Howlingly Hilarious Uncontrollable Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy
Buying aspirin
Joe has always had an uncontrollable twitch in his left eyelid since young. Fred has a splitting headache and asks Joe to go get some aspirins. Half an hour later Joe comes back with a dozen packets of condoms.
"I asked you to get me aspirins, not condoms."
"Yeah, I went to a dozen drug stores, but have you ever tried asking for aspirin with a tic in your eye?"
A man suffers from Blepharospasm (constant, uncontrollable winking) in one eye...
he complains to a friend that it gives him the most awful head aches. His friend asks, why don't you just get some aspirin from the pharmacy. He replies, I do, but every time I ask the pharmacist for an aspirin he gives me a packet of condoms.
He: I have a f**......
She: An uncontrollable desire to return to the imperial measurement system??
A girl asks her father how she got her name
The man replies, "well, Daisy, when you were born a daisy pedal fell off the flower and onto your head, just as a rose pedal did with your sister, Rose." Then her younger sister came running in Laughing and screaming uncontrollable, to which the father shouted, "stop it Cinderblock!"
There used to be no treatment for those uncontrollable urges as a kleptomaniac...
...nowadays, you can just take something for it.
Me: [uncontrollable sobbing] I can't see you anymore. I won't let you hurt me again.
Trainer: It was a sit-up. You did one sit-up.
My Jewish family banned beans,
Ever since my grandfather died of uncontrollable gas.
Hey! What do they call a bear that has uncontrollable emotions?
A Bipolar bear.
How to change the blinker fluid in your car or truck:
STEP ONE: wear safety glasses! If you get any fluid in your eye, it will cause uncontrollable blinking until you wash it out.
I know a woman with an uncontrollable s**... desire towards books.
She's an infomaniac
What gives you uncontrollable gas?
n**...
You can explore uncontrollable control reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean uncontrollable unreasonable dad jokes. There are also uncontrollable puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Any time I see smiling psychics on TV, I have this uncontrollable urge to slap them in the face.
I guess I'm always willing to strike a happy medium.
I have an uncontrollable hatred for abbreviations!
Ask me anything.
Girl, you're like p**......
You're toxic and fill me with uncontrollable rage.
What Gives Me Uncontrollable Gas?
Auschwitz.
(I played this hand in CAH <3)
What happens when a p**... has an anxiety attack?
He gets uncontrollable thots.
I hate how people manage a whole month without bathing.
I start to feel uncontrollable itching after 25 days.
Why are storms always called girls names?
Because when they come they are always wet and uncontrollable, and when they disappear they take or destroy all your stuff
What's one sign you're addicted to Angry Birds?
Whenever you visit the supermarket, you feel sudden and uncontrollable urges to knock over crates. (We have a top 10 of these. Are we allowed to link to this list?)
