Underground Jokes
130 underground jokes and hilarious underground puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about underground that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Discover some of the funniest jokes hidden away underground in London. Ever thought of underground mining or animals that live beneath the surface? How about deez nuts jokes and the decomposing bodies that lurk in the sewers? Get ready to laugh as we delve deep into jokes that lie beneath.
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Funniest Underground Short Jokes
Short underground jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The underground humour may include short underneath jokes also.
- My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water" I know he means well...
- Devil: This is the lake of lava you will be spending eternity in Me: Actually, since we're underground, it would be magma
Devil: You understand this is why you're here, right? - Have you heard about that new zelda game where you play as Zelda on a quest through underground caves? Search for the link below.
- When I heard the news that 12 Thai schoolboys had been rescued from underground... I had to run home and make sure my basement was still padlocked.
- The government just built an underground prison. They call it Concave. It's full of convex.
- What did the hipster say about the Chilean miners? I liked them so much better when they were underground.
- You have to wonder about the people who go 10 miles below the speed limit. How did they get so far underground?
- Two old englishmen are standing on the underground platform The first old man asks "Is this Wembley?"
The other replies "No, Thursday."
The first replies "Ah! So am I. Shall we go and get a pint?" - I found out about this cool underground band called The Beatles. Well actually only about half of them are underground at the moment.
- My great-grandfather started up an underground distillery during Prohibition It was a whiskey business
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Underground One Liners
Which underground one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with underground? I can suggest the ones about underwater and undercover.
- Did you know it's impossible to eat baklava underground? Because then it's bakmagma
- I went to an underground party dressed as a bird. I was raven for hours.
- The reason the earth's core is hot Is because my mixtape is so underground
- Archaeologists are the ultimate hipsters They love all that underground stuff.
- How was the guy in the underground water reservoir doing? Well.
- All the hipsters love Steve Jobs ...now that he's underground.
- How did blind slaves escape the South? The Underground Braille-road
- Why is the underground dog so loud? It's a subwoofer.
- Well, well, well. If it isn't an underground source of water
- I WOULD tell you about the secret underground library... But its very hush hush
- I guess hipsters love living in London Maybe it's just the underground
- Why are Apple products popular with hipsters? Steve Jobs went underground.
- What's The Incredible Hulk's favourite London Underground station? Turnham Green!
- Have you ever heard of Tupac? You probably haven't, he's pretty underground
- What do you call a Wookie war-cry on the London Underground? Tube-haka
Going Underground Jokes
Here is a list of funny going underground jokes and even better going underground puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- A rabbi worked the criminal underground had to go on the run after a circumcision.. He would've been caught if he hadn't gotten that tip off.
- I'd been refusing to go exploring underground for months, Eventually I caved.
- What is the difference between Pokemon go and the tube Nothing, they are both underground...
- How did the hipster narco escape from prison? By going underground
London Underground Jokes
Here is a list of funny london underground jokes and even better london underground puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I taught my pet dog to play the trumpet on the London Underground today He went from Barking to Tooting in about 15 minutes
- TIL that there's a unique species of mosquito found only in the London Underground. It's a cross between a regular mosquito and an oyster card.
Underground Tunnel Jokes
Here is a list of funny underground tunnel jokes and even better underground tunnel puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My doctor said to be careful when i drive underground with other people in the car Otherwise i might get carpool tunnel syndrome
- A group of programmers painstakingly made a small underground passage, that somehow got smaller if it was used too often. They called it the Carpal Tunnel
- What is a painful experience driving with others underground called? Carpool tunnel
- What's a danger in driving underground with friends? Carpool Tunnel Syndrome
- I rode to work today in the underground HOV lane... They called it the carpool tunnel.
Underground Mining Jokes
Here is a list of funny underground mining jokes and even better underground mining puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I recently started a recruitment agency that only deals with the underground mining industry. It's called, Staff It Where The Sun Don't Shine.
- Calcium requires the least amount of work to mine. Because it is commonly found 6 feet underground.
- Whose underground shaft should we dig for minerals in? Mine
Cheeky Underground Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle
What funny jokes about underground you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean submarine jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make underground pranks.
Anyone else hear the new whitney houston song they just released?
No? Well it's very underground right now.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
"My girlfriend? You wouldn't know her. She's a bit underground."
...said the hipster necrophiliac.
What do dwarves and hipsters have in common? (just made this joke up, help me if I can word it better)
They're underground, and it's hard to tell males from females.
or something like that =)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why does the hipster make c**... coffee?
The beans are always under-ground.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What a dumb blonde... wait...
*Blonde goes into a bank
Blonde: I need a loan for $5,000.
Bank-teller: We'll need some sort of deposit.
Blonde: Ok, here's the keys to my car (Mercedes-Benz S600)
*Blonde leaves
Bank-teller(laughing): She's so s**...! Leaving a $100,000 car as a deposit for a $5,000 loan.
*Bank-teller parks car in secret underground parking garage. Then he does research on the blonde and finds out she's a multimillionaire.
Bank-teller: She's an idiot! Why would she borrow $5,000 if she's a multimillionaire?
*Two weeks later
*Blonde comes back and pays bank-teller $5,000 with $15.41 interest
Bank-teller: Why would you borrow $5,000 and leave an expensive car here if you're a multimillionaire?
Blonde: Where else in New York City can you park a $100,000 car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it not to get stolen?
*
What's green, little, eats stones and lives 1,5meters underground?
The little green stone eater.
If theres a hole through the whole earth and you droppes a rock, how far down will it go?
1,5meters then the little, green stone eater will eat it.
Why won't hipsters listen to the Beatles until Ringo Starr and Paul McCartney die?
Because they only want to listen to the Beatles when they're underground.
I'm such a hipster...
I'm such a hipster that I won't listen to the Beatles until they're all dead. That way I can say I was a fan when they were underground.
Falklands veteran
A British officer spotted a busker in the London Underground with a sign that read: "VETERAN SOLDIER OF THE FALKLANDS WAR." The officer thought, "Poor chap, I was there and it was awful!" Feeling sorry for a fellow veteran, he took £20 out of his wallet and gave it to the busker. The officer was then greeted with a hearty: "Gracias, Señor!"
My friend just told me he's opening up an underground water storage facility.
Oh, three of them, actually.
Well, well, well...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I heard there's this amazing place underground...
...where you can have s**... with miners.
This is terrible, and I'd like to apologize in advance, but could anyone tell me why hipsters prefer corpses over zombies?
Corpses are still underground.
Why can hipsters listen to Michael Jackson again?
He's been underground for five years now.
Why are the Ninja Turtles on the No-Fly list?
Because they are members of an underground Splinter cell.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A joke about Germans - I´m German and i was rolling on the floor laughing about it
Q: Why do they bury Germans 20 meters underground?
A: Because deep down they are really nice.
Have you guys heard the new Potato album?
I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't, it's pretty underground
A Blonde Woman Asks For A $5000 Loan
A blonde woman walks into a bank in NYC before going on vacation and asks for a $5,000 loan.
The banker asks, "Okay, miss, is there anything you would like to use as collateral?"
The woman says, "Yes, of course. I'll use my Rolls Royce."
The banker, stunned, asks, "A $250,000 Rolls Royce? Really?"
The woman is completely positive. She hands over the keys, as the bankers and loan officers laugh at her.
They check her credentials, make sure she is the title owner. Everything checks out.
They park it in their underground garage for two weeks.
When she comes back, she pays off the $5,000 loan as well as the $15.41 interest.
The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very appreciative of your business with us, but I have one question.
We looked you up and found out that you are a multi-millionaire.
Why would you want to borrow $5,000?"
The woman replies,
"Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and
expect it to be there when I return?"
I'm in a Josef Fritzl tribute band...
You probably haven't heard of us, we're pretty underground.
Did you hear about the little guy compelled to clap in time whenever he was on the Paris underground?
He was a Métro gnome.
Why Are Germans Buried 20 Feet Underground?
Because deep down they're real nice
Why did the chicken bury its egg underground?
He wanted to grow an eggplant
Joke from my dad.
What's the difference between an expression of confusion and an underground German woman?
One's a furrowed brow and the other is a burrowed Frau.
What's wrong with Andrew Jackson?
He had an Underground Rail Road too, called the Trail of Tears.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call the underground s**... trade?
The black market.
How does the German underground excavation site owner get to work?
Mein Shaft.
If you made a wall hanging out of cheap necklaces bought from the merch tables at small, underground rock concerts...
Would you have a Decoration of Indie Pendants?
I'm really good at digging underground to find sources of water.
You could say it's something I do well.
Some campers wake up in the morning and start making breakfast...
Nearby is a family of moles living in their burrow underground. Papa mole wakes up and crawls up to the hole and says, "It smells delicious up here! I can smell sausage and eggs and is that some ham frying too?" So mama mole climbs up and she's greeted with the sweet smells of breakfast. "I smell fresh toast and flap jacks and maybe a hint of cinnamon!" Baby mole tries to enjoy the smells but can't get past mama and papa through the hole and says, "All I can smell is molasses."
TIL Harriet Tubman wasn't a real person.
It was just what the slaves shouted to each other on the Underground Railroad, "Hurry it up, man!"
Cr
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The English professor at once realized that the underground tunnel's never gonna get finished.
It's s**... to think it's gonna see the light of the day.
An epileptic cop brakes up a drug ring in an underground night club.
It was a search and seizure.
Why do underground hackers report their income to the IRS?
They know how the system will react to sin tax errors
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm digging this extremely irresistible woman
They really do bury them six feet underground.
With the help of the villagers, Mike who fell into the well finally ....
adapted to live underground.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I read recently that the New York mob helped fund and protect the underground gay clubs in the 60s.
Guess you could call them the Free d**... Mafia
I used to have a life before I started serving drinks at underground clubs.
Now I'm behind bars.
Houston, Texas, is six feet underwater
Unlike Whitney Houston, who is six feet underground.
People who constantly brag about their ancestors are like potatoes;
The only good part is underground.
Note: I heard this one in Bulgaria.
What kind of material is Super Mario's pants made out of???
A: Denim Denim Denim.
(Said with the voice inflection of the music for when he goes underground)
My great grandmother worked on the Underground Railroad...
She lived in NYC, we just called it the subway.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The next Tarantino film is going to be an Underground hit
it is about s**... with Miners
What do you call a board game for a family that lives underground?
"Fun for hole family."
You ever hear about the hipster cowboy?
He went to pay respects to the people buried at Boot Hill.
. . .you've probably never heard of them, because they're so underground.
Cemeteries sure seem to have become popular
But I remember when they used to be underground
I ran into a 19 year old hipster who's favorite musician was Jimi Hendrix...
It was so strange to see a hipster who liked older music, so I had to ask, What about his music did you like so much?
I just love underground artists he replied.
How is a cicada like a neckbeard?
They both spend years living underground and when they emerge all you hear is endless whizzing.
I just passed what looked like a cemetery
...but it think it was really an underground club.
You know what they're gonna say when Tony Hawk dies?
Tony Hawks Underground
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Archaeologists discovered an ancient city in Iraq.
According to the archaeologists, ancient Iraqis looked like skeletons, lived underground, and walked lying down.
I just found out about this underground science ring
It's called the Large Hadron Collider
What does a progressive conservative look like?
I dunno, it's hard to tell when they're all 6 feet underground.
Still Not Sure Why People Consider Mac Miller and XXXTentacion Mainstream?
I mean they are some of the only true underground rappers.
I dont like the fact that the Thailand cave boys have become all famous and mainstream.
I preferred them when they were more Underground
A lot of people are afraid of getting buried underground...
...but that's really only a miner problem.
Starting the day in London
Two friends from London on the phone:
Guy 1: Hey mate, what's up?
Guy 2: Not much. I am smelling one chicks hair whilst another one is walking all over me in her high heels.
Guy 1: Oh I see, call me when you get off the underground.
What do you call an underground waterflow
Well hidden.
