Comical Unfair Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land
Steve Jobs would've been a better president than Trump.
But I guess comparing apples to oranges is unfair.
A minister and a lawyer at the pearly gates.
A minister and a lawyer arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter greeted both of them and gave them their room assignments.
"Pastor, here are the keys to one of our nicest efficiency units. And for you, sir, (to the lawyer) the keys to our finest p**... suit."
"This is unfair!" cried the minister.
"Listen," Saint Peter said, "ministers are a dime a dozen up here, but this is the first lawyer we've seen."
TIL that curling used to be coed...
But the decision was made to segregate because the committee felt the female members had an unfair advantage, being naturally better sweepers.
Why is twelve an unfair number?
Because it's two against one
Floyd Mayweather won because of an unfair advantage.
He gets to practice in the gym all day and then goes home and practices on his family.
"I have married a ton of women but not once have I ever had s**.... It's unfair!" a man complained in a bar.
"well," said the bartender, "what were you expecting, Father Peter?"
Sorry... dad joke.
Women say it's unfair that men get more attractive as we get older.
It's usually because we hit bottom really hard and bounce back up.
My wife always tells me that I treat my kid unfair. I don't even know which one she means.
Thomas, Carl or the fat and ugly one?
Four guys in a BMW found a parking place.
But as they approached some old guy took it. They all left the car, planning to beat that guy. Then he says:
'That's unfair. There are four of you and I'm alone and I'm old. '
'Well, OK. Two of us will join you.'
That's three agains two now.
You're right... Go home grandpa, we'll handle this without you.
My girlfriend studies law:
Me - What you reading?
Her - The Unfair Contract Terms Act 1977.
Me - Oh that's cool, anything about our relationship in there?
I didn't get any that night.
It is unfair how for every $1 a man makes, a woman makes $0.78...
Because then the man is left with only $0.22...
You can explore unfair sincere reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean unfair illogical dad jokes. There are also unfair puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
What's the difference between Steve Jobs and Donald Trump?
A good many things, but it's a little unfair to compare Apples to oranges.
A lawyer died at 40 and reached pearly gates
He complained to St. Peter "It is unfair! Why I had to die at young age. I was just 40".
St. Peter Replied "We decided to count billable hours. According to that you are 90."
Little Johnny can't be punished
Little Johnny asks the teacher, Mrs Roberts, can I be punished for something I haven't done?
Mrs Roberts is shocked, Of course not, Johnny, that would be very unfair!
Little Johnny is relieved, OK Mrs Roberts, sorry, I haven't done my homework.
What's unfair?
Someone stealing a letter from the carnival sign.
The author of what's been described as the world's worst thesaurus has dismissed the comments.
He's described the comments as unfair, unfair and unfair.
It's so unfair that McDonalds turned their logo into a W for women's day
It's not like it they made it an M on men's day.
Such an unfair world. When a man talks dirty to a woman it's considered s**... harassment.
But when a woman talks dirty to a man it's Β£2.50/min (charges may vary).
Why did the political theory class think their teacher was being unfair?
He gave the whole class the same Marx
One day, Hot Dog Bun Boy came home from school...
His mother saw him come in looking pretty glum and asked, "What's the matter Hot Dog Bun Boy? Did something happen?"
Hot Dog Bun Boy replied, "I was in my history class and it's so frustrating that there are no lessons at all about Hot Dog Buns like us! It's so unfair!"
The mother came up to Hot Dog Bun Boy and gave him a consoling hug. She then said, "I know son, it's not fair. But in the end, history is written by the wieners."
They say that Republicans no longer embody the Christian values they preach...
That's a little unfair if you ask me. They follow the golden rule perfectly. Whoever has the gold, rules.
I got thrown out of the amputee club for having all of my limbs
In my opinion that was an unfair dismemberment
Dad: Participation trophies are bad. It rewards people for losing and is unfair to the winners.
Me: *slowly takes down his confederate flag*
Why is it unfair to compare Trump to h**...?
h**... started with nothing. Trump got a million bucks from his dad.
We need to stop mixing races. By doing so it creates people with an unfair advantage when it comes to competition.
No matter how hard I try I still can't outrun a Nascar.
Donald Trump announced that he wants to put a cap on immigrants in the near future.
That seems unfair. They should be allowed to wear whatever they want.
Unfair , girls get over 400 likes when they show a little n**... on facebook
When I showed a little head I only got banned
Hitting a deer with your car is always an unfair trade.
You're out the cost of the insurance deductible, but nature is only out a buck.
I think I'm being unfair to short girls
I always look down on them.
I'd say it's unfair that kids born into antivax families have to grow up believing that kind of stupidity is okay...
...but that problem sorta solves itself after the first few years, doesn't it...?
My son wasn't allowed on the rollercoaster because he wasn't big enough. How unfair is that!
.... making a two-year-old watch their dad go on it alone.
As an American, I see a lot of jokes here saying that America is the dumbest country.
It's ridiculous and unfair.
Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country.
My new girlfriend told me I'm terrible in bed
I told her it's unfair to make a judgement in less than a minute
How much English can you speak
"Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client toγbe accused of theft. He arrived in New York City a week ago and barely knew hisγway around. What's more, he only speaks a few words of English."
The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?"
The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!"
Breaking News: Supreme court has ruled that basic intelligence tests for Election voting is Discriminatory.
The judge said that it is unfair to block all Republicans from voting.
I was unfairly fired from the zoo
What was I meant to do? There were signs everywhere saying 'don't feed the animals'
My girlfriend said I'm terrible in bed
But it's unfair to make a conclusion in 17 seconds
After I did a Rorschach test, the therapist said I was a pervert.
That's unfair. He's the one with the dirty pictures.
My parents are very unfair... they scolded me for something I didn't even do!
My homework.
For every Dollar a man makes a woman makes 70 cents. That's really unfair.
That only leaves the man with 30c.
My mom is forcing me out and it's totally unfair...
I've only lived here for 9 months
I don't like to eat anything labeled "reformed ham"
As I think it is unfair that the pigs are slaughtered after they've got their lives back on track.
A lot of people have compared Trump to h**..., but this is totally unfair.
h**... had the decency to admit defeat.
People who do fossil hunting already have an unfair advantage
The fossils are already dead
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, the rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town to "persuade" them to close. Terrified, they did so - thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
My wife keeps complaining how unfair it is that I played no part in the birth of our daughter...
when I feel like I in fact played the *semenal* role
A thief was expelled from music school.
It was a bit unfair, all he was doing was taking notes.
