot Dog Buns like us! It's so unfair!"
The mother came up to Hot Dog Bun Boy and gave him a consoling hug. She then said, "I know son, it's not fair. But in the end, history is written by the wieners."
Popsicle
Me and Willard in the third grade got us a popsicle just as lunch was ending, We didn't have time to eat em so we just stuck em in our pocket. Later in class the history teacher ask Willard. If you're from America you are an American, what are you if you are from Europe? Willard looked confused and he didn't know the answer. To help, I whispered Willard, European, European! He looked at me and said I ain't done it, it's that d**... ole popsicle,
History teaches us that people developed their last names in ancient times for doing what they were known for in a village.
If, for example, your last name is "Smith" then chances are your family line had some artisan blacksmiths to boot.
I wonder what the last name "Dickinson" meant for people back in those days?