Unknown Jokes
59 unknown jokes and hilarious unknown puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about unknown that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you enjoy an occasional joke? Read through this article to uncover unknown jokes and identify them. Learn how to distinguish between famous and unknown stand-up comedy routines, and how to identify ligma and corny jokes. Uncover a hidden world of humor and start laughing.
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Funniest Unknown Short Jokes
Short unknown jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The unknown humour may include short anonymous jokes also.
- Funny unknown historical fact: Pharoahs were burried with their hands crossed their chest because it was a historical belief there would be countless water slide in the after life.
- An unknown number called me, sneezed and coughed a few times and then hung up. I'm getting tired of all these cold calls.
- Just when I thought today couldn't get any worse, an unknown assailant threw soy sauce all over me. Whoever it is sure knows how to Kikkoman when he's down.
- My wife suddenly started wearing a chastity belt for reasons unknown I can't quite put my finger in it
- I received a text message from an unknown number "I'm sorry. It's not your fault. I met someone else. Please don't call me anymore!"
... Even other people's girlfriends are dumping me now - A fool does last what a wise man does first. -unknown Looks like my chances of getting laid improve dramatically the older I get. Sweet!
- Yesterday, three unknown men attacked our fellow citizen in the park and burnt all his documents. Now, there are four unknown men.
- I want to discover an unknown species of animal and call it the peeve. That way, I could adopt one, and it'd be my pet peeve.
- While on duty, a police officer comes across an injured baby horse. The cause of the injury unknown, but the officer suspects foal play.
- Have you heard about that new david beckham film called "Into The Unknown"? It's about his visit to a library.
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Unknown One Liners
Which unknown one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with unknown? I can suggest the ones about unfinished and invisible.
- What do you call an unknown baker? John Dough
- "I'm going to be famous one day" -Unknown
- How To Scare Someone Who's Afraid Of The Unknown >!Boo!<
- Author Unknown "A tree never hits an automobile except in self-defense."
- A courtroom artist was arrested today for an unknown reason... The details are sketchy
- I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than be shot by an unknown assailant.
- How many unknown solar systems are there? If we knew they wouldn't be unknown.
- Friend: Hey Ed, an unknown old man called you. Ed: A boomerang?
- Why is Denis Leary a star while Bill Hicks is unknown? Because there's No Cure for Cancer
- I thought we all knew Anthony Bourdain But I guess some parts were unknown.
- Al-gebra is a mysterious organization. There are lots of unknowns...
- How does the Ultimate Warrior repair his car? With parts unknown.
- I don't know who this guy 'unknown' is but he comes up with some pretty rad quotes
- Dear God, why do you allow violence in schools? \
- TIL that subway was an idea stolen from an unknown man in 1934 Whoops, wrong sub
Hilarious Unknown Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends
What funny jokes about unknown you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean unable jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make unknown pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Lost Shakespearean Soliloquy
Scholars have found an heretofore unknown piece of Shakespeare's "Merry Wives of Windsor" thought to be an homage to Aristophanes' "Lysistrata." It is a short speech by a s**... frustrated squire named Fullstaff.
Mathematician joke.
A chemist and a physicist are lost in an unknown area. They see someone and decide to ask for help. "Excuse me, but can you tell us where we are?", asks the chemist. "Sure, you are here", replied the man and leaves. "That man is a mathematician", the chemist tells the physicist, "how do you know?", "What he told us is true and makes sense, but it is useless."
Have you heard of the annual ginger meeting?
It's petty unknown, last time not a single soul came.
Whenever I feel depressed in life.. I open my E-Mail spam inbox
I find:
* 10 banks are giving me easy loans.
* I have won GBP 10000000 and USD 500000 for unknown reasons.
* 10 Job companies have best jobs for me.
* 5 matrimonial sites have most suited matches for me.
* Dr. Batra has claimed that he will cure my hair fall.
* 3 universities are giving me degrees in random subjects.
* And Approx 40-50 mails from different girls who are feeling lonely and want to meet me.
A Coca Cola salesman returns from his Middle East assignment...
A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment.
A friend asked, Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?
The salesman explained, "When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I will make a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn't know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters... First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand... totally exhausted and fainting. Second, the man is drinking our Cola and Third, our man is now totally refreshed. Then these posters were pasted all over the place"
"That should have worked," said the friend.
The salesman replied, "Well, not only did I not speak Arabic, I also didn't realize that Arabs read from right to left..."
Valve time slower than thought
Researchers have calculated that it takes longer than expected for radioactive fluids with a half-life of 3 years to pass through valves. Reason unknown.
What did the dyslexic traveller say when he arrived at an unknown station?
Whoops, wrong sub.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Be serious with unknown girls.
Boy: The principal is so dumb!
Girl: Do you know who I am?
Boy: No...
Girl: I am the principal's daughter!
Boy: Do you know who I am?
Girl: No...
Boy: Good! *walks away*
We didn't know what to expect when we were told we had a new algebra teacher...
he really was an unknown quantity.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Wife is in hospital with unknown condition
So she asks her husband to go to her doctor and find out how bad is it.
'Well, her condition is very strange. Basically, you'll have to have s**... with her at least once a day or she will die' doctor sais.
Husband nods and goes back to his wife.
'Honey, what did the doctor say? ' wife is anxious to find out.
'He said you're going to die soon'...
Once in a lifetime opportunity…
Unknown: Define once in a lifetime opportunity.
Unknown: A mosquito, landing on your wife's face.
Obscene Caller
A woman answered a call from an unknown number.
"Hello," said the obscene caller, as he breathed heavily, "if you can guess what's in my hand, I'll give you a piece of the action."
Listen honey," drawled the lady, "if you can hold it in one hand, I ain't interested"
My history teacher told me a joke about WW2 today...
If you have unknown troops in front of you and you want to find out who they are, fire a few rounds in their direction.
If you are met with precision machine gun fire, they're German.
If you are met by a volley of precision rifle fire, they are British.
If they surrender, they're Italian.
If there is a mass wave of infantry and tanks, they're Russian.
If there is a bayonet and sword charge, they're Japanese.
If everything is quiet for a minute or two, and suddenly you are in the middle of a massive artillery barrage and air strikes, they are American.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Reminded of a variation of the Bee Pee joke
As we all know the majority of bees (Around 99 out of 100), when they need the toilet, always go to the BP station. The last for some unknown reason goes to the Esso Station.
Ah Well, I guess there's always one s**...in every crowd
A professor told his class: " Fame will come to you only after you succeed!" A blonde asked, "Who is 'Sid' ?"
Not my own, origin unknown
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Thousand of years has been passed, we made lot of progress, we understand science and maths better than ever, but still..
x is unknown and x**... is well known
A Prince was visiting a small, unknown village wearing a fancy hat made from the hair of a fox...
The villagers asked the Prince, "That is a magnificent hat you have, what made you decide to wear it?"
"Well", said the Prince, "I was telling the Queen about my plan to visit your small village and she replied, 'Wear the fox hat?' And that's why I'm wearing it today"
Understanding Women
A FATHER SAYS TO HIS SON :
"MY BOY, WHEN YOU ACCUMULATE THE UNDERSTANDING OF WHY A PIZZA IS BAKED ROUND,
PUT IN A SQUARE BOX , EATEN IN TRIANGLES, YOU'LL BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND WOMEN. "
Author Unknown
An unknown number calls a man at work.
He immediately hangs up without saying anything.
His boss watches him do this and asks, "Why did you hang up?"
The man answers, "I didn't know the number".
His boss, seething with rage, shouts "CALL THEM BACK RIGHT NOW".
The man complied and calls them back, saying, "911, what's your emergency?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Zelensky recieves a call from an unknown number (a joke)
Anon: Sir, I have a clear shot at putin. How much will you pay me for successful elimination?
Zelensky: 1 million dollas for not killing putin.
The man shocked at the response, asks for a reason for this.
Zelensky: No way the next guy they put in is going to be this incompetent
Two scientists are working together
Both have different projects to work on.
1st scientist saw 1 unknown chemical. Curiously, he asked,"Bro, what and whose chemical is this?"
2nd scientist replied, "Bromine"
Scientists have today discovered that dark matter actually does not exist.
The source of the unknown mass in the galaxy was never dark matter, but the result of a calculation mistake.
The scientists admit that they forgot to include your mother in the calculations, and therefor the last (approximately) 80% of the mass in the Milky Way has finally been discovered.
