Uneasy Jokes
10 uneasy jokes and hilarious uneasy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about uneasy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Share These Uneasy Jokes With Friends
Laughter Uneasy Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity
What is a good uneasy joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
The creative writing students all shifted a little uneasy as they realized they had clearly picked the wrong professor
I woke up one night to someone knocking on my front door.
I felt uneasy, but I went and answered it anyway. When I opened the door, I looked around, and then spotted a shellfish on my welcome mat.
"Let me in", it cried, "I'm being chased by a bunch of wasps."
That was when I realized why I felt so uneasy.
This was the clam before the swarm.
I watched a documentary about the 1936 summer Olympics in Berlin
It seemed like a wonderful event, but it made me uneasy every time the officials said, "Let's make this a good, clean race."
The Whale was uneasy.
"I'm afraid Jonah is not satisfied with his accommodations" said the whale.
"What gave you that idea?" queried the octopus.
"Oh, I have inside information" said the whale.
I'm not really sure I trust my nervous system.
Something about it makes me...... uneasy...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An medical forensics professor was giving an introductory lecture to a class of students.
Standing over a corpse, he addressed the class. There are two things you need to make a career in medical forensics. First, you must have no fear. Having said that, he shoved his finger up the corpse's a**..., withdrew it, then licked his finger. Now you must do the same, he told the class. After a couple of minutes of uneasy silence, the class did as instructed.
Second, the professor continued, you must have an acute sense of observation. For instance, how many of you noticed that I put my middle finger up this man's a**..., but licked my index finger?
After years of going to catholic church I've finally decided to seek other points of view on religion...
... After countless hours of study and understanding, I felt an uneasy feeling in my stomach.
Had I made a mistake? Had I crossed a benevolent God?
I had studied Judaism in Israel,
Buddhism in Tibet,
Even to indigenous areas of the globe to to better understand what it means to have a God.
After all of this, I found myself being discharged from an Indian hospital, surrounded by doctors and nurses, and I say
Am I dying ?
The head doctor replies
No, you were just Sikh for a few days .
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Reunion
*What is Reunion?*
Reunion is when you get up in the morning and tell your wife you are going to work.
Instead you go to your neighbour's wife to make love to her.
Her husband comes and knocks on the door.
You go under the bed.
The husband enters the bedroom.
Feeling uneasy, the wife excuses herself to go to market to buy food items.
The husband takes advantage of the wife's absence to call your wife.
Your wife quickly arrives and they make love.
Suddenly his wife who had excused herself to go to the market turned back halfway forgetting the list of food items at home and knocks on the door.
You're still under the bed.
Your wife rushes to hide under the bed.
*This is REUNION*
Fright Flight
After waiting for what seemed like an eternity, the flight attendant announces over the intercom that, "We're just waiting for the pilots."
The passengers look out the windows, and see two men, dressed in pilot's uniforms, walking towards the plane.
Both men are using guide dogs and appear to be blind.
There are murmurs among the passengers, and some believe it is a joke.
The men board the plane and go into the cockpit.
More concerned murmurs and uneasy chuckles from the passengers.
The plane taxis normally to the runway and begins its takeoff.
As passengers look out the window, they realize they are nearing the end of the runway!!
The entire passenger cabin begins screaming, but the plane lifts off, just before the end of the runway.
The passengers calm down and chuckle to themselves, at this point believing that they fell for a joke.
In the cockpit, the pilot turns to his copilot and says, "You know, one day those people are gonna scream too late and we're all gonna die!"
Two pilots walk into their plane from the back...
They're wearing dark glasses and each of them has a white cane. They stumble down the aisle tapping their canes and eventually make it to the cockpit.
Naturally the passengers whom they've passed are a bit uneasy, but nobody says anything.
Within 15 minutes the plane begins to move.
The plane taxis down the runway gaining speed. However, they don't take off.
Passengers are looking out the window at the nearing end of the runway. As they get closer and closer one woman lets out a bloodcurling scream, prompting many others to do the same.
At that exact moment the plane takes off.
In the cockpit one of the blind pilots says to the other "one of these days they're not gonna scream..."
Share These Uneasy Jokes With Friends
