Under The Sea Jokes
51 under the sea jokes and hilarious under the sea puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about under the sea that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Under The Sea Short Jokes
Short under the sea jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The under the sea humour may include short underwater jokes also.
- This girl I met on Tinder had a tattoo of a seashell on her innerthigh If you put your ear against it and listened closely, you could smell the sea.
- Dating is a lot like fishing Sure, there's plenty of fish in the sea. But until i catch one, I'm just stuck here holding my rod.
- A guy walking to library and asks for a book on sea turtles. The librarian asks "hard back?"
The guy replies "yeah little heads too." - I dreamed I drowned in an ocean made of orange soda. When I woke I realized it was just a Fanta sea.
- When my grandfather died we scattered his remains in the sea Everyone on the beach panicked because we didn't cremate him...
- An old one. What lies on the bottom of the sea and shakes? A nervous wreck!
I first heard this at xmas 1952 (64 years ago) and it still makes me smile. - The last time a group of New Englanders destroyed Atlanta this badly Sherman marched to the sea
- How does a pregnant mermaid give birth? "Sea-section"
Sorry, I thought of that last night and just had to share my genius with the world. - Scientists have been studying the effect of cannabis on sea birds They've left no tern unstoned
- AMA: I am a submarine naval commander discharged for friendly fire in an underwater sea battle Oops, wrong sub.
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Under The Sea One Liners
Which under the sea one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with under the sea? I can suggest the ones about deep sea and middle of the ocean.
- Did you know that iceland... ...is only one sea away from Ireland?
- Sometimes I feel like a seal is just a neutral sea lion Neutral
As in
Without an ion - What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's lost at sea? Bob.
- what is the difference between a seal and a sea lion? An electron.
- How do you turn a seal into a sea lion? Remove an electron.
- When you're down by the sea and an eel bites your knee.. ..That's a moray..
- How does a pirate greet a sea monster? What's Kraken?
- What do sea monsters like to eat? Fish and ships
- How do mermaids give birth? A sea section.
- Why did the vet turn away the injured sea animal? Do not accept if seal is broken.
- What did the sea say to the river? You can run but you can't tide!
- The Navy is beginning to recruit blind men. They are sending them out to sea.
- Why did the sailor ground his son? His grades were below sea level
^^im ^^so ^^sorry - What is a duck's favorite sea monster? A Quacken
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea? because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels.
Howlingly Hilarious Under The Sea Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening
What funny jokes about under the sea you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean submarine jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make under the sea pranks.
"Leagues" in "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea" refers to horizontal distance, not depth.
Otherwise it would be called "Journey to the Center of the Earth."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
*RANT TIME* Please can we stop with the flashing blue outdoor Christmas lights this year ?
Every time I come around the corner, I think it's the police and I have a panic attack.
I have to brake hard, toss my wine out the window, hide the w**..., fasten my seat belt, throw my phone on the floor, turn my radio down, and push the machete under the seat, all while trying to drive.
It's just too much drama, even for Christmas.
Thank you for your cooperation and understanding.
Finally they named the book about the Titan Submarine.
20,000 Leaks Under the Sea
A farmer and his new bride
A farmer and his brand new bride were riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the older horse stumbled.
The farmer said, "That's once."
A little further along, the poor old horse stumbled again.
The farmer said, "That's twice."
After a little, while the poor old horse stumbled again.
The farmer didn't say anything, but reached under the seat, pulled out a shotgun and shot the horse.
His brand new bride yelled, telling him, "That was an awful thing to do."
The farmer said, "That's once." ( had to repost,missed the first half the first time.)
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Madeleine McCann
TIL that Jules Verne did not write Twenty Thousand Leagues under the Sea
He wrote at a desk like a sensible person would.
What lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Malaysia flight 370
I Hate My Life
I hate my life. I'm 22 and work at a fast food restaurant where my coworker hates me with a burning passion.
I'm extremely underpaid and if I ask for a raise my boss will kill me. I hate my town and the people in it. But I can't leave because I don't have a license.
And do you want to hear the worst part?
I live in a pineapple under the sea.
What font do they use under the sea?
Ariel
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I just met the most poor guy on this planet
He is the most hated person in his city despite being a nice guy, his boss pays him almost no money, his best friend is a total idiot, the only girl that talks to him lives in her own bubble, and the worst:
He lives in a pineapple under the sea.....
A cargo ship carrying a shipment of mannequins sunk to the ocean floor
It was one thousand legs under the sea.
Shoutout to the ex-mobster who, through witness protection, was relocated in a house under the sea.
Rest easy, you're sleeping with the fishes now.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Bacteria
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
No one, they don't grow underwater and don't act as houses.
Do you know what Disney song is really deep?
Under The Sea.
It would make sense if Spongebob was homeless in real life
Because who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
A divers reached 300 meters under the sea
Diver : the pressure here is immense
Fish : all the cool kids take drugs
Diver : all the cool kids you say?
A man is scouring through his house
He's looking under his couch. He couldn't find it. He looks in his bedroom draws and under his bed. Still couldn't find it. He checks his car, front and back. He looks under the seats and no matter how hard he tries but he still can't find it. He looks through the bathroom and even in his wife's purse and still no luck finding it. His wife wakes up due to all of the noise. She says, "Honey, what are you looking for?" He responds "The punchline to this joke!"
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Failing students who like pineapple.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Bin Laden
I just read Jules Verne's 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea
It sure is a story with a lot of depth.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Gary
What is Kim Wall's favorite book?
20,000 Leagues Under the Sea
Someone said that his friend passed away by drowning. He also said that he would be watching over him.
I shout out, "Lies! His friend would be watching under him. Under the Sea."
A farmer and his brand new bride were riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the older horse stumbled.
The farmer said, "That's once."A little further along, the poor old horse stumbled again. The farmer said, "That's twice."After a little, while the poor old horse stumbled again. The farmer didn't say anything, but reached under the seat, pulled out a shotgun and shot the horse. His brand new bride yelled, telling him, "That was an awful thing to do."The farmer said, "That's once."
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Houston, Texas.
What do you call 1,000 Cubans under the sea?
Good immigration policy.
Why is Under the Sea a sexist song?
Because 'it's always better down where it's wetter'...
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Jack Dawson.
God's omnipresence
God's omnipresence means that He too lives in a pineapple under the sea.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
POLICE ROADBLOCK
Two r**..., Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said, "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a po-lice roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!" "Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat." "What fer?" asked Bubba. "Just let me do the talkin', OK?" said Earl. Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat, and each put a label on their forehead. When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?" "No sir," Earl said. "We're on the patch."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Beer-o-derm
One day, two r**... named Bubba and Earl were driving down the road, drinking a couple of Buds.
The passenger, Bubba, said, "Looky thar up ahead Earl. It's a po-leece roadblock.
We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!"
"Don't worry Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, then throw the bottles under the seat."
"What fer?" asked Bubba.
"Just let me do the talking, okay?" said Earl.
They finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat and slapped the labels on their foreheads.
When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "Have you boys been drinking?"
"No sir." said Earl. "We're on the patch."
Where's Malaysian Airlines?
In a pineapple under the sea
DirecTV/Spongebob Joke
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
I don't know I have DirecTV.
I don't always say "who lives in a pineapple under the sea", but when I do...
I can't hear you!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two r**..., Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud.
The passenger, Bubba, said "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a police roadblock!!
We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!!"
"Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers then peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat."
"What fer?", asked Bubba.
"Just let me do the talkin', OK?," said Earl.
Well, they finished their beers, threw the empties out of sight & put label on each of their foreheads.
When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?"
"No, sir," said Earl while pointing at the labels. "We're on the patch."
